100 Ways to Say I Love You
by Writing in SIN
Summary: There are 100 ways to say "I love you" and as time passes, Emu and Parad start to discover all of them.
1. Pull over, let me drive for awhile

**NOTE**: I'm on a ParaEmu agenda and I'm taking y'all down with me XD

These series of oneshots will mostly be post-series of Ex-Aid and while I understand there are those who liked True Ending and the Another Ending trilogy, it won't be canon in this fic. Some plot points from those movies will be included but nothing more than that.

I hope you'll enjoy the fic and if you can, please leave a **review!**

* * *

**"Pull over. Let me drive for awhile."**

* * *

It's been a long day. So much so that he can see Emu struggling to stay awake as he walks back to their apartment.

"Emu~" Parad singsongs inside their shared mind space when Emu almost ran into a telephone pole. Again. "Pull over. Let me drive for awhile."

His partner lets out a rueful snort as he grumbles under his breath. "My body is not a _car_, Parad."

"No," he agrees with a chuckle. "But you're gonna crash like one if you continue on like this."

Emu pouts as he stumbles on. "M'fine."

Holding back a laugh, Parad gives Emu a gentle nudge to look at a sign that he _knows_ that neither of them would recognise. "Says the guy who got us lost."

"...eh?" When Emu reads the sign that decidedly shows them that they're not on the right path, Emu throws his head back with a groan. "Are you kidding me!? Since when?"

"Dunno. I just woke up myself when I felt you were blacking out."

Emu rubs his face with a sigh. "Sorry."

"Not your fault." Parad wraps his arms around Emu's neck from behind, invisible and intangible to everyone but his friend. "You had a really difficult shift today."

"That's an understatement." Emu burrows in his arms as he chuckles. "Parad?"

"Hm?"

Emu brings up a hand to gently squeeze his arm. "Thanks for being here with me today, especially since I know you prefer playing games rather than be in scrubs."

"I don't mind." Tightening his hold onto Emu, he buries his nose into Emu's hair. "I got to spend the whole day with you after all."

Emu lets out a sleepy laugh and Parad can feel that Emu is starting to drift off in his arms and they can't have that; especially not in the middle of a sidewalk.

Chuckling, he nudges his nose to Emu's cheek to rouse up his friend. "C'mon, I'll take over for you."

"...No detours?"

"Promise."

Emu lets out a jaw breaking yawn before he finally nods. "Thanks, Parad."

"Anytime."

Trading places has become easier compared to what he forced upon Emu all those months ago. These days its like closing their eyes before finding one in the driver's seat while the other settles within their mind space. So as Emu curls up to sleep, Parad stretches his borrowed body before quickly finding the right direction to Emu's apartment.

Once inside, Parad prepares for bed; quickly washing up and changing into pyjamas before finally settling into the rather large single bed. In his signature red, blue and violet pixels, he separates himself from Emu, then carefully tucks the paediatrician in. Brushing Emu bangs away from his forehead, Parad smiles down at the relaxed features of his friend; free from the day's stress. When he's about to pull away, a hand shoots out to grab his wrist and Parad turns to see Emu blearily squinting up at him.

"Stay," Emu mumbles out, words slurring from sleep.

Parad tilts his head. "You sure? It might be a bit bright since I wanna finish my current checkpoint."

Emu smiles up at him, tugging his wrist so that Parad will crawl into bed and settles by the headboard beside the doctor. "That's okay...just want you here with me."

"For as long as you want me," he reassures, bringing the blanket up to Emu's shoulders as Emu shifts closer to curl at Parad's side.

After fluffing up his pillow, Parad pulls out his console from a pocket and mutes the game. Making himself comfortable, Parad plays into the night right by Emu's side as he slumbers.


	2. It reminded me of you

**NOTE**: I'm on a ParaEmu agenda and I'm taking y'all down with me XD

I hope you'll enjoy the chapter and if you can, please leave a **review!**

* * *

**"It reminded me of you."**

* * *

When it's decided that Parad would live with him; weeks after his resurrection, Emu honestly didn't know what to expect despite being excited at the fact that he'd be roommates with the best friend he's been waiting years for. After all, he hasn't cohabitate with another person since...well, never if Emu was to be honest since he doesn't remember his mother since she died not long after Emu was born.

And the less said about Kiyonaga, the better.

In reality, whatever worries he had about living with Parad ended up being unfounded because sharing space with Parad really is one of the easiest things he's ever done in his life. If anything, it eases something deep and fundamental within him because for the first time in years, the aching loneliness that used to follow him around throughout his life has finally vanished from his heart.

Time passes and life goes on.

It's not long after they start living together that Emu begins to notice that while Parad is a messy roommate, he barely has any possessions with him. The only constant is the handheld console that Parad brings everywhere he goes. When he realised that, Emu learned to pay closer attention to things that Parad might need or even want but it's not exactly an easy task since Parad doesn't seem to care much about shopping for anything beyond what's necessary, in which case, it has more to do with groceries or things they may need for chores. Doesn't help that Parad never asks for anything either.

For some reason, that last part makes his heart aches the most.

So while they're out for groceries, Emu passes by the utensils aisle within the supermarket and sees a mug painted with red and blue puzzle pieces. It's nothing much in retrospect but the moment Emu sees the simple thing, he purchases it without much thought beyond that its something Parad might like.

"Emu~" Wearing a pixel designed purple thumbhole sweater and grey jeans to easily blend in with the crowd, Parad bounds over to him with his half of their groceries already paid for and in plastic bags. His bugster grins at him before snapping a double popsicle in half and offers one to him. "Our favourite."

Emu takes it with an answering smile. "Strawberry?"

"Duh." Plopping the treat into his mouth, Parad settles beside him as they walk together in tandem. Quirking a brow, Parad gestures to the box hanging on his wrist. "Whassat?"

Emu offers the box to Parad with a bashful grin. "It's for you actually."

"Me?" Quickly finishing his popsicle, Parad reaches over to eagerly take the proffered box before he opens it to take out the mug with awe in his eyes.

Emu rubs his neck when Parad looks at him in question. "I thought that it's not fair that you don't have a lot of things to call your own and well, when I saw that, it reminded of you, so..."

"I love it," Parad reassures, clutching the mug close as he beams at Emu. The grin itself is unlike the ones he usually sees as it lights up Parad's features in a way that makes Emu's heart ache in a much different way; warm and precious. "Thanks, Emu."

Shrugging, he knocks their shoulders together with a laugh. "No problem."

As they walk back to their apartment, Emu observes the way Parad cradles his impromptu gift with care and excitement. Seeing how happy Parad is in having something simple as a mug to call his own, Emu resolves to make sure that Parad has more chances like right now to experience in the future.


	3. No, no it's my treat

**TIMELINE:** Post-canon; pre-relationship

* * *

**"No, no it's my treat."**

* * *

They're out for Hiroshima style okonomiyaki tonight.

Most of the time, he and Emu prefer to eat back at their apartment but it's nice to have a change of pace once in a while. Usually, he doesn't need to eat as much as that of a human but Parad still enjoys getting to experience all of the different dishes humanity has to offer. As it is, Saturday nights tend to be their night out to different eateries— sometimes, even of different cultures too just to make it dynamic. He thinks it has a lot to do with Emu wanting him to have a broader experience with the life he has. It's something he's grateful for to be honest since Parad rarely ever eats anything beyond snacks in the years that he was separated from Emu. Most of the time, it was just things that were just enough to keep up his energy and nothing more since Parad never really saw the point of eating beyond that.

Which is kinda ironic since Parad is the better cook in their house; a fact that surprised Emu the first time Parad prepared Emu's lunch to bring for work until Parad reminded Emu that it had been _Parad_ who prepared their meals when they shared the same body since Emu had always hated cooking growing up.

Anyways, back to the point. Okonomiyaki.

"So good~!" He and Emu exclaim in unison, mouth full of their first bite.

After swallowing his morsel, Parad leans over the iron hotplate to poke his chopsticks at the okonomiyaki with a bemused grin. "It's still okonomiyaki, right? How can it taste so different?"

"Different prefectures always have different styles and people always said that Hiroshima style is one of the best for okonomiyaki," Emu explains as he takes another bite before closing his eyes in bliss. "They were right."

Following suit, Parad nods as he chews. "No doubt."

They eat and talk; laughing about one thing or another. And even after all this time, it always catches Parad by surprise of how easy they get along despite their past animosity. Sure, they're friends _now_, but he hadn't given Emu any reason to want to be friends with him before their alliance. Not that they'd been enemies anymore after their truce either, but being trusted allies was something that Parad thought would be as much as he was allowed to have with Emu.

But somehow after his resurrection, Emu refused to let him go and had even gone so far as to offer for them to live together which Parad eagerly accepted because c'mon, he finally got the chance to spend time with his childhood playmate!

As days go by, they've gotten to know each other better, enjoying themselves as they easily get along like puzzle pieces that seamlessly fit and have been friends ever since.

"Gochisousama~!" They both say, hands clapped together in thanks as they bow their heads.

With their stomachs full, they make their way to pay. However, before Parad can pay for his half, Emu reaches out to stop him.

"No," Emu states firmly when Parad blinks at his friend in confusion. "No, it's my treat."

Parad pauses, brows furrowing. "Emu—"

"Let me treat you," Emu insists, determined. "Especially since you're always the one that cooks for us."

"I cook for us because I like feeding you," he says. "And besides, you cook breakfast on occasion."

Emu snorts as he mutters ruefully. "Barely."

Which, fair, since Emu can cook rice and simple dishes usually in the steamed variety. But anything more complicated than that then, Emu is a bit of a disaster in the kitchen.

Parad tugs his bangs with a pout. "It really is fine, though. I mean, the ministry _does_ give me an allowance for helping them with the game disease research so I'm not exactly short on cash."

"Please?" Emu insists, flashing him the deadly combo that is the puppy dog eyes and one of those sweet smiles that he's starting to suspect that Emu reserves for Parad when he wants to convince him about something (like not torturing or at least, maiming the snobby elite doctors whenever they give Emu grief about being an intern), and Parad gives in with a put on sigh.

_"Fine..."_

Impossibly, Emu's smile brightens even more and pays for their meal with a triumphant air— as if he's done something worthwhile. Which is weird since he's paying for someone that doesn't need to eat all that much, if at all.

But well, if it makes Emu happy...

As they walk out of the restaurant and into the late autumn air, Parad resolves to make a quick stop by the supermarket when Emu is at work to buy ingredients for hamburger steak for tomorrow's dinner— it's only fair he'd cook Emu's favourite as thanks after all.


	4. Come here, let me fix it

**TIMELINE:** Post-canon; pre-relationship

* * *

**"Come here, let me fix it."**

* * *

It's his first conference and Emu is going to be late for it because he's somehow managed to strangle himself with his own tie.

Typical.

Hearing laughter behind him, Emu turns away from the mirror to find Parad leaning against the doorway of the bedroom as the bugster gives him an impish grin.

"Is that a new dress code? 'Cause I don't think it's working out for you, Emu."

Rolling his eyes, Emu tries to untangle his fingers from the complicated knot he's caught in. "Ha ha, very funny."

"You've never had any problems wearing a tie back in high school," Parad comments, pushing away from his spot to walk over to Emu, head already tilting in curiosity. "You're really that nervous, huh? I can feel it."

Shoulders slumping, Emu knows that it's no use in trying to hide anything from Parad (nor does he want to) so, he nods while grumbling at his tie. "I am."

"What about that press conference? The one before I came back, I mean."

"That's different." When his friend sends him a confused look, Emu elaborates. "That was in front of the media and I had Kyoutarou-sensei with me, so it wasn't so bad."

Parad rubs his head and Emu has to fight the urge to run a hand through those curls because they're always so fluffy. That, and it might calm Emu's nerves somewhat. "And speaking in front of the medical panels is...?"

"Way more terrifying," he confirms, finally managing to free his fingers.

Emu can see that his friend still doesn't really understand his predicament but, Parad nods slowly with a contemplative frown.

"Then...do you wanna fuse? That way, you won't be alone up on the stage."

And it's so tempting to accept the offer that Emu has been considering on asking himself because it's grown to be such a comfort in having Parad with him but in the end, Emu has to reluctantly decline.

"I appreciate it, Parad, but...I'm afraid it's something that I need to do on my own."

For a long moment, Parad looks searchingly at him before he huffs. "If you're sure."

"I'm sure." Stepping forward, he rests his forehead on Parad's shoulder with a sigh. "Thank you, though."

Parad runs a hand through Emu's hair before resting it on the back of Emu's neck as his thumb rubs comforting circles on his skin. "Anytime."

They stay like that for awhile longer before Emu reluctantly steps back and wonders if he should try his luck again with the tie or just forgo it all together. However, before he can turn back to the mirror, Parad stops him with a hand on his arm. Confused, he watches as Parad gives Emu a once over before his eyes finally settle on Emu's sad attempt of a tie.

"Come here," Parad says with a fond smile, eyes twinkling with his perpetual mischief. "Let me fix it."

Feeling embarrassed heat rising against his cheeks, Emu readily shuffles close and waits quietly as Parad arranges his tie. As the seconds roll by, his face finally cools and Emu watches as Parad ducks his head to make his task easier. Unbiddenly, he can feel his expression turning soft and tender for the best friend in front of him as he hums under his breath, those soft curls bouncing slightly as Parad nods his head along to a song that only he can hear. Straightening Emu's collar one last time, Parad nodded to himself.

"There," Parad straightens up after a few more moments, satisfied with his work. The bugster glances up and catches Emu's warm gaze, causing Parad to look away, even as he smiles. "All set," he finishes.

Placing his hands on Emu's shoulders, Parad guides him back towards the mirror, giving him full view of his attire and the tension that had unwind the moment Parad walked in comes back with a vengeance.

Oh, he's _so_ going to mess things up.

And Parad catches on immediately like Emu knows he would and he stares at their reflection as Parad pulls him into a hug from behind, hooking his chin on Emu's shoulder while pressing their cheeks together.

"You'll be fine, Emu." Parad gives him a reassuring squeeze around his waist. "I'll be nearby if you need me."

The relief at the promise almost makes him boneless and Emu leans back against Parad with a grateful sigh. "Thank you, Parad."

"Like I said: anytime." Stepping back, Parad extends a fist to him and glances meaningfully at a nearby clock. "We better go or those snobs will give you hell."

Catching the time, Emu groans aloud before quickly pulling himself together again. It's a good thing that he's gotten used to teleporting whenever he and Parad fuse together; it really cuts down the travel time in case of emergencies.

"Right." Knocking their fists together, Emu squares his shoulders and puts on a brave smile. Or as close to one considering his nerves are absolutely shot. "I'm gonna clear this with no continues!"

Grinning, his friend nods with a laugh as Parad's eyes glow red. "Now that's the spirit!"

As the familiar feeling of being merged with Parad settles within him, Emu thinks that the conference might turn out alright after all.


	5. I'll walk you home

**TIMELINE:** Post-canon: Parad is still under probation within CR— pre-relationship.

* * *

**"I'll walk you home."**

* * *

Humans are _weird_.

Parad is sitting with Poppy as they watch pandemonium unfolds before them.

"...Poppy?"

"Yes?"

Watching as the humans sing and dance, pints of beer in their hands, Parad shakes his head and feels mystified. "Humans are weird."

Beside him, Poppy lets out a giggle before she nods. "They are."

"What exactly are we celebrating here?" Taking a sip of his own beer, Parad peers down at the beverage; not understanding why anyone would make a big deal out of alcohol. Then again, Bugsters can't get drunk so that might have something to do with it.

Without warning he's glomped from the side by Nico, making him tumble into Poppy with a squawk.

"We're celebrating the fact that CR has new members, duh!" Nico hooks her chin on his shoulder with a grin. "Everyone's now a member of CR and it's awesome!"

After apologising to Poppy, he shrugs Nico off and gives the girl a flat look. "If you're drunk, I'm throwing you into the restaurant's pond, Nico."

"I'm 18!"

Poppy leans over from his side to give the other woman a stern glare. "Still under drinking age, Nico-chan!"

Nico pokes her tongue out at them and Parad takes the chance to reach over and squish Nico's face, examining the girl's eyes before letting go with a satisfied nod.

"She's sober," Parad reassures to a concerned Poppy who sighs in relief.

Nico pouts as she settles on his other side. "Like I'd get drunk before I'm of age. Taiga would nag me to my grave if I did."

"Aw, your future husband sounds pretty strict," he teases, nudging Nico with a snicker while Poppy giggles.

Nico elbows him which he dodges with a laugh. "Shut it, gremlin. And he's...just a stupid crush." Nico folds into herself as she looks away.

He and Poppy share a glance.

"Nothing wrong with a crush, Nico-chan," Poppy reassures, sending Nico a gentle smile.

Downing his beer in one gulp, Parad then snaps his fingers at Nico. "Poppy's right. Besides, crush or no, it shouldn't stop you from giving Snipe hell after all. Lots and _lots_ of it."

"You really like stirring up trouble, doncha?" Nico comments with a snort, mouth tugging into a smile.

Parad gives Nico a shark grin at that. "Yup!"

"Parad-kun!"

Glancing up, he finds a harried looking Director Kagami...who appears to be holding Emu by the back of his shirt collar like a misbehaved cat while the paediatrician smiles dopily at him.

"Please take Houjou-kun back to his apartment," the director pleads. "He's been challenging and betting against the other patrons with games and he—"

"Hasn't stopped winning?" Parad finishes with amused pride.

The director furiously nods his head as he despairs. "If this continues, he'll end up cleaning everyone out of their money!"

"How competitive _are_ you two?" Poppy mutters, giving him a look.

"Very," he and Nico answer, deadpanned before Nico points to Emu then at him.

"Trust me, Poppy, you haven't seen them at the height of their notoriety. The gaming world was collectively terrified whenever they were matched up against M." Nico grins as she puffs out her chest. "Except me, of course."

Parad barks out a laugh at that. "Like hell! You were shaking like a leaf at that Tekken tournament!"

"Was not!" Nico shrieks in indignation.

"Was too~!" Both he and Emu crow back before they share a grin.

Laughing, he gets up from his seat to gather Emu in his arms and turns to bow his head at Director Kagami; trying to remember his limited manners.

"I'll make sure to get him back safely, Kagami-inchou."

The director sighs in relief. "Please do. But since you're still under probation, please come back as soon as you can, Parad-kun."

Emu raises his head at that, giving the director a bleary glare. "Still?"

To his credit, Director Kagami appears apologetic. "I'm afraid so."

"But—"

Parad tightens his hold on Emu. "It's fine, Emu. The fact that I'm not locked up like Genm is a hell of a blessing already. 'Sides, it's not permanent."

When his friend? Partner? Ally? (Parad isn't sure what he and Emu are to be honest. It's only been a month since his resurrection after all) slumps into him with a petulant grumble, Parad turns away to hide a grin. It's a pity he missed a lot of Emu's medical school years (since he only shadowed Emu on certain occasions; wasn't too interested in medicine despite knowing the jargon). It would've been hysterical to see Emu mingling in goukon and such if this is how Emu was like when he's drunk.

"Since you're drunk, teleporting is out of the question. So..." Throwing one of Emu's arms over his shoulder, Parad holds onto the doctor. "C'mon, I'll walk you home."

"...don't have one," Emu mumbles as he stands on shaky feet and leaning heavily against Parad.

Poppy bounds over to fret over Emu; straightening his jacket and looping his bag onto his back. "What are you talking about, Emu? Of course you do!"

"Yeah and you're heading back there now," Nico says, smoothing out the bird's nest that Emu's hair has become throughout the night. "What? Did being drunk made you think you're homeless or something?"

Emu doesn't answer, hanging bonelessly against him. Then, without warning, images flash across his mind and while it's too fast and too incomprehensible for him to pick up, Parad still knows what they are.

Neglect. Empty house. Dead mother. Abandonment. The absence of that thrice damned Kiyonaga who dared calls himself a father.

Before it can go beyond that, Parad gently guides those memories back to Emu's side of their connection. Those memories have always been too private; too raw, and he knows that Emu won't appreciate it if they resurface and put on display for Parad to witness as well. Neither he nor Emu have a lot of conventional privacy when it comes to the bond between them and considering that he's barely made up for his mistakes; especially against Emu, he rather not push his luck and hurt Emu by his accidental trespassing.

"Ah!" Director Kagami exclaims, a fist against his palm. "Houjou-kun probably meant that he doesn't remember his address and Parad-kun has never been there before, so..."

Poppy secures a scarf around Emu's neck and looks up at him in concern. "Do you want me to write the address down for you, Parad?"

"It's fine," Parad reassures, rearranging his hold on Emu when the doctor lists to the side. "I know where it is."

Poppy's brows furrow in confusion. "You do?"

Wincing, he glances over to where Genm is...who seems to be just as roaring drunk as the other humans; raving in his cell. Lazer is much the same from the looks of it. Huh. Parad supposed that Bugsters who used to be human still have enough of their human DNA in their system to get inebriated.

"Yeah...well, Genm had all the basic info about the doctors; including their addresses. I was the one that usually checked on them for any updates."

Poppy hangs her head with a groan, pinching the bridge of her nose. "That Kuroto..."

"As if he wasn't creepy enough," Nico mutters.

Lips quirking into a smile, Parad makes his way to the exit with Emu in tow. "Anyway, we'll be heading out now." Reaching out, he raises Emu's wrist to wave at the others. "Say goodnight, Emu!"

Emu mumbles incoherently at his side while the girls giggle over him.

After saying their goodnights, they head on out.

"Whoa!"

When Emu tilts dangerously close to the roadside on the way, Parad thinks there might be a safer and quicker way to bring Emu back to his apartment than what they're doing now. Teleporting is out of the question since Emu isn't lucid and Parad doesn't know how teleporting will effect a drunk person. So maybe a piggyback ride?

"That might work...'scuse me, Emu."

Surprisingly, there's little to no protest from his former host as Emu easily climbs onto his back and wraps his arms around Parad's neck. Parad glances back though when Emu snuffles into his neck, as well as sensing a pinprick of awareness from the doctor.

"You awake?"

"...a bit," Emu mutters before he lets out a weary sigh. "Parad?"

"Hm?" Parad replies quietly, weaving between the crowd and studiously ignores the curious looks people sends their way for the odd picture he and Emu are surely making. It's a good thing he threw on the hood of Emu's jacket over the doctor's head before he carried him.

Emu lets out a shuddering sigh. "...you saw them? The memories?"

"Not on purpose," Parad reassures but falters when he feels a swell of shame from Emu. Wincing, he ducks his head. "Sorry."

Emu presses his face between Parad's shoulder blades and shakes his head. "I don't mind if it's you."

Snorting, he grimaces at his boots. "I think you're still drunk."

"Maybe," Emu agrees, laughter bubbling out before he arranges his arms around Parad's neck into a hug. "But I mean it, though."

"...Thanks." Smiling, he glances up at the night sky and idly wonders what the stars look like since the city lights make it too bright to see them. Parad wonders if he's allowed to know. "Emu?"

Emu nuzzles his neck. "Mmph?"

"Can I say something?" When he feels Emu nod against him, Parad takes a risk. "I don't think you need to worry about not having a home anymore."

There's a sense of confusion from the bond and Parad scrambles to get the words out.

"That is...uh..." He's never been good at comfort or reassurance— that's always been Emu, but he wants to try for his former host if for no one else. "Don't you humans have a saying? What was it again...ah!" Parad lights up when remembers. "Home is where the—"

"— heart is," Emu finishes, amusement colouring his voice.

"That's the one." Reaching a crossing, he waits for the light to turn green. "If home isn't a place for you, maybe it could be people? Like your friends in CR."

Seconds pass and the light turns green. As he walks on with the other pedestrians, Emu continues to stay silent despite Parad sensing the doctor is still awake.

"I'm overstepping, aren't I?" Ducking his head in shame, Parad looks away and wonders if there will come a time when he won't mess up with Emu. "Sorry."

"No," Emu denies, who sends a wave of remorse to him at his silence. "I think you might be right."

Parad blinks, surprised. "I am?"

"Yeah." There's a swell of warmth and affection from the bond; comforting in its presence. "And...I think I might've found that person too."

"Really? That's great!" Perking up, Parad tries to catch Emu's eyes over his shoulder but the human ducks his head. "Who is it?"

Laughing, the doctor shakes his head and hugs Parad tight, pressing their cheeks together. "I'll tell you once I'm sure."

The bond thrums like a heartbeat between them; filled with emotions and feelings that make Parad feels so safe that he wonders if it's okay to allow a sliver of hope to bloom in his heart.

"Yeah?"

"Yup." Emu shifts to smile against his jaw. "You'll be the first to know."

Chuckling, he leans their temples together. "Well, alright then."

Parad may not know what kind of relationship he and Emu have but he thinks that it's okay. They've got all the time in the world now to figure it out.


	6. Have a good day at work

**TIMELINE:** Post-canon: Parad is under house arrest after finishing his probation within CR; pre-relationship

* * *

**CULTURAL NOTES:** The phrase "Ittekimasu", is typically used when they are about to leave somewhere, mainly from home. The closest literal translation would be "I'll go and I'll come back" but a more natural translation would be "see you later".

The remaining people at home then replies the person leaving with an "Itterasshai". Literally meaning "please go and come back", the phrase is also close to a "see you later", "have a good day", or "take care" but none of those expressions truly express the spirit behind the word.

"Ittekimasu" expresses that "I will be going now but do not worry, I will safely return" while "Itterasshai" indicates that "You will be leaving soon but please do come back safely".

Basically, "Ittekimasu" is not a simple goodbye and should not be employed as such. It implies that you will return to the place you are leaving. Hence, the "Itterasshai" as a reply, implies that the other party would be waiting for your return.

***** So if anyone knows or has even read Mighty Novel X, that means you know about Emu's past. Taking that into consideration, I believe these expressions would really mean a lot to Emu.

* * *

**"Have a good day at work."**

* * *

"All of the emergency contacts are on the list by the fridge."

Tying his shoes by the genkan of his apartment, Emu tries to remember all the things he needs to confirm before he goes.

Leaning against a wall beside him, Parad nods with a faint smirk playing on his lips. "Got it."

"Snacks are fully stocked in the cupboard above the toaster."

"Uh-huh."

Shoes tied, he stands to shoulder his overnight bag. "I've bought groceries too, yesterday. Anything you might need is in the fridge."

"Okay."

"And I've put signs on the breaker in case there's a blackout and—"

"Emu." With laughter bright in his eyes, Parad places a finger on Emu's lips and leans close. "I'll be fine."

Huffing, he leans back and shrugs. "I know, I know. It's just...I'm going to be on call for the next 28 hours. I don't like leaving you alone for that long."

"I'm not gonna burn the apartment down, Emu," Parad jokes with a raised brow, crossing his bare arms.

Ever since Parad moved in with him, the bugster has grown to be more comfortable in dressing casually around Emu; like only wearing his blue shirt and purple pants whenever it's just them at their apartment for example. It makes Parad look soft and comforting and sleep warm.

It makes him look like home.

"Not the point," he jokes back, poking Parad on the nose which caused his friend to go cross-eyed before the bugster tries to bite his finger. Emu pulls back with a laugh before it petters out into a faint smile. "Still wish you could come with me though."

"Me too," Parad agrees, eyes softening. "But you know I'm still on house arrest."

"That's what I don't get!" Emu exclaims, throwing his arms up in frustration. "You've already finished your probation. Why is there even a need for a house arrest?"

Parad turns his head away with a wince, curling into himself as his features twist in guilt. "Well, considering the harm I caused, it's not a surprise that I'm still under watch."

More than anything, Emu hates seeing Parad trying to shrink into himself; like he thinks he's taking too much space. Or that he doesn't deserve any at all.

Reaching out, Emu cradles the side of Parad's face to guide him back so that their eyes meet. Emu then runs his thumb across a cheekbone with a reassuring smile. "You're not the same person you used to be. Neither of us are."

No matter what anyone says, Emu stands firm that he's as much to blame for the mess they were in. If he had handled things better; tried to understand why Parad had been fixated with him and reach out to him like he'd done for Kuroto— maybe they could've avoided so much hurt.

Maybe they could've been allies sooner.

If nothing else, Emu knows that it could've prevented him from having to strike Parad down as Muteki like he did.

(Despite the favourable outcome, Emu hates himself for what he did. Hates it even more that he caused Parad such terror. Hates it that Parad could forgive him for such a trauma so easily).

"You're not a danger to anyone anymore," Emu states firmly.

The corner of Parad's mouth quirks up into a faint smirk as tension bleeds out of his shoulders before he nuzzles into Emu's hand. "Except Genm."

"Except Kuroto-san," Emu agrees, mirroring the expression. "You really love annoying him, don't you?"

"It's fun!" Parad exclaims with a cheeky grin before sobering. "More importantly, you got everything you need?"

Emu pulls away to pat his overnight bag. "Yup."

"Console?"

"...that's the first thing you're asking?"

Parad shrugs. "Duh. You'd get bored if you don't have it with you to pass the long hours."

"True," he mutters then, pats the pocket of his jacket before he nods when he feels the familiar bulk. "Check."

"Change of clothes?"

Just in case, Emu unzips the bag. "Check."

"Snacks?"

"Check."

"Bento?"

"Check."

"Phone? Keys? Wallet?"

Emu pats himself down. "Check. Check and...check."

"Lanyard?"

"Che— wait." His eyes widen when he touches his bare neck. "Where's my lany—"

Parad extends a hand out and Emu sees the lanyard hanging on the bugster's wrist. Glancing up, he finds Parad giving him an impish smirk.

"It was by the coffee machine."

Emu feels his cheeks heating up in embarrassment at that. "...oh."

When Parad steps close, Emu ducks his head and feels Parad carefully looping the lanyard around Emu's neck. Raising his head up, Emu smiles at Parad in thanks.

Returning his smile, Parad brushes Emu's bangs away from his eyes. "Have a good day at work, Emu."

"Thanks, Parad." Walking over to the door, he turns to give his bugster a stern look. "Call if you need me for anything."

"Will do," Parad replies with a jaunty salute then, as Emu places a hand on the door handle, says softly. "Itterasshai."

And Emu freezes in place, hand gripping the handle with a white knuckled grip as a well of emotions washes over him. Slowly, he lets go of the door handle and turns to a concerned looking Parad. It makes Emu wonder what sort of expression he's wearing; wonders if he looks as overwhelmed as he's feeling.

It's the first time Emu has ever heard that word being addressed to him in his life.

Emu has someone to say that to him, now.

Someone dear. Someone precious.

Someone who's becoming more and more like home to him.

"Can you—" There's a lump in his throat and a burn behind his eyes. "Can you say that again, please?"

And Parad; who knows his history, who's been there right beside him through thick and thin for ten years without Emu realising it until much, much later—

Smiles.

It's different from the ones he usually sees; the cheeky grins and the impish smirks. This one however, is a smile; honest and sincere. It's warm and tender; soft at the edges with affection and adoration and speaks of _home._

And it's exclusively for _Emu._

Parad shuffles close and cups his face, bringing him forward to press a warm kiss on Emu's forehead with a tenderness that has tears streaming down his face. Then, his friend rests their foreheads together, gently wiping away the tears with his thumbs.

With that smile still on his lips, Parad murmurs in the spaces between them. "Itterasshai, Emu."

And for the first time in his life, Emu doesn't want to go to work. Wants to stay and not leave the person who is becoming more and more his home as each day passes by.

But he has to. He has responsibilities and Emu knows that Parad's house arrest isn't permanent and will soon be able to be with Emu wherever, whenever without consequences.

It's still hard though.

Letting out a shuddering sigh, Emu rests his hands on top of Parad's. Emu takes a moment to gather his bearings then, presses a kiss to Parad's palm before reluctantly stepping back to give his bugster a watery smile. "Ittekimasu, Parad."

As the door shuts behind him, Emu hopes that work will make the hours pass by faster because he wants to get back as soon as possible.

Emu has a home to come back to after all.


	7. I dreamt about you last night

**TIMELINE:** Post-canon: Parad is still under house arrest— pre-relationship

* * *

**"I dreamt about you last night."**

* * *

Emu stares at the bowl of rice in his hand while the other holds a pair of chopsticks akimbo. He's not sure for how long he's in a daze but it must be long enough to have Parad lean over the table to snap his fingers under Emu's nose.

Blinking awake, he stares up at the concerned looking bugster, his own breakfast left to the side as he gives Emu a concerned frown.

"Emu?" There's a grain of rice at the edge of Parad's mouth and something about it seems strangely nostalgic. "You okay?"

Somehow the scene in front of him makes the words tumble out of his mouth before Emu can stop them. "I dreamt about you last night."

"Oh?" To his credit, Parad doesn't look perturbed or annoyed at his non answer; merely curious as he tilts his head like an overgrown cat. "What was it about?"

Setting his breakfast down, Emu folds his arms on the table as he tries to recall. "I'm...not sure. Weird as this may sound but for some reason, it felt less like a dream and more like a memory."

He remembers waking up and lying in bed while staring up at the ceiling for a long time in an effort to chase after the vestiges of the dream. In the end, he had to drag himself out of bed when minutes past without success bar the afterimages of warmth and safety that felt too real to be just a dream that his subconscious conjured up.

"Really?" Parad eagerly leans over, breaking Emu out of his thoughts. "What kind of memory was it?"

Biting his lip, Emu shrugs as he taps his fingers on the table. "It's faint now but I saw us talking and playing with a gameboy...I think we were in middle school at the time...?"

"Hmmmm..." Folding his arms on the table, Parad rests his chin on top of them with a smile. "What else?"

Reaching over, he distractedly swipes the grain of rice from Parad's mouth before eating it and tries to remember more details to no avail. "Nothing much than that actually but...Parad?"

Parad blinks. "Yeah?"

"Do you think we might've known each other before the operation?"

Brows furrowing in thought, Parad leans back into his seat before crossing his arms with a sigh. "If we did, I sure as hell don't remember it but, I wouldn't deny the possibility. I mean, the operation Zaizen did on us was the first of its kind after all."

"So it wouldn't be far fetched to assume that something might've happened that time," Emu says, resting his cheek on a fist with a sigh.

Parad nods. "Seems like."

"And neither of us can confirm it."

"Nope!" Parad agrees with false cheer before sobering. "But this dream/memory thing...did it seemed like we were friends?"

For a long moment, Emu stares down at the table and tries to place the emotions that tinged his dream. It comes to him slowly but eventually he picks up fond affection curling at the edges of those pseudo memories. That realisation makes his lips turn up into a smile. "I think so."

"Were we—" Emu looks up when he hears Parad cuts himself off before his bugster shakes his head and gives him a hopeful look. "Were we happy, Emu?"

The dream itself is already fading from his mind but Emu can still hear the laughter; bright and filled with joy that chases after those ephemeral moments and the answer comes easy and wistful.

"Yes," he reassures, grinning at his best friend. "We were very happy, Parad."

Tension bleeds out of Parad's shoulders at that before he sways happily in his seat. "I'm glad."

"Me too," he agrees, picking up his meal again.

"...What about now though?"

Surprised, he glances up to find Parad staring at him with a bashful smile and Emu is struck on how it makes the bugster look younger than he is.

"Eh?"

"Are we happy?" Parad clarifies, smile widening enough that one of his sharp canines peeks out from the edge of his mouth.

The bond they share thrums like a comforting heartbeat between them; filled with all of the things that will forever keep them safe and warm.

And just like before, the answer comes easy as Emu hooks their ankles together under the table with an answering grin.

"Very happy."


	8. Take my seat

**TIMELINE:** Post-canon; established relationship.

* * *

**"Take my seat."**

* * *

Emu hates going back to the apartment in the mornings.

For long shifts, Emu tries to avoid landing himself on the ones at night because that would usually mean coming back bright and early in the morning. Which is not an ideal time to come back from the hospital since it's when everyone would be rushing to go to work and school; causing the trains to be uncomfortably packed and suffocating.

Doesn't help that Emu has a splitting headache after assisting two surgeries for paediatrics, along with operations for a mini outbreak of game disease. It's been the busiest shift he's had in a while.

"Emu."

Emu blinks to find that he's in his shared mind space and sees Parad across from him. Closing the distance between them, Parad reaches a hand out to cup his face and Emu sighs in relief at the familiar touch. Stumbling forward, he rests his head on Parad's shoulder and feels strong, lithe arms wrap securely around him.

"You're exhausted," Parad murmurs against his temple. "C'mon, take my seat."

A tired chuckle tumbles past his lips. "Keep telling you that my body is not a car, Parad."

"Of course not," Parad agrees with a snicker. "But you gotta admit that the joke never gets old. Hell, you do the same thing whenever you borrow _my_ body."

Emu laughs at that.

It took them both by surprise that Emu can possess Parad's body just as much as Parad can with Emu's. It's even more hilarious when Emu remembers _how_ exactly they found out that extension of their ability.

Raising his head up, Emu runs a hand through Parad's curls and admires how perpetually fluffy they are. Emu never understood how his senses can translate so well even when he's in his mind. But he appreciates it though since Parad's presence is something that Emu has grown to always want to feel with him.

"Have I ever told you that you remind me of an overgrown cat?" Emu asks his partner and best friend.

Parad bleps at him in response, impish smirk widening to reveal his sharp canines. "Nya~!"

Chuckling, he presses a kiss to those smirking lips before hiding his face in the crook of Parad's neck. "If you take over, it'll hurt you wouldn't it? My headache, I mean."

"Nah." Parad cards a hand through Emu's hair. "Things like headaches are something that's our own. Even if I take over, it'll only dull your headache for you."

"So it's something only medicine or sleep can help."

"Yup." Parad pulls back to cradle his face, thumbing the bags under Emu's eyes with exasperated fondness. "That's why, take my seat and get some sleep, ya workaholic. I'll make sure we'll get back safe."

Nuzzling into a palm, Emu gives Parad an amused look. "You hate rush hour just as much as I do."

"I do." Parad grins down at him, mischief bright in his dark eyes. "But I don't have a filter if someone annoys me so I can give 'em hell for any jackassery. That, and I can teleport us back. So."

"It takes more of your energy to teleport using my body, doesn't it?"

Parad shrugs. "We're gonna sleep once we're back so it's no big deal."

"I suppose," Emu mutters and when he glances up, he sees the stubborn look Parad is giving him. Knowing that Parad won't budge when it comes to ensuring that he gets his rest, Emu relents with a nod. "Alright."

Grinning, the bugster reels him in for an open mouthed kiss before leaning their foreheads together. "Good. Once we get off on the next stop, I'll teleport us back."

"Please do," Emu murmurs before letting himself fall into the comforting warmth.

The next time he's conscious, the bedroom is dark with the lights off and the curtains drawn. For a moment, Emu lies in bed blinking in the black. While his limbs still feel like lead because of the exhaustion, Emu is relieved to find that his headache is mostly gone. Turning his head, he spots Parad's sleeping face lying inches from his own. Usually, the bugster only needs a minimum of three hours of sleep a day; sometimes even less when the day is incident free. But since Parad has been with him right from the start until the end of Emu's very busy shift, it's not a surprise that even the Progenitor is tired. Smiling, he snuggles deeper into Parad's familiar embrace and takes in the humbling sight of the most important person in his life open and vulnerable in his arms.

Wearing the sweatpants and soft orange sweater he usually wears for bed, Parad's lips are slightly parted, breaths soft and even. When Emu reaches out to brush fingers through those soft curls, Parad only sighs and curls around him further with a soft murmur of contentment. The action makes Emu's heart expand in his chest like a balloon; one that threatens to burst when the bond thrums with warmth and adoration as Parad's subconscious reaches out to him.

_Emu._

It's just his name but even so, hearing and feeling the joy and love in Parad's voice just from sensing Emu's presence— all of a sudden it becomes very hard to breathe.

To be able to love Parad in every way possible there is to love a person— it's a blessing that Emu never thought he could ever have, but is forever grateful for all the same. So, he gathers every bit of himself; every bit of love and adoration he has for his partner and sends them all over to him through the bond.

_Parad._

Smile widening at the happy little hum Parad lets out, Emu burrows further into the bugster, tangling their legs together and pulling the covers up over them both more securely. Parad, for his part, hasn't even woken up, breaths puffing evenly over the skin of Emu's forehead. It's a sign of trust; being so vulnerable in each other's presence— a testament to how far they've come along since the time when all they knew was to use and be angry at each other.

What they have, it's hard-earned, precious, and it's something that Emu will never let go of. They've found what they were looking for in each other. After all they've been through; from being separated to being bitter enemies to sharing the same soul? Well, he thinks it's a pretty good time for them to take a backseat and get some much deserved rest.

Closing his eyes, Emu tucks his head under Parad's chin and pulls them closer before finally succumbing to sleep.


	9. I saved a piece for you

**TIMELINE:** Post-canon: Parad is still under house arrest; pre-relationship

* * *

**"I saved a piece for you."**

* * *

Weddings are kinda like mini reunions.

Emu has never been much of a social butterfly, but he's learned to be good with people over the years. The few friends he has are ones he keeps in touch with throughout the years long after graduation and today, one of those friends he made back in medical school is happily married to the love of her life.

"Emu-kun!" Katsuyama Mina greets him with a smile, looking beautiful in her wedding dress with her husband right by her side. "Thank you so much for being here."

Emu bows before returning the smile with an elated grin. "Congratulations, Mina-san."

"A friend?" The husbands asks, eyeing him curiously.

Mina nods, chuckling as she gestures to him. "This is Houjou Emu-kun. We were both studying to be paediatricans back in medical school." Then she turns to him while placing a hand on her husband's arm. "Emu-kun, this is my husband; Katsuyama Eijirou."

"Pleased to meet you," Eijirou greets him, bowing with a smile.

Bowing back, he shakes the man's hand. "A pleasure to meet you too."

As the reception continues, Emu nurses his champagne as he catches up with his other friends and classmates; marvelling at how much they've grown since they graduated from school almost two years ago. They're all doing their best to finish their internships so that one day they can make their mark within the medical world. While it's a slow process, Emu is happy to note that everyone is doing their best to realise their dreams and ambitions.

_'At least they're not the snobby kind,'_ Parad's voice whispers in his mind, causing Emu to bite back a smile.

It's become a habit but whenever there's a lull in conversations, he has a running commentary with Parad in his head. While he rather have Parad with him, Emu knows that with the house arrest still in effect for the bugster, that it's not possible at the moment. So, he contents himself by using their bond to exchange things between them. At times, they talk to each other while in others, they just share images and emotions.

Unsurprisingly, his habit has raised questions from those around him whenever he smiles or laughs out loud for no reason. Emu thinks that he may have made his former classmates think he's a weirdo but, well, Emu can't find himself to mind. Not when it's always so lively inside his head no matter where he is.

It makes him a bit homesick though.

When it's time for dessert, Emu blinks at the slice of strawberry shortcake that's placed in front of him and before he realises it, his hand shoots out to grab the server's wrist.

"...sir?"

Clearing his throat, Emu bows his head in apology at the startled server. "I'm sorry, but um...may I ask if it's possible to pack this up for me? I'd like to eat it at home, please."

"Understood, sir." The server takes his plate before gesturing to the cart beside her. "Would you like any refreshments instead?"

"Ah...tea, please."

As fun as it's been to see old faces again, Emu thinks it's about time for him to go home. That's why, once the clock strikes 9, he excuses himself and says his farewells to the newlyweds along with his friends and classmates with promises to catch up. After that, Emu quickly grabs the cake from one of the caterers and heads to the train station with an eager spring in his steps.

On the way, he takes care to keep thoughts about cakes or strawberries away from his mind. It's more fun to surprise Parad with the treat after all.

"Tadaima!" Emu calls out the moment he opens the door to his apartment.

A wave of pixels darts out of the living room before Emu is promptly engulfed in a warm hug as Parad nuzzles him; their bond flaring to life with _home, home, home._

"Okaeri," Parad greets back as Emu returns the hug. "Wedding must've been good if you're this happy. Didja meet a lot of your old friends or something?"

Humming, he rest his chin on Parad's collarbone and looks up at the bugster with a smile. "Yeah, it was fun. Did a lot of catching up too."

"Then why didn't you stay longer?" Parad asks, head tilted in curiosity as they sway slightly. "I mean, I've been feeling your excitement for awhile now so I'm wondering why you're back early if you were having such a good time."

Chuckling, he cards a hand through Parad's curls before showing the box to his partner. "While I did enjoy the wedding, it's not the reason why I'm excited right now. Wanna guess what's inside?"

"Food, definitely." Leaning close to the box, Parad takes a whiff and his eyes widen in delight. "Strawberries?"

"Strawberry shortcake," Emu clarifies with a nod. "I saved a piece for you. Well, for us technically since this was my piece that I asked to be brought back."

Blinking rapidly, Parad furrows his brows in worry. "You didn't have to go through that trouble for me. I wouldn't have minded if you ate it at the reception."

"I'd mind." Smoothing out the crease between Parad's eyes, Emu cups the back of the bugster's neck and rests their foreheads together. "I rather eat this with you than alone."

"You had to leave early though," Parad points out.

Emu shrugs. "I wanted to. While it was fun seeing everyone from medical school again, I rather come straight back home once dinner was over."

"Wait..." Parad gives him a surprised look. "So the reason why you were excited...it's because of _me?"_

Laughing, he pinches Parad's nose. "Duh! Why wouldn't I be excited to come home to you?" His eyes soften when Parad looks overwhelmed. Taking his best friend by the hand, Emu leads them further inside their apartment. "C'mon, lets eat. It might be a bit out of shape from the ride back but— woah!"

Hugging him from behind, Parad presses his face into Emu's neck. A beat before Parad lets out a trembling sigh. "...Me too."

"Hm?" Emu reaches up to pat Parad's head as he leans back into the embrace.

Parad pulls his head back enough to look at him, eyes bright. "My heart is always dancing with joy when I'm home— when I'm with you."

Now it's Emu's turn to feel overwhelmed; so much so that he can do nothing but hold the side of Parad's head to press a kiss on the bugster's cheek.

Home is something Emu didn't think he'd ever have. Growing up, there was never anything permanent for him; always moving around and never staying in one place long enough to even have friends. He'd have a roof over his head, sure but never a home. Always just a place to live in that's constantly empty and nothing more than that.

Not anymore. Not since Parad came into his life.

So he shifts until he can cradle Parad's face in his hands before leaning up to press a kiss to Parad's forehead just because he's allowed to; just because he can. And while he's still learning how to understand the bond, Emu tries to send all of the warmth and gratitude and adoration to this very precious person; hoping that Parad knows how much Emu cherishes him.

The smile on Parad's face shows that Emu may have succeeded in that.

Taking his home by the hand, Emu leads them to sit down by the low table in the living room to share a slice of crooked yet delicious strawberry shortcake between them; trading bites as they recount their night and bask in the simple yet irreplaceable feeling of being safe and loved.


	10. I'm sorry for your loss

**TIMELINE:** Post-canon; pre-relationship

* * *

**CULTURAL NOTES:**

*** Hakamairi:** Literally means grave visiting. A visit to a grave starts by cleaning the grave. After washing and purifying your hands, you collect water in a pail and head to the grave. After joining your hands in prayer, you pour the water onto the tombstone a little bit at a time and carefully wash the tombstone.

After cleaning the grave, you offer foods and fruits that the deceased enjoyed when they were alive. Flowers are also always placed at the grave. Chrysanthemum flowers are typically placed, but any flower the deceased liked may also be placed. After lighting a candle and offering incenses, you quietly join your hands in prayer.

* * *

**"I'm sorry for your loss."**

* * *

Grief has never been something Parad knows how to handle well, if at all.

It had been a constant fixture in the corner of his heart for six long years when he was separated from Emu. He was never allowed to process it or even recognise the ache that accompanied every beat of his heart until years down the line and by then, all he knew what to do with it was to lash out.

Because his grief has always been something he can never explain.

How could he? How could he explain grieving for someone who is still alive but doesn't remember him or that he himself barely recalls? How can a person hope to explain missing someone so much despite barely knowing them? How to even begin articulating the grief that was a noose around his neck when the knowledge of his very existence would kill his former host because he was that horrific; that _repulsive_ to him?

Inhale. Exhale.

Parad is fortunate though, being given the chance to understand and process that old grief. Blessed to know now that his existence is actually cherished; even precious to Emu.

However, despite the fact that he can recognise grief, Parad still doesn't know how to grieve the dead. Honestly, he didn't expect to be in a situation where those he cares about can die. He thought that as Bugsters, they were immortal and that they can have a long life with continues.

Parad knows better now and he's grateful despite the pain such a loss will cause.

Death is something he'll always be terrified of...but, he's also grateful to know that when it's time to go, he'll die as well just like everybody else.

Because more than dying, Parad is terrified of being left behind and alone.

"I wish you could see it too," Parad mutters to the makeshift grave decorated with tribal accessories within the wide clearing. "A life where Bugsters and Humans can live in peace. I mean...I know that you wanted to die the way you lived; as an enemy character but...I still wished you said yes to Poppy and I that time. Maybe Brave and Snipe would never forgive you but at least—" Parad breaks off when his throat closes up and a sob breaks past his lips as he pulls his knees up to hide his face. "At least you'd still be _alive_, Graphite."

The wind blows throughout the clearing and his curls dance along with it, as if a large hand is ruffling his hair; warm with its brotherly touch.

Parad isn't sure for how long he stays as he is but it must be long enough when he feels the air turning cool. Raising his head, Parad stares at the grave before tensing when he hears footsteps approaching before relaxing when he senses the familiar presence.

Turning, he finds Emu walking towards him with windswept hair and already in his civvies; showing that the doctor just got off from his shift.

"Hey," Emu greets him softly, eyes worried and reaches out to brush warm fingers against Parad's cheek. "I've been looking for you."

"Sorry," he croaks out and Emu's worry turns palpable within the bond. "I didn't expect to stay this long either." Parad gestures to the grave with a sardonic twist of his lips. "Guess I lost track of time."

There's a crunch of gravel as Emu comes closer before Parad is wrapped in a warm embrace. Blinking back the tears that threaten to fall, he lets Emu arrange their position until Parad is leaning back against Emu's chest with his head resting on a shoulder. Behind him, Emu wraps his arms around Parad's neck in a hug before he presses a kiss to his temple.

Parad rubs his burning eyes then, squeezes the doctor's wrist before burrowing himself within the safety of Emu's arms.

"I know it's not much, barely anything at all even, but..." Emu murmurs against his temple, remorse and sadness colouring the bond. "I _am_ sorry for your loss, Parad."

The words may not help ease the pain of grief but the sentiment certainly does, so Parad shuffles until he sits sideways to hide his face in the crook of Emu's neck.

"You don't have to force yourself to be here, Emu," he mumbles as he closes his eyes. "I know he was your enemy."

"He was more Hiiro-san's and Taiga-san's enemy than mine." Emu cards a hand through his curls. "Besides, it doesn't change the fact that he was your friend and what matters to you, matters to me too, Parad."

"Still..."

"And I'm not _forcing_ myself to be here," Emu states firmly, pulling back to so that he can catch Parad's gaze with a determined frown. "I'm right where I always want to be— with you; right by your side."

There's no lie in those eyes and the tears he tried to keep at bay falls as Parad finally lets the grief of losing a friend; someone who was a brother to Parad, wash over him.

"I don't know how to do this, Emu," he blubbers as he holds onto Emu. "I don't know how to grieve the dead."

"I can teach you if you like?" Emu offers as he cups Parad's face in his hands before he winces. "Although...I can't say I've always coped well with grief either."

Sniffling, he rubs his eyes with the edge of a sleeve. "Lazer and Poppy?"

Emu makes a sound of agreement as he tightens his hold on him.

"It was...difficult, losing them. Poppy more so than Kiriya-san since I'm closer to Poppy. But...as difficult as it was, the grief was something I could learn to cope," Emu explains before his face crumples. "But you—"

There's a flash of memories and the bond flares with raw pain and grief that paralyse him; as if something tore his heart out and left him bleeding. It leaves him just as quick as it came but, Parad recognises what it meant.

"When I lost you...I— I couldn't handle it at all," Emu reveals, voice trembling with so much pain that it makes Parad reach out to wipe a tear from Emu's cheek; heart aching when sees the haunted look in the doctor's eyes. "I...didn't know how to breathe right anymore when you— when you d-died."

"...Even though we only had a month together?" Parad whispers.

Emu lets out a dry chuckle at that and gives him a watery smile. "Goes to show how we were always meant to be by each other's side instead of enemies, I guess."

"Yeah," Parad agrees, bringing Emu's hand up to brush his lips against the human's knuckles. "Guess it does."

They stay like that until the sky turns into hues of fire, the rays of the sun glinting off the tribal pendants as if flames are dancing within them. Somehow, Parad can't help but find that quite fitting for someone like Graphite who embodied crimson fire.

"Do you have any of my memories of hakamairi?" Emu asks him in the silence, snapping Parad out of his daze.

Worried that Emu might be sore from holding him for so long, Parad shifts until they're sitting side by side; shoulders pressed together. "Grave visiting? To your mom's you mean?"

"Yeah," Emu answers, leaning his head on Parad's shoulder. The gesture makes him smile because it's always a comfort to know that Emu likes to be near him just as much as Parad does.

"It's more of a blur now." Parad glances down at Emu, brow raised. "Why?"

"Want me to show you how?" Emu asks, looking up at him as he gestures to the grave. "For Graphite?"

"...I'd like that," he says after a long moment in trying to swallow down the lump in his throat. "Thank you, Emu."

Emu pulls away, guiding Parad's head down to kiss his forehead before cradling his cheek with a warm smile.

"Anytime, Parad."


	11. You can have half

**TIMELINE:** Post-canon; pre-relationship

* * *

**"You can have half."**

* * *

"Are you alright?"

Emu looks on in concern when he sees Parad standing in the middle of the living room of their apartment; a small box of the bugster's belongings right by his feet. Since today is the day that Parad is finally moving in with him, Emu thought he'd be more excited.

Parad jumps slightly in surprise before he swivels to Emu and that's when he realises how lost his best friend looks at that moment.

"I...um," Parad stutters and that alone is alarming because Parad rarely ever _stutters_. The tall bugster then gestures to the apartment, forehead creasing. "I don't know how to do this, Emu."

Emu walks closer until he's standing in front of Parad before he takes one of Parad's hands into his own. "Do what?"

"Live like a human." Parad grasps his hand in a tight grip before it eases, shoulders hunching as he ducks his head. "I mean, I know that I need to make up for my sins—"

"Parad." Emu tilts Parad's chin up, eyes locking firmly. "I would _never_ ask you to be something you're not."

Shoulders slumping, Parad frowns. "Then what do you _want_ me to be?"

"I just want you to be _you_," he murmurs, shifting his hand up until he's cradling Parad's cheek.

Parad tilts his head and leans into his touch, brows furrowing in worry. "Even if I'm not human?"

"Yes," he says firmly, voice breaking no argument. "Just as long as you're Parad and no one else."

"But..." Eyes darting away, Parad bites his lip. "What if I don't exactly _know_ who I am anymore? I mean...at first, I thought fighting you was my purpose but I found out that wasn't right nor it's something I want anymore."

When Parad looks at him again, Emu feels his heart ache at the pained and haunted look in the bugster's eyes.

"I don't want to be an existence that hurts you ever again."

"And you're not like that, Parad." Emu intertwines their fingers together and gives Parad's hand a squeeze. "You're _not._"

Parad growls in frustration, his free hand ruffling his curls into disarray. "Then what _am_ I?"

"You're _**Parad**_." Taking a deep breath, he raises their clasped hands to rest it against his chest; right where his heart lies. "My partner. My best friend." Emu catches his bugster's gaze, determined and sincere. "You're someone very precious to me— arguably the most important person in my life even."

For a long, weighing moment, Parad stares unblinkingly at him before he clenches his eyes shut as a stray tear streams down his face. Letting out a shuddering sigh, Parad steps close and rest their foreheads together as the bond they share pulses with tender warmth.

"Thank you, Emu." Parad pulls back, smiling fondly at him with a bright sheen in his eyes. "You're the most important person in my life too." Reaching out, his bugster brushes Emu's bangs away with trembling fingers before they linger at his jaw. "My most favourite."

While he can see that some of the weight has lifted off from Parad's shoulders, Emu can still sense a certain thread of melancholy from his best friend.

"What's wrong?" Emu asks, voice nothing more than a whisper.

Parad blinks as he comes out of his daze before shrugging with a self-depreciating smile. "Doesn't seem fair that I'm always taking from you instead of giving."

"It's not taking," he mutters, flicking Parad's nose and watches in amusement when his partner lets out a yelp. "It's _having._"

At the pout Parad gives him, Emu laughs even as a particular thought crosses his mind— something that he's been thinking about for quite some time; ever since Parad was resurrected.

The thought or well, idea comes back to him with deliberate purpose. When Emu had time to think about it, he realised with a sinking heart that when he and Parad were torn apart, Parad lost a great deal of his old life; especially in terms of security and stability (being around Dan Kuroto for six years _cannot_ be a good influence, or a _healthy_ one at that). Emu may not remember much whenever Parad took over when they shared the same body, but Emu does know that there are habits and quirks, even interests that he used to have that were abruptly lost when Zaizen operated on them. Heck, some of the things he bought back then ended up carefully placed in storage because while he had no interest in those items, Emu somehow _knew_ they were important.

They used to share a life together. It feels...wrong, _horrible_ even, not to do so again. It feels like they can finally rebuild their life back together again after missing so many pieces for far too long.

So the idea comes and Emu wonders if he's allowed to ask.

Leading them to the couch, he sits and watches as Parad unpacks his scarce belongings. If it could even be said as such since it's just game cartridges and a familiar pair of black and magenta headphones.

"I always wondered where that went," he muses, pointing at the headphones.

Parad rubs his neck with a sheepish chuckle. "Sorry. I just wanted something of our past with me." His bugster extends the headphones to him with a wry grin. "Thought I should give it back to you now though since it was yours."

And that seals it.

"No." Placing a hand on top of Parad's, he smiles. "It's ours. Always has and always will be— just like everything else."

Parad raises a brow in question. "What do you mean?"

They've shared everything else between them (having their souls merged into one can do that), so what's the harm if there's more?

Clearing his throat, Emu folds his legs indian style on the couch and faces Parad, squaring his shoulders. "Um...I know I can't offer much but since you're starting a new chapter in your life, I was hoping that you can have half...that is, if you want?"

"Eh?" Blinking rapidly, Parad then squints at him as he unconsciously mirrors his position. "Half of what?"

Emu takes a deep breath, and lets it out. "Half of everything of mine."

Parad inclines his head, curious even as his lips quirk up in a faint smile. "...That sounds like a proposal."

"Well, aren't we technically married? Having our souls merged into one and all," he points out jokingly with a grin. "Isn't that where the whole 'you're me and I'm you' came to be?"

"...true," Parad eventually mumbles, cradling his chin in thought. "I guess that's one way of seeing it."

"So, what do you say?" Leaning forward, he offers a fist to Parad. "Together?"

Parad stares at him in thoughtful silence, as if he's at war with himself. Emu tries to decipher the complicated emotions within the bond; picking up tendrils of hope, guilt, and deep longing that are the brightest of them all. Aware of his clumsiness in using the bond still, it doesn't stop Emu from doing his best to send waves of reassurance and affection; his own deep longing echoing Parad's to an aching degree.

Finally, his best friend smiles and the tension eases out of his shoulders while their bond thrums with relief and joy.

Parad knocks their fists together with a laugh. "Together."

"Awesome!" Relief makes Emu intertwine their fingers as he smiles. "Now then...since you're all settled, what should we do next?"

Parad lets out a contemplative hum before a wide, mischievous grin takes over his face.

Uh oh...that never bodes well.

"Well, you _did_ say we're technically married..." Parad begins, rising to stand in front of him before he snaps his fingers.

There's a flash of pixels and Emu has to blink a few times to clear the spots in his eyes.

"What are you doi...ng?"

Forgoing his usual outfit, Parad stands in front of him in a shirt and jeans that are well worn and soft at the edges, an apron on his front with his curls tousled and sleep soft. The smile on Parad's lips is playful yet comforting with warm affection that leaves a soft, pleasant ache in Emu's heart as it gives a heavy thump.

Oh.

Oh, he's in _so_ much trouble.

Smile widening, Parad approaches him with slow grace and Emu can do nothing but stare as his best friend reaches out to cup Emu's cheek and coos softly.

"Since it's been a long day, what would you like first? Dinner? A bath? Or perhaps..." Abruptly, the bugster's smile and voice turn coy and seductive as he brushes his thumb across Emu's lips. "Me?"

Amused and flustered in equal measures, Emu grabs the couch cushion and lets it fly.

Parad ducks with a loud cackle and sprints away deeper into their apartment as Emu gives chase.

"Come back here, you gremlin!"

"Kyaaa~! Don't be so rough now, darling~!"

Emu has no idea what life has in store for the both of them but, he knows there won't ever be a dull moment with Parad at his side.


	12. Take my jacket, it's cold outside

**TIMELINE:** Post-canon; when Parad is still under probation within CR.

* * *

**"Take my jacket, it's cold outside."**

* * *

"I'll see you tomorrow."

Pausing his game, Parad tilts his head that's resting on the edge of the couch until his vision turns upside down and sees Emu standing behind him.

"Sure thing." Smiling up at his former host, Parad leans into Emu's hand when the doctor pats his head. His mouth tugs into a frown though when he spies an important article of clothing missing from Emu's person. "Wait, where's your jacket?"

"Ah..." Expression turning sheepish, Emu chuckles as he rubs his neck. "It got ruined in the fray when we went after that bugster."

Oh, yeah...that was a mess.

"In that case..." Putting his console aside, he shrugs out of his black coat and offers it to Emu. "Here."

Emu stares at him in surprise before he shakes his head, flustered. "Eh? I can't possibly—"

"Yeah, you can." Shaking the coat, he pins Emu with a stern glare. "C'mon, Emu."

Parad can sense a sliver of guilt from Emu as the doctor raises his hands. "It's a bit long—"

"Then I'll adjust it into a jacket," he says firmly, not giving an inch on this. To prove his point, his fingertips light up with pixels and he runs them along the line of the coat; shortening the length into that of a jacket. Satisfied, he nods and raises a brow to the wide eyed doctor.

"Now then...take my jacket, it's cold outside— especially since it's almost winter."

There's a stubborn twist on Emu's mouth but Parad will be damned if he lets Emu brave the weather with just a scarf.

Sensing that he's not going to win the argument, Emu takes the coat turned jacket with a wry smile. "Thank you, Parad."

"You're welcome." Once the doctor shrugs into the jacket, Parad hums and steps close to adjust the back of the collar to flare out into a hood. "Just in case if it gets too windy."

Emu plays with the purple straps hanging from the collar before smiling at Parad in thanks. "I'll make sure to return it tomorrow."

"Be sure that you do," he jokes, pointing to the jacket. "Because those USB cords are vintage, y'know?"

That surprises a laugh out of Emu and Parad follows shortly after, pleased at making the doctor laugh instead of crying out in pain for once.

Raising one of the magenta sleeves, Emu brings it close to give it a curious sniff. "Huh...it smells like you."

"Sorry...?" Parad mumbles sheepishly, voice lilting in question.

Honestly, he never thought that Bugsters even _have_ a scent. Parad wonders what he smells like...and hopes it's nothing unpleasant.

Catching his line of thought, Emu gives him a reassuring smile.

"Don't apologise, I really like your scent." As if realising his words, Emu looks away as an embarrassed flush chases across his cheeks despite the smile still on his lips before he mumbles into the high collar. "It's comforting."

Face heating up, Parad clears his throat and feels pleasantly warm. "I'm glad."

Despite the fact that Emu is pretty much set and ready to go, the intern remains where he is; shifting from one foot to another— hesitant to leave. To be fair, Parad is reluctant to see Emu go just as much.

It's been like this ever since his resurrection and subsequent probation within CR.

It worried Parad at first; how Emu is always the first to arrive and last to leave CR. Initially, he thought it's because Emu was pushing himself and becoming too much of a workaholic. But when he asked Poppy if Emu was working overtime; either with paperwork or checking on patients, he found out that Emu always checks out on time before coming down to CR. Eventually after much careful observations, he realised that the reason why Emu is so reluctant to leave the hospital is because of _Parad._

Director Kagami calls it separation anxiety. Honestly, it's something Parad can relate to since he's experiencing the exact same thing. And really, can anyone blame them? They've been apart for so long and missed out so much of each other's lives. It hurts that they've still got a ways to go even after all this time.

But as much as he'd like for Emu to stay, Parad knows it's not good for his friend's health or lifestyle if he doesn't go back to his apartment and rest. That's why with that thought in mind, Parad steers Emu to the elevator and gently pushes the doctor inside. However, Emu reaches out to cup the back of Parad's neck before he can step off and leans up to rest their foreheads together.

"Take care," Emu murmurs.

Parad smiles, brushing his fingers across Emu's jaw. "You too."

As he pulls away and steps back, Parad doesn't look away from Emu even when the elevator doors closed and cuts them off. As minutes pass, Parad lingers in front of the elevator for awhile longer before he makes his way back to the couch, flopping face first with a sigh.

He really hopes his probation will end soon.


	13. Sorry I'm late

**TIMELINE:** Post-canon; pre-relationship

* * *

**"Sorry I'm late."**

* * *

"Of all the days to be late," Emu mutters under his breath as he races down the halls of the hospital, tugging on his jacket. "Why did it have to be today!?"

A passing doctor calls out behind him. "Houjou-sensei! The files—"

Emu smacks his palms together in apology, jogging in place. "Sorry! Whatever it is, please leave it on my desk!"

"In a rush?" his colleague asks, visibly amused so Emu at least knows it's not an emergency.

He gives a frantic nod. "Very."

Before the other doctor can say anymore, Emu sprints away.

Despite how fast he's going, Emu surprisingly hasn't tripped or run into anything which he's grateful for because he doesn't want to be more late than he already is. Skidding to the entrance, he spots the familiar head of curls by one of the benches and he sighs in relief.

"Parad!" Emu calls out before he stumbles forward when his clumsiness finally kicks in at the last second. "Ack!"

A flash of pixels envelop him before he's caught by a pair of arms and he looks up to find Parad in his civvies smiling down at him, exasperated fondness in his eyes.

"Hey there, Emu."

"Hey," he greets back, righting himself and gives his friend an apologetic smile. "Sorry I'm late."

"It's fine," Parad reassures with a chuckle as he lets Emu go. "You didn't have to run, y'know. I wouldn't have mind waiting."

Emu shakes his head. "I've never really liked to make people wait. Besides, it's my first day off in weeks and we finally get to hang out! I don't want to waste any second of it."

"In that case," Parad murmurs, extending a fist to him with a delighted grin. "We better make every second count then."

Knocking their fists together, Emu mirrors his bugster's grin. "Let's."

Warmth settles in his bones as he and Parad merge together.

Red flashes across their vision before they smirk and vanish in an array of pixels; teleporting to a secluded alley nearby the city's arcade.

Once they've separated, they make their way inside and take in the flashing lights and colourful hulking machines that line the walls. It's not too crowded since school hasn't let out yet, which is perfect. Emu would like to play without anyone else interfering with all the fun he and Parad are going to have after all.

Emu rolls his neck and cracks his knuckles as excitement takes over. Turning to Parad, he sees his best friend doing the exact same thing with a wicked smirk on his face.

"So what do you say?" Emu asks, hand on his hip with a brow rising in challenge. "Are we gonna beat every single game here or aren't we?"

Parad cackles, sharp canines glinting in the flashing lights. "Ya need to ask?"

"Well then." Emu offers a palm with a grin. "Let's clear this—"

"—with no continues," Parad finishes, smacking Emu's palm with his own, smirking impishly.

True to their shared reputation, neither he nor Parad leaves a game unfinished. Or better yet, neither of them leaves a game without _winning_ them. They spend hours in the arcade; pushing tokens into slots, skipping the tutorial and normal modes, and go directly up to expert while wreaking absolute havoc.

It's the most fun he's had in _years_.

Don't get him wrong; Emu enjoys being a doctor— thrives in it even, despite the hardships that come along with it. However, as much as he enjoys it, there'd been this loneliness he couldn't shake no matter how hard he tried. On his day offs, he'd play games by himself as he always had; winning and losing on his own. It was fun, but it was never satisfying. At times, he played against online opponents and while he liked the challenge they posed, they were never really people he knows or can share the joy of playing together.

Poppy and Nico came the closest— playing games together with them is a lot different because they're his friends and he enjoys every moment he gets to spend time with them without worrying about some life threatening situation.

Despite that, Emu only realised what he's been missing in his life when he and Parad went up against Cronus for the first time together. From then on, it made him realise that even after all these years, Emu still found himself waiting for his Player 2— the one person who can play with _and_ against him; matching him move to move without holding back.

**GAME CLEAR!**

Emu throws a fist in the air while Parad lets out a loud whoop beside him before they share a high five, celebrating their 49th consecutive win.

While he's not sure, Emu thinks that he and Parad are scaring the attendants with their winning streak and how that in some games, they play it twice— in versus and co-op modes. The intensity of their winning streak attracts a large crowd as more people start trickling into the arcade, most of them high schoolers. They keep score of course, and it comes out even which is no surprise.

Light and euphoric, Emu leans against Parad as they sit on one of the arcade benches; catching a short break before they go in for the finale.

In the loud cacophony of the arcade with its flashing lights, he turns to rest his chin on Parad's shoulder and admires the bugster's profile. Sensing his gaze, Parad turns his face to him with lips quirking up into a lazy grin as one of his canines peeks out.

"Thank you, Parad," Emu murmurs in the space between them, hand catching one of Parad's own.

Emu doesn't clarify what exactly he's thanking Parad for and, to be honest, he's not sure of it himself either. All he knows is that he's grateful that Parad is with him and hopes his friend knows that.

The grin on Parad's lips softens into a smile before he leans down to press their foreheads together.

"No, Emu." They're close enough that they're breathing each other's air, to a point where Emu can almost feel Parad's words as if they're being said against his lips. "Thank _you_."

Eyes fluttering closed with a smile, Emu pulls back enough until he can rest his head on Parad's shoulder and feels Parad resting his own head against Emu's with a content sigh.

"That's gotta be our finale, right?" Parad asks after a lull, pointing to the DDR machine with his free hand.

Emu nods slightly. "Yeah, but let's wait for a little while. I'm comfy."

"Well, ain't that lucky," Parad whispers as he intertwines their fingers together. "So am I."

With their hands clasped between them, surrounded by sights and sounds Emu hasn't been able to enjoy with anyone else in a long time, Emu thinks that there really is no place he'd rather be.


	14. Can I have this dance?

**TIMELINE:** Post-canon; pre-relationship. This is also a continuation to "Sorry I'm late".

* * *

**"Can I have this dance?"**

* * *

All good things will eventually come to an end.

As much as Parad would like for the day out with Emu to last forever, he knows that'd be both unreasonable and impossible. Oh, well...at least they'll finish their game massacre off with a boom.

Dance Dance Revolution style.

The pop music is loud and booming in the arcade, with people crowding around the machine like a mob. Smirking, he looks at the crowd as they wait in anticipation for him and Emu to step onto the game. It takes him back to years ago when he and Emu were Genius Gamer M, and being surrounded by crowds of people cheering and screaming for them like they are now.

Emu is the first one to step onto the platform, token already between his fingers before he raises his head and their eyes meet. The doctor inclines his head to the game with a challenging smirk.

"Can I have this dance?" Emu asks, eyes bright with excitement.

Returning the smirk with his own, Parad steps onto the platform and readies a token for Player 2. "But of course."

Tokens in, they stand at ready as the din in the arcade gets louder.

Emu rolls his shoulders before he drawls out. "Ready to eat dust?"

"Ready to be left _in_ it?" Parad retorts, cracking his knuckles.

The song starts and they _move_.

As soon as his feet hit the floor, he's off, letting muscle memory take over. Hop, step, jump! His hands grip tightly at the metal bar behind him, driving his heels into the ground faster than he can think.

At a break in the music, Parad glances at the second screen, finding Emu at the same exact combo. A quick glance to the side and their eyes meet with identical feral grins. Neither he nor Emu ever miss one single arrow, and when a Freeze arrow gets on the screen, he stops and looks beside him to where Emu is frozen as well, chest heaving with his breathing after the insane combo they both scored.

His profile is highlighted by the dark red and purple of the machine, and there is something...otherworldly about him in perfect stillness. Sensing eyes on him, Emu turns his head and the grin on his face softens to something that Parad is starting to realise is especially for _him_.

And Parad can do nothing but smile back at the human who is his home.

Then the tail of the arrow hits the Step Zone and the moment is gone as they move to the beat. But considering how competitive they are, it's not exactly easy to determine a winner in a simple 'Versus' mode, so once they reach a stalemate, they switch to 'Battle'.

And, oh, how things take a turn. Parad has to wonder how those from the hospital would react if they can see how good Emu is in playing dirty just like Parad. It excites him that Emu never holds back on him as he throws modifiers his way, quickly picking up on the ones more likely to throw Parad out of his game.

Too can play it that way!

How thrilling that he never has to hold back against Emu either as the human matches him move to move; predicting and countering Parad with a grin on his face.

Minutes turn into an hour, and their scores are still the same. Parad observes his best friend and sees his movements are still clean and rhythmic; likely the result from countless battles as Ex-Aid. As he does a spin, Parad feels a tinge of delight when he spies the pure, absolute joy on his best friend's face.

Their troubled past and animosity made Parad think that he'd never be allowed to see that kind of expression on Emu's face. The fact that he _can_ though makes him feel incredibly humbled.

Once they clear 'Battle Mode', Parad stares at their scores that beat every single past high scores within the list by a mile with a smug smirk. Although, if they battle it out anymore than this, they might end up breaking the machine.

To his left, Emu leans against the bar behind him with a happy sigh. "Evenly match as always."

"Yup." Parad blinks when Emu reaches up to push Parad's sweaty curls away from his eyes. Leaning into the touch, Parad smiles when Emu's fingers linger at his jaw. "Wanna end it with a co-op?"

"Wouldn't want it in any other way," Emu says, grin lighting up his face.

At this point, the noise level within the arcade rises; almost to a deafening height as he and Emu get ready for their curtain call.

The beat comes in and the machine never had a freakin' _chance._

Synchronising their movements together has always been laughably easy even when they were enemies. In fact, trying _not_ to mirror each other is kinda like going against a waterfall; difficult and unnatural.

They jump and spin, colliding and coming together to bring out perfect combos; losing themselves to the beat. The sensation almost feels like how whenever he and Emu merge; not knowing nor even caring where they end or begin. It's the sort of synergy that Parad revels in as he burrows within the comfort, safety and freedom of _home_.

The song builds up to the climax, and all thoughts vanish; moving as one.

The arrows speed up, and both of them are practically flying. Their feet are blurs on the pads as they both let go of their tight grip on the railings behind their backs to meet each other in the middle so they can perform their finisher.

Hands clasped between them as their feet go through the motions for a moment before Parad wheels them around, switching their places on the surfaces— Emu's face lighting up in wonder as they move.

The crowd goes wild.

Parad shifts to have Emu flip over his back and land on the other pad perfectly. It's almost too easy, dancing with Emu as they fall into a routine that seems like it's choreographed, hands still linked as they perform more and more complicated passes, jumping over each other and flowing through the motions. The music thumps in their bodies as they dance with wild abandon.

Emu flips over to land in a split on the other side of the platform as Parad follows by dropping down to slide between his legs on the upswing, trading places again. And sure, Parad has a feeling they may look silly, but to hell with that when they're having a damn good time!

Beyond the music and the roaring crowd, one sound drowns out all the rest.

Emu is _laughing._

And it's not a modest chuckle or a stifled laugh. Emu is laughing, bright and happy and clear; the sound bursting from the doctor without restraint. The lights glitter on Emu's hair, his face lighting up with every movement, every breath. And Parad takes a moment to burn that image in his mind as his heart thumps in his ribcage at the aching joy that he feels.

Heart full, Parad lets his own laughter join in with Emu's and hopes; fervently _prays_ that such happiness will never be a stranger to Emu ever again— that his smile will forever come from a place of having a life lived full.

**PERFECT!**

A maniacal grin spreads across his face when Parad catches the score as he and Emu hit the panels for the final notes— a triple S; the highest points on the game.

He and Emu really are invincible together.

As the song comes to an end, the two of them stand in tableaux with one of his hands gripping the back of Emu's neck while Emu has a hand buried in Parad's hair. Their free arms are wrapped around each other's waists, pulling their fronts flushed against each other as their legs tangle to hit those last notes.

And they're left staring at each other with identical bright smiles on their lips; faces mere inches from one another as they breathe the same air.

They're so close and their bond thrums between them; beating in time with their hearts. It's like the rest of the world has ceased to exist, like all there is left is Parad and Emu. He thinks he could be content like this for the rest of his life; together with the person who shares his heart and soul— his very _home._

"Game clear," they murmur with their sweaty foreheads pressed close— close enough that their lips are almost touching as they share a laugh.

As he thought, only Emu can make his heart dance this way.


	15. I made your favourite

**TIMELINE:** Post-canon; pre-relationship

* * *

**"I made your favourite."**

* * *

It's his afternoon off today, and under normal circumstances, Emu would be outside somewhere with a console in his hands. Not this time. For the first time in a long while, Emu chose to spend the day at the supermarket, shopping for ingredients.

Anyone who knows his eating habits would be surprised that he's going out of his way to cook. But he wants to try. And while it's nothing too complicated (omurice topped with demi glaze, miso soup and salad for veggies), Emu is gonna give it his all because he's going to cook Parad's favourite dish for dinner tonight or so help him.

(To be honest, Emu did need all the help he can get since Parad is the better cook between the two of them after all).

Emu likes to think that he's gotten better over the years in eating healthy, more so in regards to being able to cook meals for himself even if just really simple ones like steamed vegetables or fish. Despite that, Emu is aware that he doesn't have much sense when it comes to cooking. So after he got permission from Director Kagami, he'd been secretly practicing in the hospital's kitchens whenever he's on his breaks for the past few weeks. Emu had to make sure to practice on days when Parad would be busy working at the Ministry though, so that Emu wouldn't give away what he's been doing.

(Emu doesn't think much on why he would go so far to cook Parad's favourite dish because as far as Emu is concerned, it's only a given that he'd do this much for his favourite person).

And that's how he found himself in the kitchen on his afternoon off donning an apron to prepare dinner; cooking chopsticks in his hand while all of his notes from the past few weeks opened and ready at a safe distance on the counter.

Hours pass and after some really close calls (particularly with the kitchen knife), Emu has two sets of omurice, miso soup and salad ready on the dining table.

Now, all he needs to do is clean up the kitchen and take a shower before—

"Tadaima~!"

Smacking a palm against his mouth to muffle the surprised scream that almost bursts out of him, Emu shoots a quick glance at a clock nearby and despairs that it took him longer than he thought to finish up.

"Emu?" Parad calls out from the entrance when Emu stays silent a little too long.

One of the downsides of living with a bugster is that there's no warning whatsoever when Parad comes back, since his best friend tends to just teleport into the apartment. It caused a number of jump scares for him, to Parad's ongoing amusement.

"Okaeri!" Emu answers back once his heart stopped trying to race out of his chest. "And I keep telling you to warn me when you teleport back!"

Parad laughs, coming to view at the living room as he shrugs out of his black coat and pendant before vanishing them into pixels. "Sorry, sorry. I forgot."

"That, or you just love teasing me," Emu grumbles, pushing sweaty bangs away from his forehead.

The wicked smirk Parad sends him is answer enough as his partner shuffles into the kitchen in his house slippers.

"That I do. Although, in my defence, I didn't expect you to be back ear...ly?" Parad stops by the kitchen counter, eyes widening when he notices the state Emu is in before his gaze darts to the messy stove then, to the dining table; brows almost hitting his hairline. "Emu, did you _cook?"_

Feeling shy, Emu rubs his neck with a nod and sees Parad blinking rapidly in surprise.

"But you _hate_ cooking," Parad points out, coming closer to take Emu's hands and carefully inspects them with a concerned frown.

"I don't _hate_ it," Emu corrects, smiling softly when Parad brushes his thumbs across the band-aids on Emu's fingers. "I just didn't see much point in it if there's more convenient ways to eat."

"Instant and microwavable food aren't exactly healthy, Emu," Parad deadpans, giving him a flat look. "Especially for a growing boy...or a doctor for that matter."

"I know." Neither of them bring up Kiyonaga; one of the main reasons why Emu couldn't be bothered with cooking in the first place. Instead, he focuses on reassuring Parad instead as he squeezes the bugster's hands with a smile. "I've fixed some of those habits in the six years we were separated."

"Still, you prefer to avoid cooking. So why would you—" Parad pauses before he squints at the dining table and pays closer attention to the meal. "Wait, is that...?"

The fact that Parad only realises what exactly that's waiting for him on the table after he was satisfied that Emu is relatively unharmed, amuses and flusters him to no end. It warms him to the core whenever he sees how Parad always prioritises Emu's welfare before anything else.

"Yeah," he says, giving Parad a side hug as Emu hooks his chin on the gaping bugster's shoulder with a grin. "I made your favourite."

"My favour— you _cooked_ for me?" Parad turns to stare incredulously down at him. "You...remembered my favourite dish?"

Grin softening into a smile, Emu nods. "It took me awhile to remember but...yeah, I do."

Memories of their shared past are few and far between for the both of them. Since they shared the same body before, their memories are almost the same but once they were separated, those memories became murkier and harder to remember the details of. It makes Emu wonder if he had been aware of Parad's existence in the past but the operation Zaizen performed on them may have caused Emu to forget.

It makes him sad to think that it might've been the case.

Their bond pulses and Emu can sense how touched Parad feels as his best friend looks at him with a bright sheen in his eyes.

"Emu..."

Embarrassed, he clears his throat and walks over to the table.

"I can't promise that it'll be good though. I mean I did practice over the weeks—" Emu starts to ramble and only realises his mistake when Parad turns to him so fast that if Parad was human, he would've given himself whiplash.

"Weeks!?" Parad exclaims, voice rising in surprise before he looks vaguely distressed. "You've been practicing for weeks and I didn't _notice?"_

Emu shrugs with a sheepish chuckle. "I was careful. Besides, since you've been keeping yourself busy in helping the Ministry with game disease whenever I'm at work, it wasn't too hard to keep mum."

"There's no way you could've done it here though. It would've been too obvious so...the kitchens at the hospital?" Parad guesses, hand on his chin as he steps up to the table.

Emu nods. "I asked permission."

"Why would you go that far for me?" Parad asks, mystified as he stares between Emu and their meal.

"Why not?" Crossing his arms over his chest, Emu raises a challenging brow at his partner. "It's not a chore to want to make you happy, Parad."

Because of how cruel and ignorant Parad used to be along with the fact that they were enemies, Parad carries a lot of guilt for their turbulent past. It unfortunately makes Parad believe that he doesn't deserve much happiness, if at all despite how hard Parad is trying to make up for his past sins. A lot of times, it's to a point that it catches Parad off guard whenever someone; Emu in particular, is kind to the bugster and wants to do something nice for him.

It pains him even more because Emu's past actions of ignoring and rejecting Parad made that belief even worse. Not for the first time, Emu wants to give his past self a good smack for hurting Parad so much.

"But wouldn't it be a waste on me? I mean, I'm someone who doesn't need to eat much. Even in Bugster standards, I rarely ever eat," Parad points out, brows furrowing.

"Doesn't mean you don't deserve good food," Emu states firmly before grimacing as he glances down at the meal. "Uh...edible food. Hopefully."

That pulls a smile out of Parad and Emu takes advantage of that opening, rounding the table to grab onto Parad's hand.

"I've tasted it, of course, just in case. And I think it tastes fine...I hope. I didn't pay too much attention since I was trying to get everything ready but, you don't have to force yourself if it tastes bad—"

"Emu, you _cooked_ for me," Parad cuts in, a finger pressed against Emu's lips as his smile widens into something bright and fond. "You; who hated cooking while growing up and still avoids it even now if given the choice, had gone out of your way to cook for _me_— there's no way in hell that I wouldn't eat it."

Cheeks heating up, Emu smiles as he tightens his fingers around Parad's, before leading them back to the kitchen to wash their hands.

Once seated, they clap their hands together in prayer. "Ittadikimasu."

Emu watches Parad expectantly as he takes his first bite of omurice, chewing slowly. "...how is it?"

"It tastes a lot better than you think, actually," Parad comments after he swallows.

"Really?" Emu stares at his bugster, frowning a little. While Parad is a good liar, the bugster has never lied to him since they became friends again because he simply hates lying to Emu. Looking at his face now, he can see that Parad isn't lying; merely thoughtful. "You don't need to hold back, I can take criticism."

"I'm not," Parad reassures, using his spoon to scoop some of his omurice and offers it to Emu. "It's a bit too salty but it's nothing that can't be fixed with practice."

Closing his mouth around the utensil, Emu finds that the taste is exactly as Parad said; a bit too salty but, otherwise it tastes fine. "Ah, you're right."

"Told ya," Parad teases, smirking with mischief bright in his eyes. "That was an indirect kiss by the way."

Emu pokes his tongue out with a grin, causing Parad to laugh.

They shared the same body for ten years, heck, they had their souls merged into one when they became allies— sharing utensils is nothing in comparison.

"Hey, Emu?" Looking up, he sees Parad resting his folded arms on the table as he leans forward. "Why don't we cook together from now on?"

Emu blinks in surprise. "What, like co-op?"

"Yup." There's a gleam in Parad's eyes; half impish and half fond. "After all, there's nothing you and I can't achieve together."

"We'd be invincible," he quotes Parad from all those months ago.

"Damn right," Parad agrees with a wicked smirk before bouncing in his seat as he brandishes his spoon to the air. "C'mon, it'll be fun! I can teach you what I know and we can even experiment all sorts of recipes too!"

Excitement infectious, Emu laughs fondly at his best friend and tries to be reasonable as he warns. "Our kitchen is gonna be a war zone, Parad."

"But it'll be fun~!" Parad singsongs with a pout, extending his hand to Emu and wiggling his fingers— and already Emu can feel himself caving.

He knows what Parad is doing and it makes him feel a swell of affection for this precious, impish creature in front of him.

Parad knows why Emu never bothered with cooking, knows his unhealthy eating habits when he was younger. Home-cooked meals were just a silly fantasy when he was a kid but...it's not like that anymore. Because here is someone who is offering him to make better, fonder memories of cooking— something that's warm and fresh and comforting instead of cold and empty and alone.

"Sure, I'd like that," Emu murmurs eventually when he can work through the lump in his throat. He then takes the proffered hand, squeezing it once and holds on tight. "I'd like that very much."


	16. It's okay I couldn't sleep anyway

**TIMELINE:** Post-canon; pre-relationship

* * *

**"It's okay. I couldn't sleep anyway."**

* * *

It's on him.

The screams, the struggles, the choked pleas to be spared; the desperate scrabble of limbs against the ground, the cries of those who didn't vanish immediately.

One by one by one.

At the time, Parad thought that maybe he should grant a quick, painless death to everyone, but he was no death god— he was only a bugster made out of a hollow heart and sharp yet brittle grins and—

— he is so _tired_.

Some days are better than others. Nights are always a struggle when he's left alone to his thoughts. Parad hates being left to drown in his head, but he doesn't stop it either and at times, he wonders if it can be a form of penance. Would that be arrogant of him?

Maybe. Maybe not.

...Who knows?

It hurts. It's heavy.

When he's left alone with only his sins for company, it feels like a slow, agonizing wait for the end—

Damn it all.

His life is a study of mistakes; his hands destroy, tragedy follows every step he took, and everytime he closes his eyes, the guilt and shame and desperation and the gut-wrenching sadness wash over him.

In those times, Parad takes care to muffle the bond so as to not burden or worry Emu with the weight of his sins.

True, he may have stopped Gamedeus, died a second time to at least make up for his deeds, if only a little. He's finished his probation and house arrest. Is currently helping CR and the Ministry in their game disease research but—

Is that even enough?

...Will it ever be?

_'It's worth it, right?'_ Hands gripping his head, he rests his forehead on the balcony railing with a sigh. _'I shouldn't hope for anyone's forgiveness. I mean, I know I won't get it nor do I deserve it but...I want it, please.'_

Letting out a hollow laugh, his mouth twists.

"How selfish," he mutters into the quiet night. "Dammit. I just want everything to be alright."

"It will be."

Stifling a shout, Parad snaps around to find Emu at the doorway of their balcony. The intern is wearing a hoodie over his Mighty pyjamas as he pads over to Parad in outdoor sandals.

Guilt washes over him; thinking that he didn't muffle the bond as well as he thought.

"Sorry," he whispers, wrapping an arm around his best friend to help stave off the brisk winds of the night. "Did I wake you?"

Emu shakes his head, snuggling into Parad's side as he winds an arm around his waist.

"It's okay," Emu reassures with that gentle smile of his, running his thumb in comforting circles against Parad's hip. "I couldn't sleep anyway."

Peering down at the way Emu's eyes are still wide and alert despite the late hour, Parad feels a sliver of worry at the unusual bout of insomnia.

"How come?"

Emu hums, tightening his hold on him and turns to give him a stern frown. "I hate it when you muffle the bond."

"...you can tell the difference now?"

"Hard not to," Emu says dryly. "It feels like having wool pulled over me. Comfy but obscuring. It's how I know that you're being considerate of me."

Parad looks away, heat crawling up his neck. "I didn't want to trouble you."

_I don't want to be a burden to you,_ goes unsaid.

"You're not a burden," Emu states firmly, the indignation in his eyes a flare in the cool night. Parad can sense a tug from the bond and knows that he can no longer muffle his stray thoughts. "For that matter, trouble me. I _want_ you to trouble me."

The wind blows at that moment and he tucks Emu under his chin, trading warmth and lets the wind fills the space instead of words.

Parad remembers when the hours turned late and he was alone with his thoughts; the darkness around him thick and unyielding, made all the more apparent when juxtaposed against the lonely city lights in the distance as he stood at the balcony and it had seemed so impossibly far away. He remembers feeling very, very small.

He remembers feeling very, very tired.

And how can he ever think on letting those thoughts drag Emu down too? It's enough that only Parad has to waddle through them and drown.

The bond spikes before the world suddenly tilts and he's on his back on Emu's bed while the doctor pins him down. It takes him a moment to realise that Emu teleported them (an ability Emu has since developed for being Patient Zero) and by then, Emu is straddling him with their faces only mere inches from one another.

The flare in those eyes is a roaring inferno now and Parad lets himself get caught in the flames— he knows he won't burn.

There's no exchange of words— just emotions; pure and raw as the bond spirals and crashes and rises amidst the beating of their hearts. Submerging themselves completely into the bond is not something they do often because of the unrivalled intensity that they'd experience as their minds and hearts merge into the singularity. It's to be completely vulnerable and at each others mercy; something that can't be done without complete trust in each other and the fact that it's _Emu_ who instigated it shows how far they've gotten since they were enemies.

Unrestrained; he feels every bit of Emu's emotions as well as his own. Their fears of losing the other. The desire to unapologetically stand by the other's side. The sadness of seeing the other in pain. The yearning to have the other happy and safe and _home._

Two bodies. Two hearts. Two minds.

One soul.

They separate and left gasping for breath. There are tears streaming down his face and when blinks up, Parad can see that Emu is much the same; a warm comfortable weight on him as they settle back into themselves.

"One day," he whispers, raising a trembling hand to wipe away the tears in Emu's eyes. "I'll be strong enough to carry my sins on my own."

Forehead creasing, Emu shifts until he's cradling Parad's face in his hands. "Parad..."

He can hear the warning; the plea and he gets it now. He _does_. But it's still something he rather not burden Emu with.

"It's not fair to you or anyone for that matter if you share the burden of my sins, Emu," he reasons, thumb brushing across a cheekbone and catches a stray tear.

"It's what I want," Emu protests, a stubborn tick in his jaw. "I don't just want to share the good things with you, Parad, but the bad things too."

"I know you feel responsible for me—"

"I _did_." While the fire is banked, the embers are still steadily flickering in those unwavering eyes and chasing away every chill that suffused him. "Initially, that's why I said about making up for your sins together but, it's not like that anymore. Not for a long time now."

"Then, why...?"

"Because I _care_ about you, you incorrigible imp! S_o much _that it physically _hurts_ me to see you in pain," Emu growls out and the bond flares up to prove his point. "I don't want you to go through life alone." Tension easing out, Emu sighs and leans his forehead against his. "If possible, I want to be by your side every step of the way."

"I want that too, more than anything," he chokes out as he wraps his arms around Emu. "I just thought that...I need to be someone who deserves to be at your side first, y'know?"

"You've already proven yourself a long time ago, Parad," Emu mumbles against his neck, returning the hug. "I _want_ you here with me."

Parad sighs, staring up at the ceiling. "I feel like I should be doing _more_."

"What you're doing now is more than enough." Emu pulls away from his neck to pin him with an earnest gaze and Parad can feel Emu using their bond to amplify his sincerity. "_You_ are enough."

And he caves because how can he deny _Emu_ in the face of such trust and faith? Parad knows that Emu won't hesitate to plunge them into the bond again if it means helping Parad understand the depth of his devotion— knows if they go under again as he is now, he'll come undone.

Taking a deep breath, he nods and feels himself go breathless at the smile Emu gives him; warm and tender with all the things that makes Houjou Emu his one and only.

Who's he kidding? Parad came undone a _long_ time ago.

It's moments like these when they're so close; when they're at their most vulnerable and real that Parad has to shut his eyes because of how much he wants to bridge the gap between them and just kiss Emu until they're both breathless.

But he's still...he can't—

"Yes, you _can_."

Without warning, Parad feels the turtleneck of his sweater being pulled up to cover his mouth. Snapping his eyes opened, Parad sees Emu smiling at him; sweet and bashful before he tilts his head to press their lips together in a kiss.

He inhales in surprise and stares at the opened, challenging gaze of his partner.

Despite the clothed barrier between their mouths, Parad can still feel the shape and warmth of Emu's lips against his own. There's a hand against his jaw and he can feel Emu slowly, gently tugging the turtleneck down with a question in his eyes.

And he wants to. Oh, how he wants to just tear down every single barrier between them.

It's not even a physical need or even that of lust—

It's just what _is._

Because what they have goes beyond every single level of intimacy that nothing physical or otherwise can ever compare. It goes beyond lust or romance or whatever synonym to those things that trying to even put it into words will only just give Parad a headache.

How can he even begin to describe something that is beyond his very identity— of a bond; of a love that is beyond definition itself?

His heart. His soul. His everything. His home.

His Emu.

Hand shooting up to wrap around Emu's wrist, Parad takes a shuddering breath and shakes his head. "...Not yet."

For a long, weighing moment, Emu stares at him with that unflinching gaze before his eyes soften in understanding.

"Not yet," Emu agrees and rolls off to flop beside him.

But the doctor doesn't go far as Emu wraps Parad in an embrace that he can't hope to escape...not that Parad wants to, of course. Once satisfied, Emu snuggles into the crook of his neck and sighs in content.

Smiling, he tugs the turtleneck back down and shifts until he can wrap his arm around Emu's shoulders to bring them closer still.

"Parad."

"Hm?"

"One day," Emu begins, hand above Parad's heart. "One day, kiss me with everything we are— kiss me with no end and no beginning."

_'It's the same for me too,'_ Emu whispers within their bond. '_My heart. My soul. My everything. My home_.'

_'My **Parad**.'_

And he lets out a sob.

"I will," Parad promises once he can work through the lump in his throat, throwing an arm across his burning eyes.

There are drops of warm tears on his skin as Emu kisses his jaw. "Together?"

Shifting until he has Emu tucked under his chin, Parad brings them close and clasps one of their hands together that lay between them; right above their synchronised hearts. Vanishing their sandals back to the balcony, he tangles their legs together. Parad then uses his telekinesis to drag the comforter over them and presses a kiss on Emu's forehead.

"Together."


	17. Watch your step

**TIMELINE:** Post-canon; established relationship

* * *

**"Watch your step."**

* * *

It started out as a cry for attention; a way out of his loneliness.

Emu never started out to be as clumsy as he is now. If anything, he was normal. But when he was a kid, Emu wanted to be away from his empty house; to be around people that actually cared that he _existed_. So he found every excuse he could think of to visit the hospital and somehow along the way, he became less careful with himself. Tripping over his feet, walking into things, a cut, a bruise, a bump. Anything to be around the kind and caring hospital staffs.

_Anything_ to get away from an empty house.

Back then, he thought that if he went to the hospital enough times, maybe Kiyonaga would remember that he had a son. Emu stopped trying though when that man had only came by to berate him for being admitted into the hospital for pneumonia. It was the first and last time he saw Kiyonaga in his childhood.

Emu didn't start out clumsy.

It became a _habit._

"Ack!"

Arms windmilling, he braces himself for the impact—

— only to feel a wave of pixels surrounding him as a pair of arms catches him in a familiar embrace.

Hands bracing on strong biceps, Emu blinks in surprise and looks up to find Parad giving him a look of fond exasperation.

"Watch your step," Parad murmurs, the arms around Emu's waist a steel band with a promise to never let Emu fall ever again. It's a promise that Emu sees being fulfilled every single day since their alliance— both in battles and in life.

_Please be more careful with yourself._

Parad leans down to rest their foreheads together with a plea in his eyes.

_You should **never** need to get hurt just to get people to care._

Emu takes a shuddering breath, and lets it out slowly as he cradles Parad's face, one hand tracing the contours of his bugster's features.

His mind flashes to the people in his life now and the fact that they didn't leave despite the rocky start he had with some of them; Parad being one of them. And that despite the _really_ rocky reunion they had, Parad is still here and Emu knows that the bugster won't ever leave— that what they have is forever.

_It's different now. None of them are like Kiyonaga_—_ so please, believe that things are better now._

They sway in their living room, fronts flushed against each other as Emu feels the burden that's been haunting him since his childhood starting to finally fall away from his shoulders. The relief makes his eyes water and Emu closes them with a soft sigh.

_You will **never** be alone again, Emu._

Eyes fluttering opened, Emu smiles and leans up to press a lingering kiss on Parad's lips. His smile widens as Parad deepens the kiss before a laugh bubbles out when Parad uses the bond to wrap them further into each other. Once they pull back, he then tucks himself under Parad's chin to envelop his partner into a hug. Those arms that guard him so fiercely come up to cradle him as if he's someone precious— someone _worth staying for._

Emu thinks that it's alright now to allow himself to believe the truth he never thought he could ever have.

_Watch your step._

"I will," Emu promises and looks up to take in the smile that lights up Parad's face as he relaxes.

"Let's make sure that you do," Parad murmurs, brushing Emu's bangs away from his eyes.

He looks on in confusion when Parad leads them into the middle of their living room. Curious but staying quiet, he watches as Parad waves a hand at the space before suddenly the lights dim whilst the stereo begins to play. The soft strains of music fill their apartment and Emu breathes out a laugh.

Lips kicking up into an inviting grin, Parad bows before extending a hand to him.

Warmth chases across his cheeks and feeling helplessly charmed, Emu takes it with a light heart and a bright grin.

Stepping close, he twines his arms around Parad's neck as the bugster holds him firmly by the waist. They move into a slow dance; steps light and easy with Parad leading Emu carefully so that they don't knock into any of their furniture, and delighting in Emu following his lead with steps that Emu puts more care into than he has in years.

Emu doesn't have much trouble in dancing, but that's usually when it's in a game context. Now that Emu thinks about it, it's the same with everything else too. Because the goal is to score the most points in games, Emu tends to pay more attention to how he should move or where he needs to be at. Anything outside of it? Emu becomes a bit more careless; less mindful of his limbs and surroundings. It's not good practice, he knows. But he's grown used to it over the years that he's forgotten how _not_ to be careless with himself or his general well being.

There's no room for that anymore though; even if it may take time.

As they dance, there are time when he still trips and at times, he even manages to lead. Through it all, Parad's hold on him doesn't waver. Minutes pass and Emu stops trying to watch his feet but is still careful of the steps he takes. Instead, he pays more attention to the gleam of Parad's hair in the dim light, the way his smile is soft, the love in his eyes, and the warmth of his body against Emu's.

Although it may take awhile and that it may be complicated but, it's time to let go all of the crippling things that aren't worth holding onto.

Emu is breaking the habit; one step at a time.


	18. Here, drink this You'll feel better

**TIMELINE:** Post-rooftop scene from Episode 40

* * *

**"Here, drink this. You'll feel better."**

* * *

Parad sits outside at a secluded spot underneath a large tree within the hospital courtyard.

It's comfy and quiet

...peaceful.

The wooden bench under him is sun-warmed and old, smooth against his fingertips. Overhead, the leaves sway and rustle; an accent to the winds. Tilting his head up, Parad stares at the sunbeams filtering through the leaves and counts the seconds each breath takes, wondering, if he takes longer between each breath, how much it will take to fall unconscious.

How much will it take for him to drown again?

Closing his eyes, Parad sighs a breath out and waits as long as his body allows until he takes the next.

From one breath to the next, he hears the footsteps. They are hesitant but determined and when they stop next to him, he doesn't have to open his eyes to know who it is. Parad remains quiet and breathes out slowly.

Parad hears the rustle of clothing, feels a weight settling next to him and the warmth of a shoulder near his. Opening his eyes, he turns away from the trees to look to his side; finding Emu holding a flask in his hands.

The cold indifference is gone, replaced with compassion and hesitant concern as Emu offers him the flask.

"Here, drink this," Emu says softly, the kindness in his voice is almost like a physical blow. "You'll feel better."

How can this human be so kind to him after all that Parad has done? Is it a ploy to help him against Cronus? Is it pity?

All of the above?

In a daze, he blinks and slowly takes the proffered beverage with trembling fingers. When it gets so bad that he's worried he might drop the thing, Emu closes his hands around his in a gentle grip. It takes a couple of seconds until Parad is confident that he won't drop the flask and when he's sure, he pulls it to him and watches as Emu's hands fall away— taking the warmth with him.

"Thanks," he whispers, throat feeling like sandpaper. When he peers down at the flask, Parad is surprised to see that it's filled with hot chocolate topped with a generous amount of whipped cream and cinnamon. It's his favourite drink. However, it's not something Emu should know about after their separation. "Did you...make this?"

Emu nods, staring ahead as he fiddles with the sleeve of his doctor's coat. "Yeah. The break room in Seito is pretty stocked so it wasn't hard."

"How...?"

Emu glances at him, curious. "Hm?"

Parad wets his lips, tapping a finger against the flask. "How did you know that I like my hot chocolate this way? Or that I like hot chocolate at all?"

There's no reply for awhile and in the silence, the rhythm of their breaths, he notices, is starting to match. He feels Emu taking a long, slow breath in and lets it out.

"I'm not sure," Emu admits, thoughtful and maybe even wistful as he folds his hands on his lap. "It just felt..._right_."

Parad hums and doesn't look a gift horse in the mouth, taking a sip of the hot beverage and finds nothing out of the ordinary before he takes a larger swallow and sighs at the taste and fragrance. It warms him; reminds him of distant halcyon days that he can barely recall now. "You always did make the best drinks."

Though the memories are hazy, Parad remembers that Emu used to work part-time as a barista back in their high school days. If the human hadn't been so hellbent on becoming a doctor, Emu could've made a career as a barista almost as much as that of a pro gamer; good as he was.

"Gotta make up for my lack of cooking skills somehow," Emu jokes, sending him a tentative grin.

And Parad can do nothing but return it; feeling the knot in his stomach unwinding at the lack of ulterior motive in that simple gesture. He may not know how long this truce will last but, he's gonna cherish every second of it.

"I'm sorry."

Snapping out of his thoughts, Parad blinks to see that Emu is bowing low to him in his seat, hands gripping his knees until the knuckles turn white.

Mind racing, Parad is momentarily confused at the sudden apology; trying to recall why _Emu_ of all people would need to apologise until the recent memory of Muteki flashes by from the bond he shares with the doctor.

Oh.

Trying to stifle a bout of hysteria, Parad looks away as his grip on the flask tightens. "For what? I got the ending I deserved."

From the corner of his eye, he sees Emu flinching hard in his seat and raises his head; eyes bright with remorse.

"No, not an ending," Emu corrects quietly, a hand resting cautiously on Parad's arm. "A restart."

Tensing at the unexpected touch, Parad forces himself to relax when he realises that it's not a touch out to hurt; only to comfort. "I guess...still, why would you need to apologise though?

"Because I hurt you," Emu murmurs, the guilt and regret palpable even without the bond telling him so. "More than once, I've hurt you."

A bark of hysterical laughter bursts out before he can stop it. "I don't know if you noticed this, Emu, but I hurt you too. Many times." Shoulders slumping, he covers Emu's hand and grips it tight. "You did what was necessary."

There's a sharp intake of breath before Emu grips his chin to lock their gazes and Parad is dumbfounded at the sheer vehemence in Emu's eyes.

"Just because it was _necessary_ doesn't mean it was _right_," Emu states firmly before his features twist in pain and shame. "It was...cruel to make you understand that way. Especially after how I ignored you so many times."

His mouth tries to quirk up into a sardonic smirk but ends up in a grimace. "I've done far worse."

"Maybe." Emu releases his chin with a sigh, compassion and remorse unwavering. "I'm still sorry, Parad."

His vision swims, a lump in his throat as Parad tries not to fall apart by the seams at the genuine good will of his former host.

"Me too," Parad whispers eventually, a stray tear streaming down his face and feels Emu wiping it away with his thumb and Parad folds into himself, gripping white clad shoulders as gut-wrenching guilt and shame wash over him. "I'm so sorry for hurting you, Emu— for _everything_."

A hand grips the back of his neck, gently pushing him down to rest his forehead against Emu's and Parad blinks away the tears to see that the intern is smiling at him.

"I know," Emu says, eyes softening and catching the sunlight; warm and chasing away the cold. Tilting his head away, a determined glint settles in his gaze. "Let's change our fate together this time."

Parad closes his eyes, taking a deep breath and when he opens them again, Emu is still looking at him with a warm smile, his fist held out.

Returning the smile with one that feels far more real than all those in the past, he knocks their fists together. "Let's."


	19. Can I hold your hand?

**TIMELINE:** Post-canon; pre-relationship

* * *

**"Can I hold your hand?"**

* * *

Emu thinks that hands are an amazing part of the human body.

They can heal as much as they can hurt; can save as much as they can destroy. Emu has seen hands that belong to all sorts of people from countless walks of life. Some make food, others build skyscrapers. There are those that catch criminals and—

— there are those that kill.

Emu has done much with the hands he was born with. A majority of it of course, has been divided evenly between playing games and saving lives. The former is a pure, simple joy while the latter is a bone deep desire to help. As such, Emu hopes that he has used them well and that for all of his faults, he still managed to help and save lives. But like many others, there are times when he used his hands for things he's not proud of; times when he was too late to help. Or worst, times when he used them to hurt; to bring pain and fear and agony.

_You need to get the ending that you deserve, remember?_

Whenever he remembers those times, Emu can't even look at his hands; so ashamed as he is.

Sometimes, he dreams of a world where Parad didn't take his hand (couldn't or wouldn't, he's not sure) and then Emu is left gasping awake to escape that world; _any_ world that didn't have Parad safe and alive with him. In those moments, Emu would bury his head in drawn up knees, cocooning himself away from the world as tightly as he could while desperately doing his best to calm back down.

After those times, Emu tends to stare at their hands; his and especially Parad's. Emu tries to be careful about it though because he doesn't want Parad to worry; especially when it's just a silly fear.

"I don't think it's silly."

Almost spilling his coffee in surprise, Emu turns to the side to find Parad sitting on the desk by his elbow.

And here he thought that he's the only one in CR.

"Warning, please," Emu grumbles as he carefully sets aside his mug.

Parad smirks, swinging his legs. "Sorry."

"No, you're not," he deadpans with a snort.

"No, I'm not," Parad agrees as his smirk widens, before his expression turns serious. "I don't think it's silly."

Any other person would be appalled to have their minds and every thought easily read like an open book— would see it as a breach of privacy. For Emu though, it's a comfort and something fundamental that he holds dear. Even so, he wanted to avoid worrying his bugster with these thoughts so, right now? It's a bit disconcerting.

Emu rubs a hand to his face. "Why not?"

"Why would I?" Tilting his head, Parad leans close as his voice takes on a reasonable tone. "You don't think it's silly that I'm afraid of water."

Grimacing, he looks down at the table in shame. "And who's fault do you think _that_ is?"

"We've been through this." Parad reaches out to tilt up Emu's chin with a finger, eyes soft. "It's not your fault, Emu. I was already afraid of water when Cronus went after me."

He purses his lips. "And I made it worse with what I did to you."

The bond thrums, their emotions pushing and pulling between them. It's an old argument they have; one neither of them are willing to budge on. While it's true that it turned out for the better, it didn't change the fact that Emu hurt someone very precious to him. Parad always counters that he couldn't be reasoned with at the time and that since they were enemies, it's only a given that they'd eventually hurt each other.

They sigh.

"Agree to disagree?" Emu offers.

Parad nods. "For now."

In response to that, Emu pokes his tongue out; causing Parad to laugh. After a moment, Parad pulls his hand back and Emu has to resist from chasing after him. Noticing his reaction, Parad places his left hand between them on the table and turns it; palm up.

"This isn't about me," Parad murmurs, gentle and without censure before wiggling his fingers with a smile. "It's okay to ask, y'know?"

Swallowing the lump in his throat, Emu stares at the hand that's offered to him. Unbiddenly, his mind flashes back to the last time he tried to reach for Parad and he remembers feeling so helpless and horrified when he was too little too late— hand closing on the empty space where Parad used to be.

"Emu."

Returning to himself, Emu takes a shuddering breath and reaches a hand out to let it hover above Parad's. Looking up, he sees the smile and feels the bond humming like a heartbeat, and allows himself to ask. "Can I hold your hand?"

Eyes infinitely soft, Parad nods. "Of course."

Immediately, he latches onto Parad's hand and those long fingers curl around his in an answering grip.

Once he's certain that Parad won't fade away as he did before (as he does when the nightmares are particularly cruel), Emu loosens his white-knuckled grip but doesn't let go. Bringing up his free hand, he toys the edge of the magenta sleeve and in a moment of indecision, he glances questioningly up at Parad.

In answer, the bugster pulls the sleeve up to his elbow; revealing his bare arm.

Emu brushes his fingers across pale skin with a heavy heart as his fingertips skim across jagged scars before settling upon the wrist; pressing down to feel the comforting thump, thump of a pulse. The sound he makes at that is like a cross between a sigh and a sob, and it takes everything in him not to come apart by the seams.

Parad's other hand comes up to card through Emu's hair and he leans into the touch.

"I never thanked you, did I?" Parad asks, voice nothing but a whisper.

Emu blinks back the burn behind his eyes, brows furrowing. "For what?"

"For offering your hand to me." Parad lets out a self-depreciating chuckle. "Especially when I didn't deserve it."

While it's true that he'd been furious at Parad at the time and that his decision was more of a gamble out of necessity but honestly, Emu will never regret diving after Parad as he did— now more than ever when he can't even bear the thought of a life without Parad in it. However...it hurts to know that Parad still believes that he doesn't deserve a chance to be forgiven. It hurts even more because it was _Emu's_ fault for rejecting and ignoring Parad that made the bugster lash out. They wouldn't have lost so much time if Emu hadn't been so narrow sighted.

Emu shakes his head, angry at himself. "I should've offered you my hand _long_ before that— not when you were terrified and we were pushed into a corner." Grasping the bugster's hand in a trembling grip, he bows his head. "I'm so, so sorry for ignoring you and hurting you for so long, Parad."

"We _both_ did stupid, hurtful things." Parad brushes his thumb across his tear stained cheek. "Even though it really hurt when you ignored or rejected me, I still went too far when I used Chronicle."

Emu frowns as he reasons. "You didn't understand."

"Maybe," Parad agrees quietly. "But a part of me knew what I did was wrong. I just didn't wanna care."

"Parad..."

His best friend shakes his head as if to break away from his thoughts before Parad sends him a grateful smile.

"Thank you." Parad leans down to rest their foreheads together. "Thank you for reaching out to me in the end."

Without thinking, Emu lifts their clasped hands and presses his lips to the fluttering pulse above Parad's wrist. The hand in his grasp twitches in response to the surprise he can see flickering in the bugster's eyes and Emu brings it up to rest the palm against his cheek.

"Thank _you_ for reaching _back. _Especially when I gave you no reason to after I hurt you," Emu murmurs in the space between them. Heart still aching, he nuzzles into Parad's hand. "Parad?"

The hand that was carding through Emu's hair shifts until both hands are cradling his face, thumbs brushing across his cheekbones in a light caress. "Yeah?"

"I don't ever want to let you go again." Eyes locking, Emu raises his hands to cover Parad's as his voice lowers in determined promise. "Never again."

Parad doesn't look away from him, eyes wide and surprised— and with something deeper, something vulnerable as the bugster relaxes.

"Me too." A hint of playfulness bleeds into Parad's smile. "Looks like you're stuck with me."

Mirroring the expression, Emu bumps their noses together. "I can live with that."

As they share a laugh, Emu can't help but think that hands really are amazing; for good and bad things. But most of all, Emu thinks that he's quite fortunate that these hands of his are also meant to have and to hold too.


	20. You can borrow mine

**TIMELINE:** Post-canon; pre-relationship

* * *

**"You can borrow mine."**

* * *

The screaming tips them off; breaking their attention away from their consoles.

It's Emu's day off and they were playing their games together at a park nearby their apartment. Honestly, the day is supposed to be trouble free and Parad despairs at the timing because do game disease need to break out on the few days they were supposed to relax!?

Emu chuckles beside him, pocketing his console. "It's just one of those things, Parad."

"I'm gonna hog-tie whichever idiot it is and let them _hang_," Parad growls, shoving his console into his coat.

As they run to the scene side by side, Emu tilts his head to give him a teasing grin. "Don't forget that you used to be one of those idiots."

It's a testament to how far they've come since they were on opposite sides. Nowadays, they can tease each other about their messy past without the hurt and resentment that used to come along with it.

"Not the point." Parad sends a blast of pixels to a group of bugster foot soldiers then, pouts at his partner. "Also, _rude_."

Emu laughs, vaulting over an overturned planter.

The commotion leads them to a plaza, and he takes in the sight of people running away screaming as a giant Bugster Union roars in the middle of it. Letting out a sigh of resignation, Parad rolls his neck and slips his gashat into his hand.

"Uh-oh."

Glancing to the side, he sees Emu rummaging through his pockets with barely restrained panic.

"Uh-oh?" Dodging a flying rubble, he raises a brow at Emu. "What do you mean 'uh-oh'? Because that's never a good sign."

Panicked and sheepish in equal measures, Emu elbows a lackey and takes its spear with a grimace. "I forgot my driver and gashats."

"You _what!?_" Parad gapes at his best friend as he rounds a kick at an oncoming bugster. _"Why?"_

Emu huffs, whacking a bugster. "It's my day off!

"Good point. But didn't you say _this_—" Parad jabs a thumb to the Bugster Union with a deadpanned look. "— is just one of those things? Shouldn't you've been prepared?"

Groaning in exasperation, Emu levels the spear at a group of soldiers to scare them away from some terrified civilians. "I _know!_ I'm embarrassed that this even happened again."

"Again?" Parad asks before breaking down into pixels to bowl over the scurrying soldiers.

Snatching up a pair spears on the ground, Emu runs up to him once he reassembled back. "Burgermon."

Oh, that time.

Parad isn't fond of remembering what happened to that kind hearted bugster as it always leave a bitter taste in his mouth. Although it's hypocritical of him to think so since he's done a lot of cruel things in the past, he's not sure if he could ever forgive Genm for what he did that time.

"Ah...so that's why you were using that level 4 gashat," he says, settling for a neutral reply. Glancing down at his gashat, he shrugs and materialises his gamer driver before tossing them both to Emu. "Here, you can borrow mine."

Catching the items, Emu sends him a smile. "Thank you." The intern then gives him a contemplative look. "By the way, how you can carry these around so easily?"

"Hammer space." When his partner gives him a blank look, Parad snickers with a raised brow. "_Game_ virus, remember?"

Chuckling, the intern snaps the driver on. "Of course. Still, I wonder if we can figure out an easier way to carry around our gear. Like your hammer space...or maybe an inventory."

"The driver _is_ pretty bulky," he admits, sending a bugster flying to a wall with a punch. "And trying to keep track all of those gashats can be a bit of a pain."

Emu laughs like he can't help it, twirling one of the spears in his hand to smack another bugster. "How angry will Kuroto-san be if we point that out?

"Very." Parad smirks when he imagines the aneurysm such a comment will cause the former CEO. "He'd shriek at us not to bootleg his merch again and that we don't understand his divine genius."

Emu snickers. "True."

"Let's complain anyway."

Emu sends him a flat look. "You just love annoying him, don't you?"

"You can't tell me you don't find his Looniness hilarious," he says, sliding in front of Emu to raise a wall of pixels as cover when the Bugster Union tries to shish-kebab them.

Parad can hear the smirk in Emu's voice as he chuckles behind him. "Never said that."

**CLICK AND LOAD!**

"Henshin!"

There's a flash of light behind him as a wave of data covers their surroundings before they're transported to a different stage as to minimise any more damage.

Cracking his knuckles, he turns back and blinks in surprise at what he sees.

"Huh, it looks different on you."

Standing before him is Perfect Knockout but, at the same time...not. The head spikes and upper body resemble more closely to Ex-Aid's and he sees that the usual red and blue getup is replaced with Emu's signature magenta and green.

"Eh?" Emu turns in place and examines himself more closely in surprise. "Ah, you're right. I got a different colour palette...even some design changes too."

An understatement. Strange as it seems, the look works for Emu. _Too_ well, in fact.

"Perfect Knockout just got a hold different meaning. It looks good on you," he comments as he comes closer, brushing his fingers against Emu's jaw and runs them down until settling on Emu's hip. "_Very_ good."

Emu breathes out a laugh, gripping the back of Parad's neck as he pulls their fronts flush together. "Are you flirting with me right now?"

It's a good thing the barrier is holding up because they'd be in trouble right now if it wasn't.

_'Although,'_ he thinks ruefully to himself, staring down at the magenta and green eyes as the bond spikes with an unfamiliar but welcomed heat. _'I think I already **am** in trouble.'_

Parad swallows with some difficulty. "Can I?"

"Only if I get to flirt _back_," Emu murmurs as he leans close before smacking Parad's ass.

A squeak breaks past his lips before he can stop it and even with the headgear on, Parad can tell that Emu is smirking in a way that made many girls from their genius gamer days very, _very_ dizzy.

Well, hot damn.

Mouth pulling up into an excited grin, his eyes flash red before he dissolves into pixels as he and Emu merge. Once the barrier falls, they lunge into battle with two hearts beating as one.

And if they continue to flirt and banter inside their shared mindscape as they take down the Bugster Union and its lackeys, well...

That's no one's business but their own.


	21. You might like this

**TIMELINE**: Post-canon; established relationship

* * *

**"You might like this."**

* * *

Parad thinks he needs to make a list.

Nose buried deep in a travel magazine, Parad thumbs through the pages with interest; paying close attention to the popular attractions and its details. It's quite a surprise that there's so many hotspots in the Kantou region alone, with Tokyo, of course, being the most obvious one. Parad is a bit embarrassed now that he didn't venture out of the surrounding areas of Genm Co. or Seito Hospital all these years. The furthest he's been in the six years he was separated from Emu was to Akihabara and even then, he didn't pay much attention to the sights since he went there mostly for his games or arcade hopping.

"Huh, the sights in Kanazawa looks ridiculously good." Parad dog-ears the page, humming under his breath. "That's a definite yes."

Familiar arms suddenly wrap around his neck and Parad smiles as Emu nuzzles his cheek. Turning his head, Parad slots his mouth against Emu's and lightly growls when Emu parts his lips to deepen the kiss. Once they break apart, he nips the doctor's nose and cackles at the yelp Emu lets out— only to have his mirth cut short when Emu retaliates by biting his ear, causing Parad to let out his own yelp of surprise.

Before he has the chance to chase after him, Emu grabs his face to squish it and grins at the face Parad is making. Stealing another kiss, Emu then pulls away to round the bench by the hospital courtyard Parad is sitting on and settles beside him. Noticing the magazine in Parad's hands, Emu makes a curious sound as he points at it.

"It's rare for you to read a magazine," Emu comments, eyes thoughtful. "Much less about tourism."

Parad shrugs, sharing half of the magazine with Emu and the doctor takes it with a smile. "I know but I surprisingly got bored terrorising Genm so I went through the magazine rack in the hospital lobby."

While he can usually amuse himself on the days when there's no game disease patients or work at the ministry, Parad already finished all of his recent games and since Genm is on one of his 'divine' spiels again, well...Parad ended up trying to keep himself busy in the hospital lobby. The fact that a travel magazine of all things managed to keep his attention long enough until Emu is on his break is actually really surprising for him too.

"Why a travel magazine though?" Emu asks, burrowing into his side and tracing fingers across the glossy pages.

Wrapping an arm around Emu's shoulders, Parad brings them closer and rests their heads together. "I thought about what you said to me once; about broadening my horizon?"

Parad feels Emu nodding against him.

"Well, I thought travelling would be a good start as any." He taps a finger at the magazine. "Japan has really awesome places to visit and I'm kinda embarrassed that I only realised how cool our country is when I went through this."

"These are pretty cool," Emu agrees and lets out a considering hum. "I think it's a good idea; especially since you can teleport place to place. Still...the long distance teleport might be a bit taxing for you."

"It's good practice though." At a page about Nagano, he reaches out to stop Emu from turning it. "Ah, hold on. You might like this."

Emu makes an excited noise, leaning closer to read the description on the glossy page.

"Oh, wow that's so coo— wait." Emu blinks up at him in surprise. "Did you picked these places with me in mind?"

Brow rising, he gives Emu an incredulous look. "Of course, I did. You always do it for me whenever we go out anywhere—" Parad pauses when a thought that Emu might not want to come along crosses his mind. "Unless...you don't want to?"

"Of course I want to," Emu reassures, giving Parad's hand a squeeze. "I just thought that since this will be an experience for you to broaden your horizon, you'd prefer traveling on your own."

"Like hell." He leans down and lightly bumps their foreheads together. "There's no way I wanna go to these cool places without you, Emu."

Touched and looking a bit overwhelmed, Emu cups his jaw and pulls him in for a kiss; warm and languid. After they break apart, Emu smiles up at him. "Thank you, Parad."

"You're welcome," he quips before grimacing. "Although, I'm sorry if this is something that I should've asked you first though."

Emu chuckles and rest his head on Parad's shoulder.

"It's alright. It makes me really happy that I'm always included in your plans too." Pausing, the doctor glances up to give him a pointed look. "Even if some of them might be stupidly insane."

Memories of them free falling and flying flash through the bond, and Parad bursts out laughing.

"Emu, we found out that we can _fly_. How is that not awesome?"

Emu huffs with a pout. "Never said it wasn't. But did we have to discover that ability when we're falling off the Skytree?"

"But it was still fun~" he singsongs and sees Emu biting back a grin.

"...it was," Emu relents with a sigh. "Terrifying though."

Well...they _had_ been hundreds of feet in the air. Didn't help that Emu's transformation had been canceled midway at the time. Parad thinks he lost a few years of his life that day.

"Oh, definitely." Then because he's an adrenaline junkie, Parad grins down at Emu with a raised brow. "Wanna do it again?"

Emu makes a show of considering his offer before he mirrors Parad's grin. "Maybe on my next day off?"

"It's a date," he says, swooping down to steal a kiss.

Laughing at his antics, Emu returns the kiss before pulling back to tap the forgotten magazine on their laps. "Speaking of dates, what do you think about this place here?"

Parad leans down and nods. "Yeah, that looks pretty good. Since you can teleport now too, we don't have to worry about traveling money if the distance is too far."

"I'm still not as good as you though," Emu points out, concerned.

"That's 'cause I had years of practice. You'll get used to it," Parad reassures. "And besides, since we'll be together, joint teleportation will be easy."

Emu smiles. "That's true."

In the end, they spend the entirety of Emu's break discussing their plans; ones that'll be spent exploring more of all the things life has to offer.

Together.


	22. It's not heavy I'm stronger than I look

**TIMELINE**: Post-canon; established relationship

* * *

"**It's not heavy. I'm stronger than I look"**

* * *

Emu has been reading the same passage for far too long.

Currently in the library within the Ministry of Health, he and Parad have been going through files and journals in their ongoing game disease research for five hours straight, and Emu thinks that maybe it's about time to take a break because the words really are starting to blur.

"I think it's time for a break," Emu says, rubbing his eyes before glancing to the side and immediately has to bite back a grin when he sees Parad lightly banging his forehead on the book he was reading.

Parad sighs, raising his head as pixelated steam rises up from his head while spirals spin in the bugster's eyes. "No complaints here."

Chuckling, he presses a kiss to Parad's cheek and stands up from his seat to gather their journals and books in a stack. "Let me just put these away then."

"I can help," Parad offers, rising up with a yawn and stretches his arms above his head. The motion causes his partner's sweater to ride up, revealing a patch of pale skin with a hint of finger-shaped bruising by the hip.

Emu only realises that he's staring when he catches Parad smirking lazily at him, head tilting coyly to the side.

Face flushing and probably coughing louder than he should for his reaction, Emu pulls the stack to him.

"It's fine, it's not heavy," Emu replies to Parad's offer as he lifts the stack and makes his way to the book cart. "I'm stronger than I look, you know."

"Well, I know that," Parad retorts back with a snort as he falls in step beside him. His bugster then slants him a loaded glance before Parad leans down to whisper into his ear. "After all, you did held me up without any trouble when we had sex against the wall last night."

It's a good thing that Emu already set down the pile on the cart because it would've tumbled down onto the floor from how he almost jumps out of his skin at the reminder. Blushing to the roots of his hair, Emu whips up to glare at his smirking bugster as he hisses.

"Parad!"

With mischief bright in his eyes, Parad leans down and traces a finger to Emu's jaw. "What? It's the truth. I mean, you hide it well underneath your baggy clothes and sweet nature but whenever you make love to me— hot damn, I feel it right in my _bones_, Emu."

"You...!" Glancing around at the thankfully empty aisle, Emu grabs that wandering finger and jolts with a gasp as memories of their recent lovemaking rush into the forefront of his mind— of kiss swollen lips moaning into his ear and long legs wrapping around his waist. Or that of himself; writhing and filled to the brim as Parad thrust into him with a wicked smirk. Emu quickly cuts those memories off though, before it can cause him to do something _very_ inappropriate. "Please don't turn me on right now, Parad."

Parad tilts his head, causing curly bangs to brush temptingly across his lowered eyes. "Aw, why not? You _did_ say we need a break."

"We're not having sex in a library of all places, Parad," he states firmly and tries to ignore how tight his jeans feel at the moment.

Parad shrugs, voice taking on a reasonable tone that should _not_ be used to negotiate for having sex in a public space. "We're the only ones here on this floor though, and I can sense when there's someone near so we can easily teleport away."

"Not the point," he groans out, resisting the urge to smile at his perpetually impish partner. "It's a library, for goodness sake. You know, a place of knowledge and, not to mentioned a _public space?"_

"I suppose when you put it that way, it _does_ sound scandalous," Parad muses, hand on his chin before he leers at him. "Kinky~!"

Breathing out a fond laugh, Emu leans up to brush their lips together. "The answer is still no, you incorrigible pervert."

"I'm yours though," Parad quips with soft eyes, bouncing on the balls of his feet as he steals another kiss.

_Me and you. No end and no beginning. One and only._

Emu smiles into the kiss, heart aching sweetly in his chest. "As I'm yours."

Humming in thought, Parad glances around consideringly before he scowls. "Havta agree about the public space though— since we're both very..._possessive."_

"Very," he agrees, twisting a curl of Parad's hair with a finger.

Like every and all things intimate between them, sex for him and Parad is raw and vulnerable. Even the _thought_ of anyone walking in on them tends to make them ridiculously protective and a bit...vicious.

"I guess we've gotta cross out the kinky library sex off the list," Parad mumbles with a mock sigh before he gently pushes Emu against a shelf and winds his arms around his waist. "But I didn't hear a no to the sex, though?"

Biting his lip, Emu looks up at Parad under his lashes. "No, you certainly didn't."

"Then...?" Parad singsongs, inching his hands lower to cup Emu's rear and his breath stutters out of him.

Twining his arms around Parad's neck, Emu murmurs against smirking lips. "Let's go back to our apartment and take a nice long break, yeah?"

"Sounds like a good idea." Sharp canines nips at the corner of his mouth before Parad licks the seam of his lips. "Any request?"

Catching that tongue into his mouth, Emu sucks on it. Hard.

Parad lets out a gasp above him before tilting his head back enough so Emu can see the sheer hunger in his eyes.

Smirking at the reaction that only he can bring out, Emu digs his fingers into Parad's hair and grounds their crotches together. "Fill me up and devour me _whole_, Parad."

The bond flares with heat and desire as they both gasp while their thoughts of what _exactly_ they want to be done to each other ricochet between them. Emu has to pull himself back before he ends up mauling his partner; consequence be damned. While extremely tempting, they both try to resist the lure of returning to the singularity until they're in the privacy of their apartment with some success.

Shaking his head slightly, Parad returns his smirk with dark promise. He then narrows his eyes as they turn red before Emu's own vision bleeds in response.

"With _pleasure_, Emu."

Their laughter echoing the aisles, the library disappears as they gleefully teleport away.


	23. I'll wait

**TIMELINE**: Post-canon; established relationship

* * *

**"I'll wait."**

* * *

Long shifts in winter months are very tiring.

Emu isn't sure if it's because of the season itself or if it's because of the cold. But whatever the reason may be, it makes the long shifts more tiring and him in particular, incredibly sleepy. So it's a bit (a lot) frustrating that he needs to stay back in the hospital longer than usual today because of unfinished paperwork.

And he was _so_ looking forward to playing games while snuggling under the warm kotatsu with Parad too!

"Ugh..." Slumping over his desk, Emu glares at his paperwork. "I hate this part of the job."

Cackling fills his ears before a familiar, warm body drapes over him. "You _did_ want to be a doctor, remember?"

"I don't remember signing up for paperwork in medical school," Emu mumbles into his desk before sitting up to turn his seat around, finding Parad materialising fully before him. "Why don't you head back first? It's gonna take a while for me to finish this."

"No way," Parad drawls out with a snort. The bugster then parks himself on the neighbouring chair and rolls it over until they're side by side. "I'll wait."

Smiling, he brushes curly bangs aside while his other hand taps at the pile. "I appreciate it, Parad, but I'm not kidding. This is going to take me at least an hour to finish."

"More time spent with you," Parad states matter-of-factly, bringing out his console. "What's the point of me going back to our apartment if you're not there?"

His heart warms at that even as he suggests. "Play games?"

"I can do that anywhere and besides, games aren't half as fun without you," Parad quips with a cheeky grin before his expression turns worried. "...I'm not being a bother, am I?"

Huffing out a disbelieving laugh, Emu leans over to kiss that expression away and feels himself smiling when Parad makes a soft, happy sound as he kisses back.

"You're never a bother to me," Emu murmurs against Parad's lips before pulling back fully to give Parad a reassuring smile. "I love having you around, Parad."

Parad smiles, bright and breathtaking even in the dim lighting. "Back at ya, Emu."

Chuckling, he reluctantly turns back to his desk and sets out to work. Side by side, they sit in silence. Minutes tick by as he writes his reports, double checking them to make sure that there'll be no mistakes once he has to hand them over. Once he's finished half of the pile, Emu glances up at the clock and almost drops his pen when realises that an hour has already passed. This is taking longer than he thought. Worried, his eyes dart to the side and sees that Parad is engrossed with his game.

Emu bites his lip, pen tapping against the desk and wonders if he should insist for Parad to go back. After all, Parad hates the cold even more than Emu and considering he still has another half of the pile to finish, it'll take longer than what he promised. While he knows that Parad said that he'll wait, it's quite troublesome isn't it? At least back at their apartment it'll be warm and Parad won't have to wait around for something that's not even his responsibility. Now that he thinks about it, it's not fair to have Parad wait for him like this so maybe he really should insist after all—

A hand grabs Emu's chin before his lips are caught in a kiss. Surprised, he blinks up at Parad to find the bugster is looking at him with fond exasperation before resting his forehead against Emu's.

"At this point, I don't even need to read your thoughts to know what you're thinking," Parad murmurs. "Wherever you are, is where I wanna be, Emu. It's not troublesome to wait because I **_chose_** to be here; I **_want_** to be here." Expression turning serious, Parad gives him a meaningful look. "So don't worry, alright? I'll wait."

From his tone and the way the bond flares golden, Emu knows that Parad is no longer talking about just waiting for him to finish his paperwork anymore.

It's a promise; a reassurance that he won't be left alone.

It's a promise Emu never thought he gets to hear; to have someone wait for him in any capacity. Whether it's back at the apartment or even just waiting for him to finish something (spending hours at an empty hospital office in the cold weather neither of them are fond of _cannot_ be fun). To know that the most important person in his life is willing to wait for him no matter what causes his heart to be so full that Emu can do nothing but take Parad's face in his hands and kisses him until they're both just this side of breathless— pouring all the emotions that Emu hopes can at least somewhat express how much he adores his partner.

When they break for air, Emu finds that he's somehow managed to crawl onto Parad's lap as he straddles the bugster. Flushing, he glances around at the still empty office and is about to slide back to his own seat before the hands on his hips stop him. Looking up, he sees Parad smiling at him before the bugster arranges them so that Emu is securely on Parad's lap with his back to Parad's chest.

"I think I'll wait until we get back to finish my checkpoint," Parad murmurs, kissing his ear as his arms wrap around Emu's stomach before Parad nuzzles his neck. "I'm a bit sleepy so I'm gonna doze off until you're done."

Chuckling, he cards a hand through Parad's hair and kisses his temple. "Alright then."

Making himself comfortable (well, more than he already is), Emu sets out to finish the last bit of the bane of his otherwise dream career with a lighter heart; knowing that no matter where Emu is, the person who is his heart and home will wait for him.


	24. Just because

**TIMELINE**: Post-canon; pre-relationship

* * *

**"Just because."**

* * *

Parad isn't used to physical contact.

Which might come as a surprise for people because he's actually quite tactile with others but when someone tries the same with him, Parad tends to flinch back. It's more of a defense mechanism along with his desire to have some semblance of control.

Too many times, he remembers being strapped down and helpless as Game Over after Game Over was forced upon him on the cold operating slab until he's mostly numb to any sort of pain for the longest time. Granted, he revived after each Game Over but that doesn't mean each one didn't hurt like _**hell**_ earlier on. And well...between being experimented on and conditioned to fight for his life when he's not busy playing his games, Parad suppose that a kind touch isn't something he's used to. It's a bit annoying but, he still tends to flinch whenever someone tries to touch him; especially when it comes as a surprise.

The moment Emu realised that stupid tendency of his, it worried the doctor to no end; thinking and fearing that the reason behind his aversion to touch was because Parad had been hurt in the past.

Okay sure, while it's true that he was experimented on (although, humans might find 'tortured' or 'mutilated' to be a more accurate word) back when New Genome first extracted him from Emu, he wasn't abused like some of the kids under Emu's care (not all kids come from loving families, unfortunately). Although, that fact doesn't reassure Emu one bit. If anything, it actually caused Emu to throw up in the toilets for quite some time before the enraged doctor marches out— hellbent on a warpath against Genm.

And as amusing it is to see Genm walking on eggshells around Emu, he knows first hand that you do _not_ want Houjou Emu on a warpath against you.

Ever.

So he takes pity on the cowering Genm and makes sure that Emu knows that it hadn't been Genm that gave the orders for the experiments and that it was actually Cronus instead— not that Parad _knew_ that until Cronus revealed himself on Chronicle. And as callous Genm can be, the former CEO hadn't personally hurt Parad until _after_ they became enemies.

(Parad is still trying to make sense of his turmoil about killing Genm. While he does feel guilty for basically 'biting the hand that feeds him' and killing a person in general now that he understands what a permanent death really means, it's very complicated when the guy himself actually _likes_ the outcome of his death).

So after he makes sure that Emu doesn't break his Hippocratic oath, the doctor leads them to a private room within CR and has been stewing in his head ever since.

Sitting on the table, he kicks his feet and alternates between playing his game and watching in concern as Emu scowls at the wall in front of him with silent tears streaming down on the intern's face. Parad can feel the bond pulsing with righteous anger, sickening horror and deep sorrow at what he revealed to Emu about his past. To be honest, Parad feels both confused and touched that Emu's been so worried about something like this.

It was years ago after all.

"Parad?"

Pausing from his game, Parad turns to find Emu slumping in his seat and looking very tired. Pocketing the console, he leans forward and rest his elbows on his knees. "Yeah?"

"You mentioned before that even after you escaped New Genome, you're not used to physical contact that are...kind," Emu croaks out, pained and so very sad.

Parad nods. "Pretty much."

"What did you meant by that?" Emu inquires, wiping his bloodshot eyes before trembling hands are clasped tight on top of the doctor's lap.

Shrugging, he leans back on his palms. "I kept to myself a lot; especially since I was an existence that others aren't allowed to know. Mostly, after New Genome, I was either isolated while playing my games or fighting— so I'm not used to touches that are...well, kind, I guess?"

"...Then what about me?"

Parad tilts his head, confused at how pale Emu has become. "What _about_ you, Emu?"

"I'm also one of the people that hurt you," Emu points out, eyes heavy with guilt and looking like he's only seconds away from throwing up again. "Are you okay being near me?"

Snorting, he looks away with a wry smirk. "I've also hurt you too, Emu. I should be asking _you_ that, y'know."

"I like being near you," Emu says firmly before he startles at his words and looks away. "I feel...safe when you're with me."

Tension bleeds out of his shoulders at that admission. "Me too, Emu. More than you know."

"So you don't—"

Parad waits and watches as Emu rubs his face with both hands before sighing and rests them on his lap. For a long moment, Emu clenches and unclenches his hands before raising his head to catch his gaze.

"You don't mind if I touch you?" When he snorts and sends a coy look to the doctor, Emu huffs with a wry twist of his lips. "You know what I mean, Parad."

Cackling, his eyes soften and thinks seriously about his answer. He understands what Emu is asking and he marvels at how kind hearted his friend is. Between the two of them, Parad is the one who had caused the most pain and yet, here they are— Emu asking him if his touch will be welcomed after what happened with Muteki. While he can't deny that the whole ordeal was traumatic, Emu has more than made up for his radical gamble.

And from what he's seen, physical contact hasn't been too much of a problem for them so far after he resurrected. So.

"See for yourself," he offers, closing his eyes and leaning close.

Immediately, he can feel the bond spiking with anxious worry before it's reigned into solemn determination. Slowly, carefully, Parad feels fingers brushing the side of his face and he waits for the usual knee-jerk flinch to a touch he didn't initiate...only to find none.

They both let out a breath.

Eyes fluttering opened, Parad blinks to find a tearful Emu as the doctor trembles. Feeling a burn behind his eyes, Parad carefully places his hand on top of Emu's to press it firmly against his face. In front of him, Emu immediately tenses up and watches him with attentive eyes. Smiling, he nuzzles into Emu's palm and reassures. "If it's you, Emu, then I don't mind at all."

And just like that, he can see a burden being lifted off of Emu's shoulders as the doctor slumps forward to rest their forehead together with a relieved, wretched sob.

"I'm sorry," Emu gasps out, tears falling in rivets as the bond _wails_ with shattering hurt and sorrow for all the pain that was inflicted on him. "I'm so sorry, Parad."

Blinking back tears, Parad sniffs as he closes his eyes and cards his fingers through Emu's hair. "I know, Emu."

Things...become a bit easier after that.

It's a slow progress but gradually, the both of them become more tactile with one another. It teaches them to be more comfortable with each other's presence.

As weeks pass, Parad realises that he's growing more receptive to close contact from others too. From being glomped by Poppy and Nico, shoulder pats from Lazer, and even to the rare tap on the back from either Brave or Snipe. Granted, it always has to be announced in some way or another since Emu went out of his way to advise the others that he doesn't like surprises. Thankfully, the excuse is accepted without much fuss even if he suspects that CR might have an inkling as to the reason behind his aversion to touch, because well, medical personnel, y'know? They were trained to pick up his kind of signs after all. Despite the fact that he can see the concern in their eyes, he's grateful though that they never pried. Their acceptance and kindness are a bit disconcerting at first because the closest thing he had to physical contact was hair ruffles from Graphite. The situation is even more odd because these people used to be his enemies that he had hurt just as much as they did him.

Life really likes to throw curveballs at him, that's for sure.

Still, despite having Emu's reassurance that the doctor likes being in his presence, Parad hadn't been sure if _his_ touch would be welcomed either until Emu himself becomes more tactile with him too. Parad doesn't hesitate much after that and well, considering their connection, Parad is still more receptive to Emu than anyone else. It's a fact that he thinks Emu feels a bit embarrassed about because of how happy it makes the doctor.

Parad on the other hand, just feels relieved and smug.

As time goes on, he learns that kind touches have many forms; a way to comfort, to support, to encourage, to show gratitude. And as far as Parad knows, there's always a reason and an intention. So it throws him off when there are moments when he can't see or figure out the reason _why_.

Unsurprisingly, Emu is behind that.

At times, Emu confuses him because there'd be no logical reason for the doctor to touch him. Parad is used to high fives and fist bumps after a battle, the pats on his shoulders or back as a greeting or when he needs reassurance. Heck, he's even grown used to holding Emu's hand whenever either of them needed the comfort. But there are times when Emu reaches out to him for no apparent reason other than the fact that Parad is _there_ with him— as if his presence alone is enough for Emu to want to seek him out just as much as it is for Parad when it comes to Emu.

He likes that Emu; who usually puts people at arm's length despite being close enough to offer help is willing to reach out to him so often. He feels incredibly humbled that he's one of the people Emu is allowing himself to believe that it's okay to hold onto without fearing them leaving.

More than anything, Parad likes it that he's allowed to touch _back_.

So he doesn't ask the reason why there are times when he's suddenly pressed shoulder to hip as Emu settles beside him despite there being other places he can sit, or when Emu feels playful and jumps onto his back; because Parad likes to do all of those things in return for no apparent reason other than—

"Eh?"

Emu's hugging him.

...that's new. Sorta.

True, there was that instance when Emu hugged him after his resurrection but at the time, Parad was too busy trying not to flinch and push his friend away at what he initially thought to be an attack.

Now though, he can at least recognise that he's not in any danger. In fact, it's actually pretty...nice. Awkward and clumsy though, but it's also warm and familiar in a way where he knows that it can only be that way because it's _Emu_. At first, he stiffens at the unexpected contact before relaxing in Emu's hold and returns the hug.

"Why are we hugging?" Parad murmurs, burying his nose into Emu's hair.

Emu smiles, nuzzling into Parad's neck. "Just because."

"Just because, huh?" Parad chuckles as he tightens the hug. "So all of those times when there's no reason for you to touch me is—"

"Just because," Emu finishes, tilting his head up to rest his chin on Parad's collarbone with a sweet if hesitant smile. "...is that okay?"

Here in the arms of the most important person in his life, Parad is lost in a warmth and love and forgiveness he has never deserved, but will do his damnest to make sure it won't be in vain.

"More than," he reassures, bumping his nose with Emu's. "I like it."

Smile widening until Emu is practically beaming at him, the intern squeezes his middle. "Me too."

Touching; whether there's a reason for it or not, never becomes a problem for them after that.


	25. Look both ways

**TIMELINE**: Post-canon; pre-relationship.

* * *

**"Look both ways."**

* * *

Ever since he regained his memories of the car...accident, Parad has been wary of both water and road crossings.

Water because it always reminds him of drowning and that cold rainy day. And as for road crossings? It's only natural that he'd be wary of 'em. That's why, whenever Emu has to cross the road, Parad has taken up the habit to check the surrounding area for any oncoming traffic.

Obsessively.

But can anyone really blame Parad, when it involves Emu's well being? And Emu; bless him, doesn't laugh or even jokes about Parad's habit. If anything, the doctor takes it in stride and waits patiently until Parad is satisfied.

"...Parad?"

Floating unseen above the doctor, Parad stares unblinkingly at the crossing light. "Yeah?"

The bond pulses with guilt.

"...I'm sorry I dragged you down with me that day," Emu whispers into the quiet, empty street. "I just wanted—"

When Emu trails off with a shuddering sigh, Parad leans down to wrap his arms around Emu's neck in a hug as he finishes quietly. "A restart."

"...yeah." Emu lets out a hollow laugh and ducks his head. "Stupid, huh?"

"Not really," he muses, chin resting on Emu's head. "You were a kid and wanted a better life. And well, with a father like Kiyonaga, who can blame you?"

It hurts to remember that cold, rainy day now— makes him despise Kiyonaga even more for causing Emu to feel so alone and such despair that it drove Emu (who was an eight year old kid for goodness sake) to try to take his own freakin' life. Even if it was by proxy, something like that should never have happened.

While the stress and despair triggered his virus into Emu's system as well as intertwining them so closely, Parad hates that it was even necessary at all or that he couldn't do anything to stop Emu from stepping into that oncoming car.

Raising a hand, Emu squeezes his wrist. "I had you."

"You didn't know that though," he gently reminds the doctor. "As far as you knew, I was just an imaginary friend that you see in reflections. I wasn't enou—"

"Yes, you were!" Emu refutes, almost shouting his words out and it's a good thing that they're alone or there'd be a lot of staring right now. Taking a deep breath, Emu ducks his head. "You were enough— you _are_ enough for me. I just...didn't understand that."

The light starts flashing across from them.

"Thank you," he says eventually against the lump in his throat. "You've always been enough for me too, y'know? I don't remember much anymore but I do remember that I was happy that you were my host."

Emu leans back against him. "Thank you, too. Not just for being my Player 2 back then but also for that day too."

"...what do you mean?"

"I'm a doctor, Parad." Emu tilts his head back to give him an even look, mouth twisting into a wry smile. "I've looked through my files and I know that with the rain, the speed, and not to mentioned that I was this scrawny eight year old— that accident should've killed me upon impact. And yet, I was only brought in for an abdominal injury."

Parad looks away.

"Before Kyoutarou-sensei, it was _you_ who saved me that day," Emu states. "And you even kept me alive long enough for me to be brought into the hospital."

"I didn't want you to die," he says before his shoulders slump with remorse. "But I can't say it was just because I cared. I also saved you because I didn't want to die if you did."

Emu chuckles as he turns to look at the flashing light. "You don't have to feel guilty for that. In the end, you helped save me and I'm grateful for that."

"Guess we're even?" Parad jokes weakly and looks both ways. "You saved me back too."

The doctor looks up at him with remorse. "Not in the best of ways though."

"Maybe not," he agrees. "But you did anyway despite my screw ups."

Emu rubs his eyes with a sniffle. "Seems like we've made it a habit of saving each other, huh?"

"Seems like," Parad says with a hum and blinks as the light finally turns green. He checks the road one last time and grasps Emu's shoulder. If his grip trembles just the slightest bit, Emu doesn't comment on it. "Look both ways."

There's a plea in his voice that Parad knows that he can't hide and Emu reaches up a hand to answer his grip before the doctor does as Parad asked.

Once satisfied, Emu crosses the road with quick yet careful steps while Parad anxiously glares at both sides of the road; staying vigilant.

Parad knows he's being ridiculous, especially since Emu has survived far worst ordeals and Parad himself can easily teleport them to safety if anything happens but he can't help it— Emu is his best friend and his life is precious to Parad.

When Emu is safe on the other side, Parad slumps in relief and winds his arms around Emu again; chest to back.

"You can laugh, y'know," Parad mumbles into Emu's neck as they weave between other pedestrians, none of them the wiser at the invisible bugster hanging onto his human. "I know I'm being ridiculous."

Emu shakes his head and leads them to a secluded shade nearby. When Parad materialises in front of Emu, he's promptly wrapped into a hug as Emu winds his arms around him; tight and almost desperate in his hold.

"I'm not laughing," Emu whispers. "Why would I?

Parad returns the hug just as fiercely. "You're not like that anymore."

_You're not the same kid that wanted to die in hopes for a better restart._

"I'm not," Emu agrees, craning his head up to give Parad a solemn look. "But that's not going stop you from worrying about me and that's okay."

Snorting, he turns his head away with a sardonic smirk. "It's probably annoying for you though."

"It's not," Emu states firmly, gently guiding him back so that their eyes locked. "Was it annoying for you when I didn't want you to be involved in a battle for awhile after you resurrected?"

Brows furrowing in confusion at the sudden change of topic, Parad shakes his head. "No, why would— oh."

For weeks, Emu refused to let Parad out of his sight— to a point where the intern requested that Parad would sit out their battles and just settle within their shared mindspace. Parad hadn't complained despite wanting to throw himself into a fight; not when he could feel Emu's stress levels spiking whenever Parad is within proximity of any sort of danger. If anything, the obvious concern had made Parad happy.

Emu breathes out a helpless laugh, brushing his fingers through Parad's bangs. "Yeah. So I get it alright? Just as my life is precious to you." The doctor then cups his face and rests their foreheads together. "Your life is precious to me too, Parad."

Snickering, he mirrors Emu and lightly sways them side to side; heart full yet light at the same time in his chest.

"Guess that means we havta always look out for each other so those kind of things won't happen again, huh?" Parad murmurs, nuzzling into Emu's face and causing his friend to laugh.

With eyes bright to match his grin, Emu raises a brow at him in challenge. "You up for it?"

Parad smirks in answer. "Bring it on."


	26. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to

**TIMELINE**: Post-canon; pre-relationship.

* * *

**"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to."**

* * *

Thinking back, Emu should've known that just because he had good intentions when he used Muteki against Parad, doesn't mean there won't be consequences.

Such a painful reminder for a normal day.

Emu was simply on his break and just joking around with Parad in the hospital courtyard. They were playing a game of tag; laughing and feeling like kids again when he accidentally tripped and collided against Parad, causing the bugster to fall into the fountain.

"I'm sorry!" Laughing, he grips the lip of the fountain and leans over, offering his hand. "I didn't mean to."

When his friend doesn't grab his hand, Emu frowns in concern.

"Parad? Are you—"

A wave of cold terror washes over the bond he shares with Parad, and Emu breaks off with a gasp— doesn't even think twice as he vaults over the fountain.

"Parad!"

Wading through the water, he shakes his head to clear away the droplets from the overhead spray and feels his breath stutters out of him when he gets a clear view of his best friend.

_Can't breathe. Drowning. Don't wanna die. Hurts. Dark. Pain. Can't breathe. **Drowning.**_

Parad is white as a sheet with his eyes wide and glassy, looking like he's barely even breathing.

Stumbling to his knees, he cups Parad's face in his hands and realises the minute trembling underneath his fingers. Pressing their foreheads together, Emu can hear snippets of Parad's mounting panic within the bond before it splits into white noise.

**_CaN't BrEaThE. cA_****_n'T bReaThe. _****_CAn'T bReAtHe._**

Vision bleeding, Emu reaches into the antibody woven into his DNA and—

_**HELP!**_

— _pulls._

The world tilts and shifts, colours mixing and whirling before everything rights itself back as he and Parad tumble onto the floor of their genkan. He sees Parad trying to scramble away but falls heavily to his hands and knees as if he's exhausted and Emu feels his heart breaking when Parad tries to make himself small as he curls into a ball; soaked to the bone and gasping for air.

Emu crawls over to his bugster, trying his best to ignore the images flashing across his mind—

(Cronus. Muteki. _Himself_ as he drops Parad right into the cold, dark waters. Gamedeus. Death. Limbo. Alone and forgotten in the everlasting darkness; left to drown).

— focuses on the here and now as he gathers Parad in his arms.

_I did this._

Pale, clammy, shivering, Parad takes a moment to process that Emu is holding him before the bugster clutches Emu's arms as he clings on, his face screwing up with pain and fear.

"E-Emu—!"

Parad breaks off, unable to continue, curling into Emu and not looking up as his body shakes with sobs and Emu—frightened by the revelation of what his radical gamble had done, feels sickening dread and shame weighing his body down.

_I'm sorry._

The bugster is trembling at a frightening rate and absolutely colourless; clearly going into shock. Emu takes a breath and presses his mouth into a thin line. Adjusting his hold around Parad, he braces himself and lifts his friend up into his arms; cradling him close. Technically with Parad's height, the bugster should be heavier than Emu but in his panic, it seems like half of Parad's body is intangible as if he's in the process of merging them but doesn't have the energy or in the right state of mind to do so at the moment.

_I didn't mean to._

Using one hand to grab the towels from the rack outside of the bathroom, Emu marches inside and eases carefully into the empty bathtub; grip firm and murmuring soft platitudes against Parad's temple as the bugster clings on. Ignoring the water dripping off them, Emu unfolds the towels to drape and wrap them around Parad with trembling hands until his best friend is safely cocooned in them.

Parad stirs, lifting his head slightly, but his partner doesn't look at him; breaths coming in shuddering gulps as fatigue saps his ability to maintain such a high pitch of emotion. For a very long while, nothing is said.

Parad is scared of the water and it's all Emu's fault.

Pressing a kiss against damp curls, Emu pulls back slightly to gaze down at the bugster in his arms, able to sense his misery and exhaustion within the bond. Gently keeping the blanket wrapped around him, Emu sits Parad up and cups his face in both hands. The doctor in him needs to see Parad's eyes and although he knows it's not likely since Bugsters don't get hurt easily, Emu is still relieved to find that there's no signs of injury or concussion from the fall.

_I'm sorry, I didn't mean to._

Satisfied, he takes a deep breath and regardless how clumsy he still is when it comes to the bond, pours every bit of warmth he can to it. Emu tries to chase away the cold and the fear, replacing them with all the care and adoration and the comfort to this person who is his Heart; hoping that what he's doing is enough.

Parad shudders in his arms, but slowly he unwinds from the ball he's trying to turn himself into as he lets out a relieved sigh.

"You're safe," Emu murmurs against wet bangs, tightening his hold. "You're home. Anything you need; help or to talk or just to be left alone— I'll do it. I promise, Parad."

Parad snuffles into his neck as he curls closer. "...Stay? Please s-stay, Emu."

"For as long as you want me," he reassures, eyes screwing shut as tears stream down his face.

_I'm so sorry, Parad. I didn't mean for this to happen._

"Not your fault, Emu," Parad rasps out, hand grasping his shirt. "W-water...was afraid when C-cronus went after me."

"But I made it worst," Emu counters furiously, and the fact that Parad falls silent is damning. "When I struck you down as Muteki..."

_I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. I'm sorry._

"No," Parad says in a voice that will permit no argument, sitting up. Despite how pale he is, Parad's gaze is steady and firm. "Considering how cruel I was, what you did finally stopped me."

Emu narrows his eyes, tears blurring his vision. "It wasn't right."

"No," Parad agrees with a mournful twist of his mouth. "But it was necessary."

They glare at each other, neither one of them relenting. They must make quite the sight though; wet as a pair of drown cats and glaring at each other like they're fighting over the last fish between them— and if it were any other time, Emu would've find the situation hilarious. But he's not laughing.

Neither of them are.

Snugged in towels and in his arms, somehow Parad seems smaller and younger than he really is. Despite his face is still terribly pale and strained, his friend is as stubborn as ever.

"We could argue about this until the cows come," Parad mutters petulantly and it's such a Parad thing to say that it makes Emu slump forward to hug the incorrigible gremlin.

"We could," Emu agrees with a huff, feeling Parad winding his arms around his middle. "But not today."

Parad nods against his head.

"...what do you need?" Emu asks, cupping Parad's face and gently wiping away the tears from red rimmed eyes.

Face crumpling, Parad sniffs as he ducks his head. "You. Just you. Here with me...please."

Such a paradox the two of them are. For all the hurt they've caused each other, they're also the ones who can take those same hurts away.

_We're a bit of a tragedy, aren't we?_

"I'm here," Emu promises. "Let's warm up first though, yeah? I'll make you some hot chocolate."

That brings a faint smile out of Parad. "With whipped cream and cinnamon?"

"Duh," Emu quips with a weak chuckle.

Parad leans into his hands, smile widening just the slightest bit. "And then cuddles?"

"Lots and lots," Emu reassures with a nod.

_Not always._

So after they shed their wet clothes, he takes Parad by the hand and leads them to the bedroom to change into warm, comfortable and most importantly, _dry_ clothes. Once that's done, they shuffle into the kitchen to make some hot chocolate as promised.

And through it all, Emu makes sure that he sticks close to Parad.

_Not anymore._

Emu hands over the blue and red mug to Parad, who takes it with a grateful smile before his expression falters.

"What about work?"

Taking a careful sip, Emu reaches over to intertwine their fingers as they make their way to the living room.

"I've already told the hospital I'm taking a half-day," Emu says, gently pushing Parad onto the couch before joining him. "I don't want to leave you alone right now."

Parad follows without fuss, clutching the mug in his hands and takes a large gulp before he turns to look at him, whipped cream on his upper lip and nose. "We can just fuse and I'll just sleep inside our mindscape. You don't need to miss work because of me."

There's a soft ache in his heart as he stares at the bugster in front of him; all tousled curls and dressed in sweatpants, soft thumbhole sweater with fuzzy socks while clutching a mug to keep himself warm. Right now, Parad looks soft and vulnerable in a way he's never seen before. It makes Emu want to have just the two of them hide away from the world for awhile.

It makes him want to reach over and kiss the one who is his heart, soul, and home because sometimes, things are too much and not enough—

No. He doesn't have the right.

"It's for my own peace of mind too," Emu whispers, swallowing the lump in his throat and wipes away the sweet mess on the bugster's face with a thumb before licking it off. "Now, c'mere. You were promised cuddles, remember?"

Finishing his drink with the sort of ease that only those who knows they won't suffer a burnt tongue, Parad then crawls over to him with a bashful smile as he singsongs with subdued cheer. "Lots and lots~!"

He barely manages to put his mug down on the low table before an armful of warm, pliant bugster flops onto him, and Emu can't help but chuckle softly as he curls into Parad, tangling their legs together and pulling the blanket he brought over for this very reason to cover them both. Pressing a kiss to Parad's forehead, he cups his partner's face and wraps the bond around them both so that Parad knows that he's safe no matter what.

"I'm sorry," he whispers, brushing his thumbs against Parad's cheekbones as the bond twinges with his remorse for the phobia he unknowingly caused. Emu knows an apology is not enough but he has to at least try and start somewhere. "I didn't mean to hurt you this way. In _any_ way."

Emu honestly thought he was helping when he chose Muteki to teach Parad a lesson. But...he supposed that this is the consequences of those who chose to be cruel, to be kind.

Two wrongs don't make things right.

Parad leans into his touch, a tinge of sadness in his smile. "I know, Emu. I've forgiven you just as you've forgiven me for all the hurt and pain I caused you."

"Parad..."

"We don't have to be a tragedy anymore, Emu," Parad murmurs, kissing his cheek before resting his head on Emu's heart; where he always belongs.

Carding a hand through Parad's hair, his other arm wraps around the bugster. "No, we certainly don't."

It'll take time, and a great deal of effort and patience. Because despite the fact that they've been forgiven, this isn't something that can be healed overnight. No doubt that this won't be the last time they'll have to be reminded of their messy, painful history together. However...

One step at a time. Let's take one step at a time together.

There's a thorny road ahead of them and they might even need professional help for the pain they've caused to each other. Nonetheless, Emu thinks that as long as they try to do their best to move forward _together_ instead of apart, they'll find a way to be alright eventually.

So as he follows Parad into slumber, Emu dreams of the day where he and Parad can turn their complicated past into an unbreakable armour instead of the debilitating shackles it still is, and to finally be truly invincible together.


	27. Try some

**NOTES:**

**Timeline**: 4 months post-canon; pre-relationship.

Hatsumode: it's the first Shinto shrine visit of the Japanese New Year. Some people visit a Buddhist temple instead. Many visit on the first, second, or third day of the year as most are off work on those days.

Omikuji: random fortunes written on strips of paper at Shinto shrines and Buddhist temples in Japan. Literally "sacred lot", these are usually received by making a small offering and randomly choosing one from a box, hoping for the resulting fortune to be good.

Amazake: a traditional sweet, low-alcohol Japanese drink made from fermented rice. Many Shinto shrines provide or sell it in the New Year.

* * *

**"Try some."**

* * *

The shrine is practically swarmed with people as snow falls gently down; powdery and light, drifting lazily through the air. Hands clasped tight and warm, Emu guides Parad through the streets of Tokyo. Their footprints are soon lost among dozens of other sets passing beneath the torii, always politely to one side or the other.

"Here," Emu murmurs, slipping a shiny gold five-yen coin into Parad's hand as they wait in line for the altar. "For the offering box."

"I can't remember when's the last time I did this," Parad remarks, glancing around to see the mass of people lining up to give their offerings for the coming New Years just minutes away. "It's been ages…"

Emu looks at him curiously. "You never went to visit any shrines after the extraction?"

"Nope."

"Not even for Hatsumode?"

"Didn't see the point." Huddling close, he glances up at the impressive altar. "I thought I had unlimited years ahead of me so I never understood the fuss about New Years until now."

Emu hums in thought before the intern suddenly turns to him; wide-eyed. "Wait. Weren't you _born_ on New Years?"

"Sorta?" Parad breathes out a steady wisp of cool air. "Technically, I already existed long before Y2K but after the extraction, I can't remember when exactly is my birthday anymore." Pausing, he thinks that through before shaking his head. "No, well...I _could_ find out about it if I made the effort but I can't see the point to that. Besides, I didn't think my birth is anything worth celebrating so I never bothered."

"...do you want one?"

"Hm?"

Intertwining their fingers, Emu stares up at him with a look that he can't exactly decipher; soft but terribly sad. Maybe even a bit wistful too.

"A birthday," Emu clarifies, cheeks ruddy from the cold. "Do you want one?"

Mouth pursing in thought, he tilts his head up to stare at the dark sky and watches as the snow floats down; some of them landing on his nose and lashes. Finally, he lets out a sigh and shrugs.

"I don't care either way."

Emu bites his lip. "Because you don't see your birth as something worth celebrating?"

"Heh, my birth caused a lot of problems, didn't it? And well, I'm here, so that's enough." Grimacing, he glances away as memories of Chronicle resurface with unforgiving clarity. "Celebrating it seems like an insult to the people who suffered."

A hand cradles his jaw, guiding him back as Emu gives him a firm look. "I don't think it's an insult and for what it's worth, _I_ believe it's worth celebrating."

"You're probably the only one who thinks that." And before the doctor can protest about that comment, Parad swoops down to give Emu's cheek a swift peck. "Thank you though."

Emu lets out a huff but reluctantly lets the matter drop. Parad thinks that this won't be the last time they'll be talking about his controversial existence.

There's a chime ringing throughout the shrine grounds before everyone begins to count down the final seconds of 2017.

"Three! Two!"

He and Emu share a smile, hands clasped between them as they welcome the new year together for the first time in years. "One."

"Happy New Year!"

Squeezing his hand, Emu rests his head on his shoulder. "Happy New Year, Parad."

"Happy New Year, Emu," he says back, leaning his head on top of Emu's.

When they finally make it to the altar, they swing the rope and ring the bell together. They then toss their coins into the collection box, bow in unison, clap their hands, and close their eyes to pray.

_'Thank you,'_ he thinks, pondering hard to find the right words. _'Thank you for Emu and this second chance that I've been given,'_ he thinks at last, then nods to himself a bit, satisfied. _'Please let me do right by Emu and those I've wronged. Please give me the strength to carry the weight of my sins so I won't burden Emu anymore than I already have.'_

When he finally opens his eyes, Parad sees that Emu is looking at him with a smile; soft and curious.

"What did you pray for?" Emu asks as they walk down the stairs in tandem to make way for the people behind them.

Clearing his throat, Parad sheepishly ducks his head. "If I tell, it won't come true."

He's aware that Emu can easily read his mind if he really wants to know but the fact that the intern is asking outright is appreciated. While he doesn't mind telling Emu about his prayers, saying them out loud seems a bit embarrassing. And for some reason, Parad thinks it might even saddens the doctor. He tries to avoid that when possible.

"That's wishes on stars, I think," Emu remarks with a snicker but doesn't pry. "Either way, let's go see if we're lucky or not this year," he adds, tugging Parad's sleeve playfully and leading him to a small outbuilding with dozens of little drawers and a wall of paper knots. Emu drops a few coins into a little slot in the counter, then shakes the box until a stick falls out before passing it to Parad.

Once they've got their omikuji, they open the matching drawer for their fortune.

Parad blinks down at his fortune in surprise to find a kanji he didn't expect to find. "Good luck. Didn't expect that."

"Huh," Emu murmurs, grinning up at him as he shows Parad his fortune. "We match."

Parad laughs. "Combined, that should make 'Great Fortune', wouldn't it?"

"Well, we _are_ invincible together after all," Emu quips, gently knocking their shoulders together.

He smirks, throwing an arm around Emu's shoulders and brings them close. "That we are."

Carefully folding their fortunes, they then make their way to a stall that's selling hot cups of white beverages. It seems popular if the crowd is anything to go by. Well, as long as it can help stave off the cold then Parad isn't complaining.

"Two please." After thanking the lady, Emu offers one of the paper cups to him. "Try some."

Taking the proffered drink, Parad gives a careful sniff and finds a sweet aroma hitting his nose. Curious, he turns to give a questioning look to Emu. "What's this?"

Because he doesn't remember much of past Hatsumode when he and Emu shared the same body since he tended to be asleep at the time.

"Amazake." Emu smiles, gesturing at the cup. "Go on, it's good."

A tentative sip and his eyes widen in delight at the taste bursting on his tongue. "You're right, this _is_ good."

"Told you," Emu teases before laughing when Parad pokes out his tongue. The doctor then smiles at him and it's one of those smiles; bright yet soft with emotions he's not sure he can decipher— the ones that Parad is seeing with increasing frequency as of late. Oddly, those smiles are always directed at him for some reason. "Parad?"

Returning the smile, he lowers his head when Emu beckons for him to bend down. "Yeah?"

"I'll be in your care again this year, Parad," Emu says as he leans up to press a tender kiss on Parad's cheek.

Pleased, he chuckles and returns the kiss; lips lingering on a cool cheek before he nuzzles their faces together. "I'll be in your care this year too, Emu."

Although he may not know what the year has in stored for him, Parad is grateful that despite past tragedies, he's been given the chance to have a good start for the new year.


	28. Drive safely

**TIMELINE**: Post-canon; established relationship.

* * *

**"Drive safely."**

* * *

"Ready?"

They're on the rooftop of the hospital, face to face and Emu is a second away from bolting because this is nerve wrecking.

"...not really," Emu mutters, feet shuffling and wringing his hands.

"It'll be alright, Emu." Parad places his hands on Emu's shoulders and gives him a reassuring squeeze, a teasing grin playing on the bugster's lips. "Just, y'know, drive safely."

Groaning, he gives Parad a light shove. "How can you be so calm? What if I mess up and hurt you?"

The teasing expression softens as Parad shrugs. "You've never been worried whenever I took over your body, so why should I?"

"That's because you know what you're doing," Emu says reasonably before pointing to himself. "Me? I don't have the first clue on how to...'possess'."

"That's why I'm gonna teach you." Stepping close, Parad snakes his arms around Emu's waist. "And you also got something to look forward to once you get the hang of it."

The mischief in Parad's eyes warns him to be wary but Emu is more curious than not.

"Meaning...?"

Parad leans down to brush his lips against Emu's ear. "You'll improve your control when we joint masturbate— I'm sure you hadn't forgotten how _fun_ it was that first time when you accidentally possessed me."

Blushing at the memories that come to mind at Parad's words, he yelps when the hands on his waist slide down to grope his rear.

"Parad...!"

Laughing at his incorrigible lover, Emu tries to squirm out of Parad's hold but the bugster just reels him close and cackles as he nuzzles their faces together.

Honestly, it's like being in love with an overgrown _cat_.

"What? It got you to laugh, didn't it?" The smirk on those impish lips softens into a smile as Parad sways them lightly side to side. "It'll be alright, Emu. I'll still be here so, if things go awry I'll step in."

Emu winds his arms around Parad's neck, brows furrowing in worry. "This is a lot of trust, Parad."

"Why do you think I'm always surprised whenever you let me take over?" Parad says ruefully before his expression turns sombre. "Especially after all the times I hurt you using the same ability."

Shifting, he cups Parad's face in his hands. "I know you're not the same person that you used to be, Parad. I trust you, that's why it's never hard to let you take over."

"Then know that it's the same for me too."

Parad leans down to reel him into an open mouthed kiss that still makes his toes curl. When the bugster pulls back enough to rest his forehead with Emu's to curl the bond around them, Emu sighs in content as the warmth of it helps eases some of his worry.

With a snicker, Parad gives him a cheeky grin. "I trust you, Emu."

"Even if I'll mess up?" Emu asks wryly.

Snorting, the bugster sends him a flat look. "Duh."

Even though he's still worried, Emu is reassured at the hard earned trust in Parad's eyes. So with a deep breath, Emu leans up for a brief kiss then steps back with a determined set of his shoulders. "Alright."

Expression smoothing over into something serious, Parad folds his arms across his chest. "Now, remember what I told you. It's similar to teleportation, but instead of reforming to a location, you're gonna envelope me."

Emu nods. "And I can use the bond to lead my way to you, right?"

"Yup." Parad throws his arms to the side. "Ready...?"

Taking a deep breath, Emu focuses on reaching deep into his antibody and feels it slowly dispersing. Once he can feel the familiar sensation of his body breaking down into particles, he nods.

"Go!"

There's a dizzying sensation before Emu gives the bond a firm tug and suddenly, he's falling onto his butt with a faint ringing in his ear. Emu feels like the wind has been knocked out of him, especially since there's the odd sense of being at the edge of awareness. Worried, he searches Parad out through the bond.

"I'm sorry! Are you alright?"

Warm laughter chases down the bond. _{I'm fine}_ Then he feels Parad giving him a mental nudge. _{Open your eyes, Emu}_

Doing as he's asked, Emu blinks and looks around at his surroundings. It takes a couple of minutes for him to adjust at the heighten senses but it's close enough to his own that it soon feels like second nature.

In the past, Emu never really understood how different his biology is from other humans until Kuroto revealed his status as Patient Zero. Since then, it was hard to ignore or dismiss the heighten senses or how he's actually a great deal stronger and resilient than others. Initially, he was dismayed at the knowledge that he's not a normal human— hasn't been one since he was eight years old too. But...as time goes on as well as exercising patience in understanding his own unique individuality, Emu has since made peace with that fact. Nowadays, he finds it reassuring and comforting; more so when it's just another thing he and Parad can share together.

Once the ringing subsides, Emu tries to stand up before wobbling back down when his center of gravity doesn't agree with him. At that familiar sensation, he glances down and finds that he's wearing the same clothes that Parad was wearing. When he runs a hand through familiar curls, Emu lets out a disbelieving laugh.

Now that _definitely_ confirms that he's in Parad's body.

"It really worked..." Patting himself (themselves?) down, he checks over his borrowed body in worry. "But are you really okay, Parad?"

A burst of reassurance. _{No problems here}_

"So..." excited, he grins and gives a teasing mental poke at Parad, "test drive?"

Parad lets out a huff at that. _{Guess I won't the only one to use the car jokes anymore, huh?}_

"I'll do my best to be careful," he promises before slowly getting to his feet and shifts his weight accordingly to match Parad's height. He's always known that Parad is tall but to actually experience the difference is another thing entirely.

_{I know}_ Tendrils of love and support wrap around him before mischief joins in. _{Now let's go have some fun!}_

Laughing, he lets their visions bleed. "Let's."


	29. Well, what do you want to do?

**TIMELINE**: Post-canon; established relationship

* * *

**Well, what do you want to do?**

* * *

Staring up at the ceiling, Parad sighs for the umpteenth time and throws an arm over his eyes to block the array of holograms and pixels flying above him.

He needs a break because he's not going anywhere with this _at all._ Ugh.

"What are you doing?"

Startled, he turns his head to find Emu at the doorway of their study and wearing one of Parad's shirts and nothing else. The doctor has a bad case of bed hair and still looks sleepy, clutching his coffee mug like a lifeline. Parad marvels on how Emu can look both cute and sexy at the same time that he has to mentally shake himself so that he can answer Emu's question.

"Just thinking about the meaning of life," he drawls out from his position on the floor. Tilting his head, he smirks when Emu pads over to him without a care that he's giving Parad an eyeful. "And you're doing this on purpose, aren't you?"

Returning his smirk, Emu bends down to carefully place his mug on the low table and Parad swallows when the shirt rides up to reveal Emu's ass and the mess that's left behind from their activities the night before.

Yup, definitely on purpose.

And _goddamn_ if it isn't working.

Catching his thoughts, Emu laughs before he lies down beside him.

Not to be upstaged, he drags Emu close by the back of the doctor's neck and proceeds to literally steal Emu's breath away; waking the doctor up in more ways than one. Once he breaks the kiss, Parad cackles at the dazed look in Emu's eyes, causing his partner to pout.

"I'll get you back for that later," Emu warns with a glint in his eyes.

He grins. "Looking forward to it."

Letting out a huff, Emu rests his head on his shoulder and stares up at the ceiling with him in silence. With the coffee and kiss waking him up, Parad can sense that Emu is starting to realise what exactly he's looking at when the paediatrician shifts his head away to examine the holograms better.

"...Are these career choices?"

Parad coughs once, eyes darting away. "Yeah."

"Not a job," Emu mutters thoughtfully. "Which is good because that way I know you're not doing this because you feel like you don't want to be a burden to me— which you are _not_."

Parad snaps his mouth closed at the stern glare Emu's sending him. Giving his partner a reassuring smile, he leans close to kiss Emu's cheek. "I know. I've gotten better in understanding that over the years, Emu."

"Good," Emu says, eyes softening as the doctor nuzzles his cheek; a habit that Emu has since picked up from him it seems. "A career, huh?"

"Yeah." Leaning into the familiar touch, Parad brushes his lips across Emu's fluttering eyelids. "Seeing you and everyone in CR— at everyone who's making a living by doing what they're passionate about...it makes me want that for myself too."

Emu mouths his jaw, then leans back enough to give him a warm smile. "I think you'll do great in whatever you choose, Parad."

Sighing, he frowns up at the holographic diagrams. "That's the whole problem, though. I don't know _what_ to choose."

"Well," Emu muses, turning to look up at the holograms as well. "What do you _want_ to do?"

Parad darts a glance at Emu, curious. "Want?"

"Want," Emu confirms, grasping his hand between them. "You told me once that for the longest time, you've just gone with the flow. Outside of me, games, and eventually our friends, you've never _want_ much of anything for yourself."

Point. But well, it's sorta hard to want anything for himself ever since he achieved his original purpose back in Y2K.

He licks his lips, threading his fingers with Emu's. "Yeah. Never really see the point to it. I mean, I'm happy with all that I have now. But recently, it's like I told you. I want to be passionate about something— something that's not a hobby or interpersonal relationships."

"Something just for you and your future," Emu adds quietly, eyes taking on a faraway look.

"Yeah." Parad glances at Emu. "That's why you left the pro-gaming world all those years ago, isn't it."

Emu startles, darting a surprised glance at him before huffing out a laugh when he pointedly raises a brow at Emu. They've been intertwined with each other for years so it's pretty much a given to know about the other is thinking even without saying anything— bond or no bond.

"You're right." Emu leans his head against his. "Don't get me wrong, I love gaming but after meeting Kyoutarou-sensei all those years ago, I started to want to be someone who saves lives." A flash of pain and Emu sighs. "At first, it was like a penance for my suicide attempt but...the more I learned about doctors, the more I wanted to be one."

With a hum, he noses Emu's hair. "I'm glad that you stuck by your choice in being one."

"Thank you," Emu murmurs, cuddling against him.

For a long while, they stay silent; just breathing and basking in each other's presence.

In the morning quiet, he thinks about his jumbled thoughts and emotions of careers and moving with his own drive instead of just floating down the flow. Parad takes comfort that his path with always parallel with Emu's but even he knows that between the two of them, Emu is the one who's been paving his path instead of riding along the tracks.

And Parad _wants_ that for himself too.

Hence, the holograms of diagrams filled with career choices.

"I've noticed that there's a pattern amongst these choices," Emu speaks up, breaking him out of his thoughts.

His brows furrow in confusion at that. "Oh?"

Pattern? He doesn't recall seeing a pattern in his choices.

Emu chuckles, shoulders shaking.

Glancing down, he finds Emu pinning him with a look that can only be described as warm, loving pride. "Sweetheart, they're _all_ careers that have something to do with helping people."

He blinks. Then, he turns to look at the lists and the diagrams and finds— hold on. Emu's right. Flailing, he feels his face heating up in embarrassment. "That's...!"

He didn't even realise that he chose the careers based on that! But...maybe that's a good thing? He _does_ want to help people. Partly to atone for what he did in the past and partly because he actually _likes_ helping people. He's not sure if it's for self-satisfaction or because he's grown to become a better person than he used to be but helping people actually makes his heart dance.

...Is it okay to choose a career based on that though?

Parad quiets when the bond pulses in reassurance.

"It's alright." Emu brings their joint hands up to brush his lips against Parad's knuckles, smiling up at him. "Tell me?"

Biting his lip, Parad nods.

"At first," he carefully begins after a moment of gathering his thoughts. "I thought I'd go back into pro-gaming but then, I remembered how it was like— all the promotions and PR and crap. I want to _play games_, not worry about my reputation so I could bring in sponsors. I mean, almost 50% of the time it was like that." Grimacing, he scowls up at the ceiling. He remembers all the nagging he had to endure from management when he secretly went pro by using the moniker he shares with Emu when the doctor was in medical school. "Nico can do it, but me? I'd end up throwing everyone out of the window just so that they'd shut up and let me play my goddamn games."

Emu bursts out laughing.

Grinning, he relishes in that beautiful sound before turning sombre. "Then I thought I should find something that could, y'know, help me make up for my sins. Working permanently with the Ministry seems like a good of an option as any. But...while it's good work, I don't feel any passion in doing it like you do when you're taking care of kids." Parad plays with Emu's fingers, mouth twisting in thought. "I guess...I want a career that I'd be both passionate about and not mind or hell, even _thrive_ in the responsibility of it. And it's like you said. It seems like I always go back to the choices that can help people." Smacking his hands to his face, Parad groans. "I don't know."

"I think you're on the right track," Emu reassures, gently moving his hands away from his face and leans over him with a tender smile. "We can think it over carefully together if you'd like? There's no need for you to rush."

Relief washes over him at the offer.

"I'd like that very much." Cupping the side of Emu's face, Parad feels a thread of nervousness running through him. "Can I tell you something stupid?"

After Emu pointed out that one pattern, it wasn't long for Parad to spot another. However...it's a pattern he's not sure he's allowed to have.

Sensing his emotions, Emu turns his head to kiss his palm. "I don't think anything that you're planning on tell me would ever be stupid, Parad."

"What if it's about a prank?" Parad asks before wiggling his brows. "Or sex?"

"Still won't be stupid." His breath hitches when Emu licks his palm then, swirls his tongue over a finger with a saucy smirk. "Maybe crazy though but, I know it'll definitely be fun."

Swallowing, he clears his throat and ruffles his curls. "...And if it _is_ stupid?"

"That's still okay," Emu murmurs, brushing Parad's curls away from his eyes and smiles at him; all soft and loving. Damn. For all of his screw ups, Parad is grateful that he must've at least done something right to have this amazing human in love with him. "Being stupid with you is a lot of fun too, y'know."

Parad takes a deep breath and hopes that he'll always be allowed to love Emu back just as much.

"...I think I might want a career in medicine," he confesses after a long moment. When Emu's eyes widen, he breathes out a sardonic laugh. "Stupid, right?"

The bond flares in righteous indignation before his face is cradled with firm yet gentle care.

"Never," Emu says fiercely, eyes determined yet sad. "Why in the world would you think _that_, Parad?"

A bark of laughter bursts out before he can stop it. "It's _me_, Emu. After all that I've done, getting into medicine seems like a joke, doesn't it?" He waves his hands about. "While CR doesn't need to worry about game disease as much anymore, whenever we really need to, me helping you and CR to save lives? That's fine, because the ones who're really saving the patients are all of you— not me. I'm just clearing the games." Swallowing the lump in his throat, Parad points to himself with a grin; brittle at the edges. "I mean, who in their right mind would trust _me_ of all people to save lives? It'll just be one big _joke_."

"I'm not laughing." Emu's gaze is so serious and so earnest that Parad feels his grin slipping away. "I'm not laughing at all, Parad."

Biting his lip, Parad lets himself be reeled into a tight hug. He brings his arms around Emu and buries his face in the paediatrican's neck. There's a flash of memories; a glimpse of Kiyonaga that snaps him back to a time when he seriously contemplated in old fashion murder the moment he felt Emu's overwhelming pain and hurt back in medical school.

He tightens his hold onto Emu.

"And you're wrong about you not being trusted to save lives. **_I_** trust you." Emu cards a gentle hand through his curls as the doctor tightens his hold on him. "Not just with my life, but the lives of others too. Honestly, as you are now? It's impossible _not_ to trust you with people's lives."

Slowly, the tension bleeds out of him and he breathes in the human's comforting scent. "Emu."

"If you want a career in medicine then, go for it." Emu pulls back slightly and cups the back of his neck with a tender smile. "I'll support you every step of the way, Parad."

While he's still not sure if he can do it, the fact that Parad has the support of the person he loves most makes him feel that he can at least try. "Thank you."

"Always," Emu promises before he grins, running his fingers across his ribs. "Now, c'mon, no need for that frown anymore."

Trying to shield his ticklish spots is futile when he's against Emu and in no time at all, he's curled around his partner in a fit of giggles.

"There's the smile that I love," Emu murmurs fondly, bringing their lips together in a brief kiss before he shifts onto his back to stare up at the holograms. "Alright, let's see what you've got so far...ah." Glancing down at his legs, Emu moves to stand up with a sheepish grin. "Sorry, let me just grab some pants."

He snatches Emu's wrist before the human can get far.

"It can wait." Giving Emu an appreciative once over, Parad leers up at the amused doctor. "I need the break anyway."

After that emotional roller coaster, Parad thinks it's about time anyway.

He teleports them back to their bed, relishing in the sound of Emu's breathless laughter as Parad vanishes his clothes in a wave of pixels. Grinning, he cages Emu's head and leans down to catch those tempting lips in a messy kiss.

"Besides," he pants into Emu's mouth when he pulls back slightly, smug at the way Emu's pupils are completely blown. "You _did_ say you're gonna get back at me, didn't you?"

Equally breathless, Emu traces a finger across his lips. "That I did. Although..."

Parad is suddenly on his back when Emu rolls them over to hover above him. His eyes hungrily roam across Emu's naked body when the doctor makes a show in taking off his shirt; heart beating like a drum at the wicked smirk Emu gives him.

Reaching over to pin his wrists above his head, Emu then trails his other hand down Parad's stomach. "It's _my_ turn now to make you scream."

Parad slides opened his legs with a grin; gleeful at the promise of being deliciously full. "Bring it on."


	30. One more chapter

**TIMELINE**: Post-canon; established relationship

* * *

Nowadays, it's not often that Emu settles down to read a book other than a medical journal but he can't deny that it's a nice change of pace. Compared to his age group back in high school, Emu's manga collection is a great deal smaller than his games, which, he supposes isn't that much of a surprise all things considered. But after years of being surrounded by games and medical journals, Emu has to admit, picking up a manga again (a Shounen series that a patient recommended) feels pretty nice. In fact, it's the kind of story that leaves you wanting for more. The fascinating characters, combined with the mangaka's compelling plot weaving and drawing, it's a rare and wonderful treat.

Best part? He gets to share it with Parad.

They're comfortably tangled with each other in their bed and for once, they're _both_ absorbed with a manga instead of a game. The only sounds within the bedroom are the turning of the pages, with the occasional exchange of languid kisses. Thankfully, it's been an incident free week so he and Parad have had more chances to relax and cuddle.

With, or without clothes on as it is.

Tonight is one of those nights where they like to unwind after a long shift and heated lovemaking, to just lie together in the warm quiet. Time ticks. Chapter after chapter they consume as they enjoy the world the mangaka has laid out for them, while mentally expressing their thoughts and opinions through the bond.

How precious these quiet moments are, that Emu is reluctant to sleep.

...But it's late and they both need the rest.

Reluctantly, he raises his head from where it was lying on Parad's chest, about to suggest that they call it a night before feeling his breath stuttering right out of him.

The light from the bedside table is giving off a warm glow, wrapping around Parad like a halo. The sight is almost like something that came out of a dream and Emu is forever grateful that it isn't. Even though it's been three years since Gamedeus and Cronus' defeat, there are still times that he has to reassure himself that it _isn't_ a dream— that Parad is here with him; alive and safe and home. That what he shares with Parad is real and true.

That the life he's blessed with isn't the work of his lonely mind trying to fill his gaping heart caused by the extraction.

Emu has to take a moment to gather his bearings because that's a part of him that he's struggled with all his life. People leaving and him, always putting people at arm's length. Close enough to offer help and comfort but far enough that he won't get too attached when they leave. Emu hates it but, he's always been afraid to reach out lest he'd be left in the cold and empty again.

Yet, here Parad is; lying comfortably against him and not just sharing his bed but, his heart, his life— his _soul_ with Emu too. Literally.

And Emu is blessed enough to not just have all of that in his life— he gets to _keep_ them. Goodness, he's blessed enough to keep Parad in his life with the promise of forever between them; a fact that Emu believes in more and more for each passing second in their lives. Over the years, he's learned to accept that Parad will always reach back whenever Emu reaches out for him and knows that without a doubt, he can finally allow himself to hold on without fear.

Noticing his stare, Parad turns his head to him and for a moment, Emu has to fight to the sudden rush of emotions because Parad is smiling at him, soft and happy but, most importantly though?

Parad is _real. _

The bugster's eyes are warm and loving as Parad tilts his head in question, causing soft curls to sweep across his face. This is the person Emu loves; the one who calls Emu his home and has allowed him to do the same. He is so far gone and in love with Parad that at this point, he can't understand why he didn't reach out to the bugster sooner all those years ago. So much hurt could've been avoided back then if he did and considering their complicated past, Emu knows that they're _very_ lucky to even reach to where they are now.

That's why before he can stop himself, Emu leans over to press his lips against Parad's in a kiss; reveling in the taste of _home_.

Parad makes a surprised sound underneath him but quickly wraps an arm around his waist to bring Emu closer until their bare chests are flushed together; hearts faithfully beating in unison.

Once they pull back, Parad gives him a lazy smirk. "You want another round?"

"In the morning, definitely," he says, almost regrettably. He's deliciously sore and so very full; any more and he'll pass out. Not that he'd _mind_ of course but, still. "Sorry. It's...how you're _with me_ and that this— _us_ is real. It just makes me want to kiss you, y'know?"

Smirk softening into a smile, Parad kisses him then nuzzles their faces. "I _do_ know. It's the same with me whenever I look at you."

"Is that why you like sneaking in kisses even when I'm on my shift?" Emu asks with a breathless laugh, carding a hand through soft curls.

Sheepish, the bugster shrugs with an embarrassed smile. "I can't help it! You're gorgeous when you're in your element, Emu."

Blushing, he sputters at the compliment which has Parad snickering with a fond glint in his eyes. Goodness, how in the world did Emu get so lucky to have this gorgeous creature in love with him? Or that he's allowed to be in love with Parad _back_ for that matter after the mess that happened between them?

"Do you ever feel like wanting a moment to never end?" Emu inquires once he gets his bearings back.

"With you? Always."

Touched, he presses his lips on Parad's forehead then, folds his hands on top of the bugster's chest so that Emu can rests his chin. "Same; especially right now— you, me and a good manga. Or a good game, I'm not picky."

"Don't forget sated and naked," Parad sing songs with a leer.

Emu laughs. "That too."

"Well," Parad begins, brows furrowing in thought. "We can stay up for a little while longer, right? I mean, one more chapter wouldn't hurt."

"One more chapter," he agrees, reaching for the manga that lay forgotten at the side before passing it over to Parad. Emu then snuggles into his Other's side and enjoys that he's in the arms of the person he loves most— and that for this moment, they can just _be_.


	31. Don't worry about me

TIMELINE: Post-canon (immediately after Episode 45); pre-relationship.

* * *

**"Don't worry about me."**

* * *

"Probation?"

Emu looks to Parad sitting beside him by the table then, to an apologetic Hinata Kyoutarou on the screen. There's a flurry of emotions in him and he has to swallow down the anger because considering previous circumstances, Emu understands that it's necessary.

Doesn't mean he has to _like_ it.

"Which means...?"

Kyoutarou-sensei nods. "Parad has to stay in CR for the time being, yes."

"But _I'm_ a CR doctor!" Emu protests, shooting up from his seat and tries to keep his voice level. "If we fuse, Parad will be with me at all times and—"

Kyoutarou-sensei shakes his head and immediately Emu stutters off. "The Ministry finds that because of your connection to Parad, you'll be biased in your monitoring of him, Emu."

Fingers curling into fists, Emu grits his teeth in hopes to stave off the simmering anger and indignation that are threatening to burst. Losing his temper and railing against the Ministry won't help anyone; especially if it'll cause him to be separated from Parad even more than they already are.

A hand takes one of his fists to gently unfurl it from the white knuckled grip; startling him out of his thoughts. Emu blinks and turns to find Parad smiling up at him; soft and sad.

"It's okay, Emu," Parad murmurs, squeezing his fingers.

No. No, it's not okay. This is _far_ from okay.

They've just gotten back from an operation; the first one together after weeks of thinking that Parad was dead and gone from his life. For goodness sake, Emu's only reunited with Parad just hours ago and was hoping that he can have his partner with him instead of being told that Parad is basically on locked down.

He wants to rage against the Ministry for not allowing him to be the one to keep an eye on Parad— because Parad is his as Emu is Parad's, so it only makes sense that...No. If he thinks about it, he gets it. Emu _is_ quite bias when it comes to Parad despite the fact that they only spent a month together as partners and allies before Parad's death. And considering how horribly effected he was when Parad died, it's only logical to have Parad in CR instead with Emu since Parad is literally the only person that Emu would willingly compromised himself for.

Emu _still_ doesn't like it though.

"...I understand, Kyoutarou-sensei," he relents eventually with a sigh, sitting heavily back down onto his seat.

Eyes softening, Kyoutarou-sensei leans forward and addresses both him and Parad. "For what it's worth, I _am_ sorry you two."

Trading a glance with Parad, they nod at Kyoutarou-sensei and watches as the screen goes black.

Groaning, he face plants onto the table and ruffles his hair in frustration. "Bad enough you have to wear a power dampener on your ankle and now this?"

"It could be worse," Parad comments idly and Emu turns to his bugster when Parad mirrors him. "I could be stuck in a cell like Genm." Parad gives him a sardonic smile, eyes full of sadness and guilt. "And you know very well that it _should_ be worse considering my sins."

Frowning, he tucks a stray curl behind Parad's ear. "And you've done a lot to make up for those sins. I mean, I couldn't have stopped Cronus without your powers and not to mentioned that you stopped Gamedeus when no one else could. You—" A lump forms in his throat as he remembers his hand closing in on an empty space where Parad used to be. That moment still haunts him and it takes him awhile until he can breathe properly again, reassuring himself that Parad is alive and with him. "You _died_ stopping him, Parad."

"Even so." Parad leans into his touch, placing his hand over Emu's when he lingers on Parad's ear. "Don't worry about me, Emu. I promise I'll be fine here."

Sighing, he nods and absentmindedly brushes his thumb against a cheekbone. "I know. It's, well...I just got you _back,_ Parad."

"Then...do you mind if you stay for a bit longer? Maybe play some games?" Parad offers, smile wide and hopeful.

Emu doesn't even need to think about his answer; words tumbling out with relaxing ease.

"I'll do you one better." Emu grins, leaning close as if he's about to tell a secret that he only wants Parad to hear. "I'm staying tonight."

Eyes widening, Parad shuffles closer until their noses are touching. "Wha— _seriously!?"_

"Yeah!" Raising a hand, he jerks a thumb to somewhere on his left with a conspiring grin. "The on call room is right over there after all so we can rest or well, _I_ can rest in there to sleep for the night since you're nocturnal more often than not."

"You'd do that?" Parad asks, voice nothing more than a whisper and for a moment, the bugster looks painfully vulnerable as he curls into himself. "For me?"

Heart clenching, Emu feels like smacking his past self for ignoring and rejecting Parad as he did. They could've been allies far sooner if he reached out to Parad as he did with Kuroto. So, so much pain could've been prevented if he hadn't been so stubborn.

"Of course." Emu leans their foreheads together, sending a wave of remorse to the bugster through the bond they share. "I really regret that I forgot how important you are to me. A lot of hurt could've been avoided if I handled things better between us."

"Emu..." Fingers brush away his bangs as Parad frowns. "A lot of it was _my_ fault."

He shakes his head at that, adamant. "We both share the same amount of blame."

"You're not gonna budge on this, huh?" Parad comments with an exasperated huff as he folds his hands on the table to rest his chin on top of them.

Poking his tongue out, Emu mirrors Parad with a snicker. "Nope!"

They've had the same argument many times before in the early stages of their truce. Thinking back, they've had to go through a lot of their issues in the month before that final battle against Cronus. Honestly, Emu lost count on how many times they've had a screaming match or how much tears they've shed to get to the relationship they have now. While it was a necessary process, it was still quite a painful ordeal to go through.

"You were born out of my wish for a Player 2; a best friend— a partner and best match." Emu offers his fist to Parad with a tentative grin. "I want us to be better, Parad."

The beaming smile Parad gives him in answer eases the tension knotting his shoulders.

"Then better is what we'll be, Emu," Parad promises, knocking their fists together. "After all, we're invincible together, right?"

Hand shifting, he catches Parad's fist before he can pull back to intertwine their fingers. "Absolutely."

Watching as a smile blooming across Parad's face; sincere and breathtaking in its simplicity, Emu finds himself genuinely believing that as long as the both of them are together, they truly are invincible.


	32. It looks good on you

TIMELINE: Post-canon; established relationship

* * *

**"It looks good on you."**

* * *

Parad isn't sure what to make of how he looks right now.

Standing in front of the mirror, he inspects his uniform with a critical frown. It's been a long road to get to where he is and it sure wasn't easy either. But then, the things that are worth it are rarely ever easy. The uniform he's donning isn't something he managed to earn overnight and it was an effort that caused quite a bit of a headache too. However, when he looks back to the mirror and sees himself standing tall in his dark paramedic uniform (a duty shirt under a short sleeved black collared jacket, black pants and a pair of steel-toed boots to complete the look)— Parad believes it's worth it all.

For a moment, he just stares at his reflection.

Out of all the careers he's had his eye on, Parad feels that being a paramedic will suit him most. Intense, high-paced, mobile, and requires a high-level skill set in problem solving. But most importantly, a first responder in saving lives. Honestly, if anyone were to tell him years back that he'd grow to be someone who actually gives a damn about the lives of others, Parad's sure he'd laugh at their faces.

Funny how dying and being around people who work in a hospital can help change one's perspective, huh?

However, he's not exactly a typical paramedic. Considering the steady reform of the medical world in Japan within recent years along with the constant danger of kaijin and what have yous in the past couple of decades, there has since existed a class of paramedics that require a full on training medical training and MD license like any physician— an EMS doctor.

And now, he's one of them.

Straightening his collar, Parad walks out of the changing room and back to the lockers; finding Emu waiting for him on one of the benches.

Sensing his approach, Emu pauses his game and looks up at him with a smile before the paediatrican drops his console on his lap; eyes wide and mouth agape.

Well...that's a bit alarming.

Worried, Parad is about to question Emu about his reaction before he's suddenly hit by an onslaught of Emu's emotions through their bond; the awe, the sheer love and pride, and even the beginnings of arousal stirring underneath.

Oh...well, then.

Crossing his arms over his chest with a smirk, Parad leans against the doorway and tilts his head so that his bangs brush against his eyes in the way that he knows that always drive Emu crazy.

"Well," he drawls out, one of his canines peeking out as his smirk widens when Emu continues to stare in open appreciation. "What do you think?"

It takes Emu a few tries but eventually, the other doctor shakes himself and stands, pocketing his console as he makes his way to him. Once they're only a few feet apart, Emu gives him a once over; eyes roaming and lingering on his bare arms because of the short sleeves of the uniform before that tender gaze catches his own as Emu smiles.

"It looks good on you, Parad," Emu says warmly, a hint of mischief in his smile. "_Very good._"

Parad tries not to tug at his sleeves. "Yeah?"

Wearing short sleeves that does little to hide the faded scars on his arms makes him feel a bit self-conscious. Not to mentioned that he can feel a flush creeping up at the warmth in Emu's eyes.

"Yeah." Stepping close, Emu slides his palms up across his chest and shoulders before the paediatrican twines his arms around Parad's neck as his smile morphs into a saucy smirk. "In fact, it's taking a lot of effort to restrain myself from climbing you like a tree right now."

Cackling in delight, Parad wraps his arms around Emu's waist and rests their foreheads together. "That so?"

"Mmhm," Emu agrees, tilting his head up to meet him halfway for a kiss.

They stay that way for awhile, just basking in each other's company. He lets himself be pushed against one of the lockers and sighs in content as the bond thrums happily between them. There's an impression of images being shown and Parad hums when he sees all the moments that brought him here: the application process, the studying, the disbelief and prejudice against him for his desire to be a paramedic despite his status as a living breathing virus, the fights between him and Emu when frustration got the best of them— but most of all, the unwavering support from Emu and their friends as Parad defied all expectations and got his freaking license.

Yup, definitely worth it.

"I'm so proud of you, Parad," Emu murmurs against his lips, shifting to kiss the tears that are streaming down his face. "So, _so_ proud of you."

He lets out a shuddering sigh and buries his face to Emu's neck. "Thank you so much, Emu. For everything."

"Always," Emu promises, kissing his ear.

The moment is broken when their pagers beep and Parad pulls away with a groan while Emu rests his forehead on his shoulder with a chuckle.

"Time to go to work I guess," he grumbles despite the smile tugging at his lips because wow, first day of work.

"Yup." Raising his head, Emu looks at him with a smile. "Before that though..."

Carding a hand through his curls, Emu cradles his face and wipes away the tear tracks on his cheeks with his thumbs. When Emu doesn't let him go even as seconds pass, Parad tilts his head in question.

"Emu?"

Looking sheepish, Emu cups his jaw and presses a gentle kiss to his lips. "Sorry, it's just...I'm so _proud_ of you." Shaking his head, Emu steps back to grip his arms. "Geez, just let me—" There're tears in Emu's eyes as he chokes out a laugh and brings up Parad's hands to kiss the knuckles. "You have no idea how gorgeous you look, Parad."

He blushes and bites his lip, feeling breathless at the fierce love and pride in Emu's eyes. "Thanks, Emu."

Their pagers beep again and they share a laugh. It really is time to go to work now.

"Game start," he says, grinning and offering a fist to Emu.

Knocking their fists together, Emu mirrors his grin. "Let's clear this with no continues."


	33. Close your eyes and hold out your hands

**TIMELINE**: Post-canon; established relationship

* * *

**"Close your eyes and hold out your hands."**

* * *

Emu's having a bad day.

Between difficult patients, their family members and even the staff, Emu is pretty close to losing his temper. But since that's not only bad practice in a hospital, Emu himself hates losing his temper. It doesn't happen often and the only person that Emu has ever trusted himself to be in a bad mood around is at the ministry for work.

Everything feels heavy and grating, and Emu just wants to hide away in a corner to play on his game console or better yet, curl up against Parad and take a nice, long nap together.

Instead, he grits his teeth and pastes a smile onto his face— taking extra care to muffle the bond so that his mood won't effect Parad.

_'Fake it till you make it,'_ he thinks to himself. It's an old (and pretty bad) habit of his from childhood but he doesn't have much of an option at the moment.

There are instances when his temper threatens to snap (closest is against one of those 'monster parents'— who shut up very quickly when Emu's tone turned a little too frosty) but he does his best to power on through so that when it's finally time for his break, Emu quickly hides on the rooftop.

Lying on his back, Emu stares at the vast expense of the sky above him before he takes a breath and screams.

_"GODDAMMIT!"_

Breathe in...

Emu closes his eyes.

...Breathe out.

When he feels somewhat mollified, Emu throws an arm across his face with a sigh.

"Bad day?"

Jolting in surprise, he looks up to find Parad leaning over him with a sympathetic smile on his face.

Immediately, all the tension he feels just bleeds out of him at the sight of the person he loves most.

"...you could say that," he mumbles, taking the hand that Parad offers him. As his fingers curl around Parad's, he feels everything shift into normalcy, the vestiges of wrongness dispelled by the warmth of Parad's familiar touch.

This is what home feels like.

No sooner when he's on his feet, Emu buries his face against Parad's chest and hums in content when strong, lithe arms wrap around him. Tired and aching, he immediately feels safer in Parad's arms; like an unyielding shield against the outside world.

"I miss you," he breathes, taking comfort in Parad's familiar electrifying scent.

Parad kisses the top of his head. "Miss you too. You didn't need to muffle the bond, y'know?"

"I didn't want to trouble you," he confesses, voice barely a whisper and tightening his hold on Parad's waist.

Parad tips his chin up, eyes fond and exasperated. "Weren't you the one who said 'trouble me'? It's the same for me too, Emu."

"Sorry," Emu mumbles sheepishly. Then a thought crosses his mind. "Wait, what about work?"

Parad waves a hand. "It ain't going anywhere."

"Parad..." he groans, leaning his forehead on a sturdy shoulder. "You didn't have to do that for me."

Fingers run through his hair as Parad chuckles. "I wanted to, and don't worry, I made sure to finish what I was set out to do for the day." Smiling, the bugster shifts to nuzzle their faces together. "I didn't want to make you feel bad so I made sure of that before I came here."

"Oh." Warmth suffusing him at Parad's consideration for him, Emu bites his lip and wraps his arms around Parad's neck. "Then...you're done for the day?"

Parad nods with a beam. "Yup! I'm all yours for the rest of the day." The bugster makes a show of thinking hard on something before he grins. "Well, technically, I'm yours for the rest of forever but y'know, semantics."

A laugh bubbles out and oh, how Emu adores this remarkable person that he's given himself to.

"That's a relief to know."

And it really is, since he feels a lot better compared to the whole day he's been at work now that Parad is back.

Chuckling, his partner leans down to capture his lips and Emu moans in relief, tilting his head to deepen the kiss.

When they separate, Emu feels a different kind of dizzy and it's far more pleasant than the light headedness that's been a constant in his head for the betterment of an hour.

"Well," Parad muses as he cups his face, head tilting in that endearing way of his. "Since your break won't be over for another hour, why don't we go someplace else for lunch?"

Curious at the mischief in Parad's eyes, his lips twitch into a smile. "Where do you have in mind?"

"Somewhere only we know," Parad alludes with a cheeky grin. "Now, close your eyes and hold out your hands."

Emu does as he's ask, amused. "Oh, so it's a surprise?"

"Yep, so no peeking~!" Parad singsongs, large hands encasing Emu's own and he can hear the smirk in the bugster's voice as Parad leans close to whisper in his ear. "Or I'd have to punish you for being naughty."

Emu bites down a whimper when Parad slides a hand down his spine before giving his butt a playful slap.

"Duly noted," he chokes out as he tries to keep his mind away from the gutter and knows that he's failing when he hears Parad snickering. Emu huffs, mouth twisting into a mock scowl. "Jerk."

Parad hums, kissing his cheek. "But you love this jerk though."

"I do," he agrees without hesitation. "Very much."

Parad falls silent and he can feel from their connection that Parad is trying not to get overwhelmed at his admission. His heart aches in knowing that his partner still have moments where he feels that he's undeserving of love but Emu will never apologise for loving Parad and he's determined to make sure that Parad will accept that one day.

"Likewise, Emu." Parad leans their heads together. "So very much."

As Parad squeezes his hands, Emu feels the bugster brushing a kiss against his knuckles and when his lips linger, Emu blushes at the tenderness of the gesture. At times, he can't help feel a bit guilty on how spoiled he is by Parad but at the same time, Emu hoards these moments close like the treasures they are.

"Ready?" Parad asks, stepping close until their chests are pressed together.

Emu nods, smiling as he keeps his eyes closed. "Ready."

He feels the familiar pull in his navel as he and Parad teleports away from the hospital. When his feet are firmly on the ground again, Emu feels a tickling sensation brushing against his ankles not unlike grass.

Maybe they're at a park?

Before he can make any more guesswork, Parad squeezes his hands and murmurs. "You can open your eyes now."

Doing just that, Emu feels his eyes widening as his breath hitches at the sight that lays before him.

They're standing in a glade that spreads in a circular stretch of thick grass and low ferns penned in by towering redwoods. Not too far from where they are is a little river that cuts crosswise through the glade, curling into the basin of a cascade at its far end; shining like a mirror in the sunlight. Water runs in clear ribbons over a steep and rocky cliff face, framed on one side by the biggest shidarezakura tree Emu has ever seen, so big that it's branches dip to cover the whole basin in tendrils of pink.

"It's gorgeous," he breathes.

Parad breathes a soft laugh. "That's an understatement."

Grinning, he turns wide eyes to Parad, only to quickly blush when he finds that Parad isn't even looking at the glade at all— and is instead staring right at him; making it clear that Parad meant those words are for him. Emu coughs, flustered.

"I'm a mess," he protests, gesturing to his disheveled clothes. It _had_ been a bad morning after all.

Parad shrugs, unconcerned. "Doesn't make you any less gorgeous."

Fond and exasperated in equal measures, Emu can do nothing but close the gap between them; burying his fingers in soft curls and smiling into the kiss as Parad reels him close.

Turns out, Emu's bad day isn't so bad after all.


	34. That's okay I bought two

**TIMELINE**: Post-canon; pre-relationship

* * *

**"That's okay. I bought two."**

* * *

To be honest, grocery shopping is an odd experience for Parad.

Considering that he doesn't need to eat much if at all, for him to be in a grocery store is a bit...odd. But he likes the experience all the same despite the fact that it's been years since he's stepped into a grocery store. In the six years he was separated from Emu, most of the time he just stole snacks from the cafeteria in Genm co. or scarf down some electricity whenever he gets too hungry.

Surprisingly, he finds buying groceries quite relaxing and tends to look forward to it.

Finding Emu where he left him near the entrance of the store when Parad volunteered to go get the cart, he gleefully rolls the cart to a stop before Emu with both feet propped on a bar of the cart until he has to take one down to use as the brake.

When the doctor raises a single amused eyebrow, Parad merely shrugs. "Could've done a wheelie."

"Next time maybe," Emu says, humouring him with a fond grin and goes up to him until their shoulders are pressed together so that they can push the cart side by side.

He nudges Emu's head with his nose. "Got the list?"

"Yep," Emu replies, rummaging in his pockets before taking out a folded up piece of paper of their shopping list. "Let's go clear this."

Parad smirks, ducking down so that their foreheads touch. "Betcha I can finish my half of the list faster than you can."

"You're on," Emu says, returning his smirk. "Loser has to take out the trash...and no telekinesis!"

He cackles. "Deal."

One of the best things about going grocery shopping is that he gets to spend time with Emu outside of their usual environment. It's also a chance for him to feel reassured in knowing that in the years of their separation, Emu has taken better care of his diet too— as evident from the constant checking and re-checking the quality of their food.

"This one...?" Emu mutters under his breath as he inspects an apple before grabbing another one from the pile. "Or maybe this one?"

It really amuses him to no end that since Emu is far more health conscious compared to his teenaged self, Emu always ends up losing their grocery race. Parad doesn't mind though since he's content to just watch his best friend being his usual endearing and clumsy self.

While they share possession of the cart, Emu has a tendency to keep walking as he's consulting their list, causing several near collisions with other shoppers and displays if it weren't for Parad managing to steer them out of the way with steady hands on Emu's shoulders or the small of his back. A lot of times, Parad also needs to be prepared to stop at a moment's notice since Emu also has the habit of doubling back without warning.

The first time it happened when Parad first moved in, Emu fell headlong into the cart. The whole thing had been so hysterical to him that Parad ended up joining Emu when he tipped over into the cart from laughing so hard.

They were lucky they weren't kicked out that day.

Although...that was probably because they looked too ridiculously sheepish and helpless that the staff just took it in stride. If anything, the staff members seem amused by the sort of shenanigans he and Emu always get themselves into whenever they visit the store. Parad can't blame them. Because well...as invincible as he and Emu are together; especially when it comes to games and battles, they _are_ admittedly two big walking disasters in almost everything else.

Meh! You win some, you lose some.

He follows behind the doctor as Emu continues to inspect the fruits and vegetables with prodigious care, looking for nicks or bruises. When his partner spends several minutes turning different cabbages over and over in his hands, Parad surreptitiously gathers the rest of their non perishable groceries with his telekinesis and drops them into their cart.

The sound makes Emu turn around, gaping at their full cart. When the intern looks up to him, Parad gives him a cheeky wave.

"Game clear," he singsongs. "And before you ask, I only used my telekinesis on _your_ half of the grocery."

Emu groans before rubbing his neck with a sheepish smile. "I got distracted again, didn't I?"

"Yep!" Leaning forward, he nuzzles their cheeks together. "Looks like it's your turn to take out the trash, Emu."

Emu chuckles, bumping their noses before pulling away. "Fair enough. C'mon, lets go get the rest of our groceries."

"Just make sure to say your goodbyes to the cabbages~!"

Emu gives his shoulder a shove at that, scowling with mock outrage. "Oi!"

As they make their way through the dairy section, he bickers with Emu over the different brands and qualities of milk, tries to restrain himself from doubling back to the freezers to grab more ice cream (which he epically fails) and searches all over the store with Emu when they realize they forgot the cart somewhere. Again.

Like he said: Two Big Walking _**Disasters.**_

Thankfully, they're incident free once they've paid for their things at the self-checkout counter. Grabbing half of their bags, he pauses when Emu places a hand on his elbow.

Curious, he turns to Emu and yelps in surprise when something cold is placed on his lips. Blinking down, he sees a pink popsicle and a quick lick confirms that it's strawberry.

Ooooh, favourite!

Humming happily, Parad takes the proffered treat. "Thanks." He twirls the ice cream between his fingers and frowns at Emu. "But I didn't get you anything though."

"That's okay," Emu says with a shrug before rummaging into one of the bags to fish out another popsicle, identical to his own. "I bought two."

Parad smiles. "Guess we still like strawberry, huh?"

"Yup." Giving a quick lick, Emu tilts his head in thought. "Kinda funny that we like the same things but most of the time, it's in different ways."

"Different?" Walking in tandem, he shifts to allow Emu to link their arms together. "How so?"

Emu nibbles on his treat, brows furrowed. "Well...like chocolate for example. We both like chocolate but in different flavours. I prefer white chocolate while you like dark chocolate and then there's the fact that we _both_ like milk chocolate. That kind of thing."

"Ah..." Parad takes a large bite of his popsicle and smirks at the huff Emu lets out when he doesn't suffer a brain freeze. It's not that he doesn't get them; it just takes a lot more than a single bite to cause them. "We're kinda like mirrors, I guess— identical but opposites at the same time."

Emu chuckles. "Or Yin and Yang."

"Or that." Finishing his treat, Parad turns the stick over and grins in surprised delight. "Lucky~!"

Emu leans over. "You won?"

"Correction." Parad offers the stick to Emu. "_You_ won."

Surprised, his friend blinks up at him. "It's _your_ ice cream, Parad."

"Yeah, well. I know it's cheap but since I didn't get you anything..." Parad trails off with a sheepish shrug.

Emu shakes his head. "I wanted to treat you— mostly as a thank you for spoiling me all the time."

That surprises a laugh out of him. "I spoil you?"

"All the time," Emu grouses with laughing eyes before he shrugs, a bashful smile on his face. "And well, I just want to spoil you too, y'know?"

"You do," he reassures, bumping their shoulders together with a matching smile. "Everyday."

Emu rests his chin on Parad's shoulder, smiling softly. "Together then?"

"Together," he agrees, brandishing the stick to the air. "Let's go get our prize!"

Onigiri ends up being their dinner to make things easier for them to play the new game they won.

It might be the best grocery run they've ever had and from then on, they make it their little tradition to buy their favourite strawberry ice cream every time they have a grocery run.


	35. After you

**TIMELINE:** Pre-relationship; post-canon

* * *

**"After you."**

* * *

It took them awhile but eventually, after much research, coding, blackmailing Genm and looking through old files from New Genome on Parad, they manage to bring Burgermon back; reuniting the bugster back with his 'father'.

"Tsukuru~!" the busgter hugs the CEO tight before letting go with a bashful laugh. "Ah, I mean, I can call you 'Otou-san' now, right?"

Tsukuru nods furiously, face blotchy from tears. "Of course! I've got all the legal papers from the Ministry too! You're officially my son now, Burgermon!"

Watching from the side, he hides a smirk behind a raised fist and leans down to whisper into Emu's ear. "Looks like the future of Genm co. is finally in good hands, huh? Especially now that it has an official heir and all."

"Couldn't agree more," Emu murmurs back, smiling warmly at the 'father and son' pair.

Who knew that a human and bugster could be a family?

_'Then again, Emu is my family,'_ he muses to himself, glancing down at the paediatrican with a fond grin.

"Same here," Emu whispers when he catches his thoughts, glancing up at him with a smile that mirrors his own. "You're my family too, Parad."

Parad snickers, leaning against the wall behind him. "Who would've thought we'd get this far, huh? Wasn't easy though."

"Yeah," the doctor agrees, resting beside him so that their shoulders are pressed together. "But it was all worth it."

Parad hums. "It was." Reaching for Emu's hand, he feels his grin widening when Emu intertwines their fingers.

"Thank you, Emu-kun! Parad-kun!" Tsukuru exclaims, still crying and bowing profusely to them. "Thank you so much!"

Emu waves with his free hand, shaking his head with a kind smile. "It's no problem, Tsukuru-san. We're happy that we could help."

"Live well, Mon," he says to his fellow bugster with a cheeky grin. "And make sure to create lots of awesome video games with your dad, yeah?"

Burgermon nods, clapping his hands. "Certainly, Parad-sama!"

"No need for the 'sama', y'know," Parad mutters and pouts at the laugh Emu lets out.

Burgermon gapes, scandalized. "I wouldn't dare disrespect the Progenitor!"

"I'm your friend more than the Progenitor," he states firmly and raises a pointed brow when Burgermon looks like he's about to protest.

Slowly, the other bugster relents with a nod as Burgermon rubs the back of his neck. "Understood, Parad-senpai."

"Guess that's the best I can get," he says with a rueful huff.

Emu chuckles beside him, a teasing glint in his eyes. "Oh, I don't know, I think it suits you quite well." For a brief moment, the teasing smile on Emu's lips morphs into something flirtatious as the doctor tilts his head demurely. _"Parad-senpai."_

Okay, wow. That suffix has no right to sound that sexy. Geez, anyone who has ever thought that Houjou Emu is naive and innocent really doesn't know the doctor at all.

Clearing his throat, he looks away with a smile. "Chronologically, I'm technically younger than you, remember?"

"Only by...three years, right?" Emu counters, shrugging with a thoughtful hum. "Since you were created in 1995 and born with a free will on Y2K."

He nods. "Yep. Hell of a gestation period, huh?"

Emu bursts out laughing at that.

"Ah, before I forget!" Tsukuru exclaims, catching their attention as the CEO flits around his desk to rummage through the drawers. Once he finds whatever he's looking for, Tsukuru lets out a triumphant shout and raises a demo CD up for them to see. "Here it is!"

Parad exchanges a look with Emu. Before either of them can question the man, Tsukuru darts to the front of the office to where the game console is and slides the CD in place. A moment later the TV screen comes to life and shows them the start menu of JuJu Burger.

"I finally finished the game," Tsukuru exclaims proudly, turning to them and gestures to the screen. "If you're okay with it, maybe you two would like to be the first ones to try it out?"

They both light up at the offer. "Can we?!"

Production for JuJu Burger had been delayed for months because Tsukuru made it clear that he wanted the game to be released only when Burgermon finally comes back safe and alive. As the months went on, so did the anticipation for the game. To know that they'd be first ones to play it is so freakin' _cool!_

Tsukuru nods, smiling at their enthusiasm. "Of course! Think of it as a bit of a thank you for what you've both done."

An exchange of grins between him and Emu before they whoop and bound up to Tsukuru while Burgermon follows them with a chuckle.

Standing in front of the console, he's startled when the controller for Player 1 is offered to him. Surprised, he turns to find Emu grinning at him and shakes the controller slightly when Parad doesn't immediately take it.

"After you," Emu offers.

His brows furrow. "But you've always been Player 1, Emu."

"That's why." Emu presses the controller into his hands and he grips it in confusion. "We're partners, Parad— _equals._ I want you to be my Player 1 just as much I've always been yours."

Oh.

...Oh!

While there's barely any difference between Player 1 and 2 when they're actually playing the game, no one can argue the undeniable fact that Player 1 will always be in control of the game itself; from the START button to PAUSE.

While it's true that Emu is offering the controller in a gaming context, Parad can see that it's more than that from the tentative smile on Emu's face.

Partners. Equals.

Both in control.

"Thanks, Emu," he murmurs, using the bond to wrap it around Emu in warm gratitude.

Emu ducks his head, grabbing the other controller with a blushing smile. "Anytime."

Standing in front of the screen, they both grin at Burgermon.

"Ready when you are, Mon-kun," Emu says, gripping his controller tight.

Parad snickers. "And get ready to be impressed!"

"Most certainly!" Disappearing in a flurry of pixels, Burgermon reappears within the screen and waves at them. "Ready!"

Tsukuru chuckles, fond and gives them two thumbs up. "Have fun!"

"We will~!" they singsong, trading high fives.

Parad presses START and the music begins.

"Alright then." Shifting his stance, he throws a feral grin at Emu. "My heart's dancing!"

Laughing, the doctor nods with a challenging smirk. "Let's clear this with no continues!"

And clear the game they do—

"Game start!"

— side by side.


	36. We'll figure it out

**Timeline**: Post-canon, Established Relationship

* * *

They're at the hospital's laundry room, getting fresh sheets for the beds to help out the nurses.

"Careful now," Parad murmurs against his lips when Emu couldn't muffle a particularly loud moan, hands under Emu's rear to support him against the wall. "Or they might hear us."

He breathes out a laugh, licking into Parad's mouth and tightens his legs around Parad's hips. "Wouldn't want that."

Or at least, they're _supposed_ to.

...oops?

"I'd probably blind them if anyone gets a glimpse of you like this," Parad grumbles, causing Emu to snicker.

Hugging his bugster close, Emu presses a kiss to swollen lips. "Why do you think I got so agitated at that new intern when she stared at you for too long?"

"That was _your_ fault!" Parad counters with a laugh. "I mean, I looked so well fucked that I think the whole hospital was staring at me."

His brows raise at that. "Seriously?"

"I was _limping_, Emu." The expression on Parad's face turns deadpanned and exasperated. "I'm a bugster— the Progenitor with a healing factor even, and I was left _limping_ after you made love to me."

He huffs, hiding his burning face into Parad's neck. "She still shouldn't have stared at you like...that."

"That?" Parad asks, lips against his temple.

He pulls back with a pout. "She was drooling."

"Was she?" Parad tilts his head before smirking in impish delight. "I wonder if it's because she saw your cum dripping out of my pants that time."

Emu blinks. Then does it again in rapid succession when he processes Parad's words.

"It was?" Emu asks, voice strangled and head dizzy at the thought of Parad being so full of Emu that his bugster had literally been wet and dripping. "_Were_ you?"

Parad chuckles, dark and seductive. "Always am whenever you take me."

"Hot damn," he mutters, thumping his head against a broad shoulder with a whine. "Blinding people so that they'll never see that is getting a little too tempting."

Parad snickers in agreement, amused. "So is that a no to you being full of my cum for your entire shift?"

"Never said that...although, I don't think we have that much time. Plus, public space," Emu says regretfully. He raises his head hopefully. "Merge us, maybe?"

Parad smiles, eyes softening as his vision bleeds crimson. "Always."

The door jiggles nearby just as Emu's vision bleeds in response, startling them so badly that Parad accidentally slams the button for the laundry chute beside his head—

"Oh no," he mutters when he feels empty space where the wall used to be against his back.

— before they both fall into the chute, screaming.

There's a dizzying moment of vertigo as they finish the merge out of surprise before they slide down uncontrollably fast like some sort of roller coaster.

"I thought this only happens in cartoons!?" Parad shouts out around an incredulous laugh.

Helplessly exasperated, he joins in. "Clearly not in _our_ life!"

"Whee~!"

They land with a soft thump on a large pile of laundry, laughing and wheezing at the ridiculousness of what just happened.

Shaking his head, Emu stumbles to his feet, only to quickly tumble back down when he feels how off his center of gravity is at the moment. Concerned, he starts to check over his body—

"...eh?"

— only to stop when Emu realises that it's _not_ his body at all.

"Parad...?"

Parad shuffles inside their mindscape. "Yeah? You okay?"

"We merged." Emu curls long fingers into a fist and lets out a disbelieving laugh. "Using _your_ body."

"...ha?" There's a brief sensation of having shared vision before Parad yelps. "We merged!"

Nodding, he tips back to lie on the pile. "We did."

"You're inside me," Parad breathes.

Emu smirks, reaching down to cup Parad's arousal in his palm. "Seems like."

"That is so sexy," Parad whispers, awed before letting out a loud whoop. "This is so _cool!"_

Snickering, he carefully gets up and stumbles out of the pile. "It really is." He bites his (Parad's?) lip though when a thought crosses his mind. "Just...um, my body?"

"Is safe," Parad reassures. "It's right here. Just like mine whenever I merge with you."

He slumps in relief. "How though? I'm human."

"Maybe it's because you're Patient Zero?" Parad suggests.

"...Maybe."

Now that the surprise and delight of discovering this new ability of his has somewhat fade, worry sets in. Is this version of their merge hurting Parad? Will they be able to separate when Emu has no clue how?

Parad wraps the bond around him and he can feel his bugster hugging him. "Hey, don't worry, we'll figure it out."

"...Yeah." It might be new and a bit worrying but he's not alone. He has Parad with him after all. "We always do."

In the end, they do manage to figure out to separate themselves again with relative ease.

..._after_ they take advantage of their new ability in private of course.


	37. Can I kiss you?

**TIMELINE**: Post-canon; getting together

* * *

**"Can I kiss you?"**

* * *

Spring is Emu's favourite season.

And it's not only because he was born in spring either. He likes how the world slowly comes back to life after months of sleep— loves it even more when the cherry blossoms burst to life again and their petals take to the air like a flurry of pastel coloured snow.

Staring up at the shidezakura above him, Emu breathes in the spring air with a smile. The grass underneath his bare feet is warmed by the sunset, a comforting presence that steadies his whirling mind. The world is beautiful at this time with blurred edges that give way to the more solemn shades of nighttime. Nevertheless, he finds his smile widening into a besotted grin; drawn to the touch of long fingers brushing along his hair and down to his jaw.

As he turns, Emu leans into Parad's touch and feels his heart aching sweetly in his chest at the tender way Parad is looking at him.

They haven't said anything for the rest of the time they've been here in their glade as they stand side by side, watching as the sky slowly bleeds into their colours after hours of playing their games. But Emu doesn't think they need to. Their relationship has evolved in ways that no one; not even they themselves, had anticipated— to a point that sometimes, they don't even need words or the bond for the other to just _know._

And looking at Parad right now, Emu knows that there's a decision in the bugster's eyes that has his breath stuttering. A promise, he believes. It takes form as a fiery glint in the bugster's eyes, banked and flickering in quiet contemplation.

Even without the bond, Emu knows what Parad's thinking.

Parad is well aware that Emu wants to kiss him just as much as Emu knows that Parad wants to kiss him back. Their conversation and pseudo kiss from months prior is constantly in the back of their minds after all.

The reality of that always makes him pause, makes him wonder how far they've come. Because as stolen memories implied, they were friends once...then most certainly _not_. They've hurt each other, heal each other and somehow found their way to drift together again, closer than ever. It was difficult and painful but gentle touches and childish banter shared between them come easy now.

Except for that pseudo kiss, neither of them tried anything similar since then. Partly because they still have lingering guilt over the ways they've hurt each other while the other reason is because neither of them are ready yet.

So.

Months pass as slowly but surely, they clear up remnants of the mess they were caught in for so long. Soon enough, they get a little bolder. A little more hopeful for each lingering touch, hug and kiss.

Emu isn't worried though.

He waits; patient as Parad takes closer steps towards him each and every day. And he does the same; step by step. That's why when his bugster steps close to gently cradle his face in this moment frozen in time, Emu knows that the wait is over.

Emu smiles.

With one hand between Parad's shoulder blades, Emu reaches up cup Parad's jaw with his free hand and brushes his thumb across impish lips. He breathes out a laugh when Parad flicks his tongue out with a smirk before the bugster dips his head to shower him with kisses.

A kiss to the right cheek; shy and sweet, before lips brush across to press a kiss to the left; soft and affectionate.

_I adore you._

A kiss to the nose; playful and whimsical.

_I like you._

A kiss to both eyelids; gentle and fond.

_I admire you._

A kiss to the forehead; warm and tender.

_I cherish you._

A kiss to both hands; adoring and devoted.

_I respect you._

A kiss to the wrist as lips linger on the pulse point; awed and reverent.

_I trust you._

A kiss to the ear, longing and seductive.

_I want you._

A kiss to the neck; passionate and arousing.

_I treasure you._

He's trembling, eyes burning with tears streaming down his face for each kiss, each whispered word, and each caress from within the bond.

_No end and no beginning, Emu._

At this moment in a time where it's his and Parad's alone as he's made aware of how cherished and adored he is, Emu knows with every fibre of his being that he will never love another because everything that he is, was, and ever will be— belongs only with Parad.

Always.

When Parad's mouth brush against his, a spark of golden power; of promise eternal runs through them, and Emu lets out a tremulous sigh. He blinks. And he looks up at Parad underneath tear stained lashes and sees him with sunlight in his hair, the lines of his face softer and more gentle in this moment. He looks breathtaking like this and is it such a wonder that Parad is the one he longs for so deeply?

Emu waits, and the question comes without pomp or fanfare— just a simple shape of words on a lazy evening.

"Can I kiss you?" Parad asks quietly, a soft whisper lingering between them.

Emu takes in Parad's expression, content and patient yet so very hopeful.

It's vulnerability, trust and faith— a promise of invincibility.

_'I am so in love with you.'_

The thought comes unbidden and without warning; as natural as breathing.

Emu doesn't know what kind of face he's making, is always unsure and left startlingly open when it comes to anything revolving around Parad. However, he thinks it might be something good because there's a blush chasing across Parad's cheeks and a light in his eyes that makes his heart sings.

"Yes."

His answer comes easy, tumbling past his lips as if its been waiting to be given voice.

They stare at each other and Emu reaches out to gently hold the back of Parad's neck as his bugster tips up Emu's face and they meet each other halfway.

Their lips touch, and it tastes of home.

The kiss is soft and innocent at first, but the intensity grows and ricochets through the bond. As Parad's lips becomes more insistent, Emu's mouth opens willingly under his. Their tongues come together and Parad makes a soft sound in Emu's mouth as Emu slides his hand up to bury it in Parad's curls.

The bond pulses in power and they're soon plunged under the singularity thrumming between them.

They're bathed in warm gold, both light and dark as they're surrounded by shifting colors of their fused souls. There are no words, only sensations, and they're happy to drown in them as they float in the gold together with an irresistible push and pull between them. They reach out, a mirror to each other and when they touch, there's no end and no beginning between them.

_You're me and I'm you, and we're— **us.**_

They're loved, eternally and invincibly.

Eyes fluttering opened reluctantly, Emu blinks past his tears and he's met with watery dark eyes; bright with love, adoration and a whole depth of emotion that he wouldn't have believed possible to be directed towards him until he met Parad. Overwhelmed, he throws his arms around Parad's shoulders, holding his bugster close. Emu takes a shuddering breath as Parad wraps long arms around his waist, feeling a lump in his throat because his mind is spinning and his heart is beating too rapidly because he's so in love and he wants Parad to know that.

So he steps close to return every sentiment with kisses that mirror Parad's own.

A kiss on each cheek.

"You're my heart," he murmurs, smiling against the skin as it warms under his lips. Lips trail across to press a kiss to the nose. "My joy."

On both eyelids. "My happiness."

"My treasure," he breathes, pressing a lingering kiss on the forehead and feels Parad's curls tickling his nose. When he pulls back, he finds Parad crying in earnest and Emu's trembling lips lift up into a fond, adoring smile.

Bringing Parad's hands up to his lips, Emu brushes a kiss to the knuckles and murmurs against the skin. "My life."

Parad lets out a whimper, leaning his forehead on his and Emu smiles through his tears.

"My soul," he breathes out reverently, kissing the left wrist and lingers on the pulse point. Reaching up, he leans close to press his lips against a flushed ear and whispers. "My everything."

_Can we? _

_Together? _

_You and me forever?_

He cradles Parad's face and wipes away the tears from dark eyes before leaning up to press a kiss to Parad's neck; right above his pulse.

"My home," he promises like a sanctum. "My Parad."

Emu doesn't know how he's ever deserved this, doesn't understand how he can have this person of impish grins and fierce devotion with him like this, but he wants to try.

Spring is rebirth and of new beginnings.

And as their lips meet again, Emu finds that he can add a more wonderful reason why he loves it and smiles into the kiss with the promise of countless of more to come.


End file.
